TV licenses. Fucking retarded.
Yeah. I took mad offense at being forced to pay one as I had no TV, but the license man who came round said, 'ah, well, see, your PC has a TV in card, and that is technically capable of receiving BBC one if you plug it into that socket there see?'
'The fucking socket blocked behind my solid oak 10 foot bookshelf in a frankly unusable position yes?' said I
'Yes' says he.
'MEH!' said I.
What happens if you don't pay the license fee?
"Greetings, my friend. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future. You are interested in the unknown... the mysterious. The unexplainable. That is why you are here. And now, for the first time, we are bringing to you, the full story of what happened on that fateful day. We are bringing you all the evidence, based only on the secret testimony, of the miserable souls, who survived this terrifying ordeal. The incidents, the places. My friend, we cannot keep this a secret any longer. Let us punish the guilty. Let us reward the innocent. My friend, can your heart stand the shocking facts of grave robbers from outer space?"