Goddammit, I wish I'd never posted this stupid thread.
Eris is a MOTHERFUCKING BITCH. I would say I like what you wrote, but considering how wonderfully friendly some people are around here to me no matter what I post, I'll refrain.
Or the fairies are. Or the Grand Sense of Humor that Rules the Universe. Somebody thinks I'm funny.
Since wandering into the Discordian pie-stand, I have observed the following:
-Weird shit happening....
Here's a couple answers I've heard from Christians who believe Satan is everywhere waiting to get you (although I'm translating from God to Goddess, and from Satan to Greyface). Choose one:
1) If your heart were truly right with Goddess, Greyface wouldn't be able to touch you like that. If Greyface is able to get you that much, the reason you're having so many problems is because you aren't right with Goddess. Your problems mean you're doing Bad!
2) Now that you're with Goddess, Greyface doesn't like it. So Greyface is really going after you to try to get you back. That's why you're having so many problems. Your problems mean you're doing Good!
Thanks, that's, um. Nice.
Unfortunately, this was never intended to be a serious thread. Had I lurked longer, I would have discovered the Open Bar or a similar thread and posted it there instead. I misinterpreted the word "rants" in the description of the "Or Kill Me" forum; that's all. In addition, as it's been pointed out, tone carries really fucking poorly over the internet.
I have a cat. I love my cat dearly. I love him dearly, because
(among numerous other reasons) he is a HORRIBLE BASTARD who does really cruel things to my limbs and furniture, and makes an even bigger mess of my apartment than I do of my own.
I repeat: I love my cat. BECAUSE HE IS A HORRIBLE BASTARD. BECAUSE HE CREATES CHAOS IN UNEXPECTED AND HILARIOUS WAYS. I'm proud of his ingenuity, delighted by his energy, glad of the company even when I'm cursing him out and calling him names. The entertainment value after the fact is usually worth whatever lost sleep and inconvenience are caused by Yggi's behavior. If he's too quiet, I worry.
This is what dog people do not understand about cat people. If I were to go into a forum filled with non-cat-lovers and make a post about how Yggi dragged me back from the bring of sleep last night by jumping on my face and making crazy noises-- or how he slashed open another new bag of kitty litter all over my bed-- or how I had to take down most of the decorations in my apartment when he proved there was no high point he wasn't ingenious enough to reach-- they'd tell me to stop complaining. ""Wait-- so you WENT OUT AND GOT A CAT, and you are now complaining about a few messes and shredded sofas? Welcome to MISSING THE POINT, a place just south of WAAAAH." (In such a hypothetical instance, such a hypothetical response might be accused of MISSING THE POINT.)
There is complaining, and complaining. I generally complain more to make conversation than for any serious reason. I unfortunately did so here in such a way as to come across as totally serious, which I was in fact not. So, like, just putting that out there.
You may now return to your regularly scheduled threadjack.