AUTO-FELLATIO PERFORMERS ONLY

[dontblameyoko]

Rizzo was the shooter on the grassy knoll, but he wasn't aiming for JFK, he was aiming at a tin can that he missed horribly.

He also is the primary responsible party for emo music.

i laughed

but i i'm sure my parents wouldn't.

Yeah, parents never see the inherent humour in assassination.

i feel sorta bad for laughing
they actually remember that assassination.

i can only imagine the horrible jokes that ppl in my (as yet unborn) kids' gneration will tell about 9/11.  oh wait...the jokes have already started....

[Phox]

[Balls Wellington]

see, that's the stuff they sell in teh islands and I still think it tastes like skunk piss.

Well then, in that case, it seems that your taste is objectively wrong. I see no other option here! Hope you still got the receipts on your taste-buds.

[El Twid]

Rizzo is responsible for the collapse of the Soviet Union. Not because of organized political action, but because he was the one who got Boris Yeltsin tanked that morning.

this one is actually (at least partly) believable.
i'm assuming that by "tanked" you mean "drunk."

Yes

[dontblameyoko]

speaking of which: http://www.explosm.net/comics/2250/ (not worksafe)

[dontblameyoko]

actually, now that i think of it:  the wrong part of his head is exploding.

[Phox]