Gems from his lovingly crafted wiki jack off session:
editor and chief writer of one of the most important of the new generation of Discordian/Personist works, Ek-sen-trik-kuh Discordia: The Tales of Shamlicht. This book is a rarity as it's the subject of several commentaries, including one by United States Senate candidate Al Barger [1], and is highly controversial even though it hasn't been yet been published.
So important and controversial, I have yet to see it discussed anywhere outside of Discordian internet communities. And very rarely among even them.
At age 12, Bruce found his first love in a 15-year-old church choir member he nicknamed Malch. He volunteered as a janitor to clean up after practice so he could be near her. He also amused her with his antics, including sneaking up behind the choir director during a rehearsal and pretending to direct with a toilet plunger. One day at her home, she gave him his first French kiss.
But she refused to listen to him after he ceremoniously handed her a roll of toilet paper on which he had written "An Ode to M's Commode." She was convinced he had spied on her while she was sitting on the toilet, and refused to believe his denials.
tl,dr: "THROUGH THE GLORIOUS POWER OF WIKI, THE WORLD SHALL KNOW MY TRITE LIFE STORY! THEY SHALL BOW TO HOW COMICALLY ZANY I WAS AS A CHILD!"
He became withdrawn. He challenged his teachers and grandparents, and when asked to quote Bible verses, would recite ones that were violently or sexually explicit. He was perhaps the only student in a Christian school who was forbidden by a teacher to read from the Bible.
br00tal dude. You were totally hXc as a kid.
As of mid 2008, the book, some of which has been posted online, is apparently nearly completed, and the group will soon be looking for a publisher. It includes articles on animal and human sex, humorous and explicit illustrations, ek-sen-trik discordian holy days, essays, humorous stories, rants, poetry, and even the Smagmoid Kids Club. It promotes Personism, the concept that each person should be accepted and respected as individual, and also contains references to the group's activities, including some veiled clues about the members and information on the original Ek-sen-triks and Discordians.
I'll come for the essays and humorous stories, but I'll stay for the animal sex and explicit illustrations. Sign me up for a preorder.
