So, it's been awhile since I've written some total shit and had it torn apart from the community, so here it goes.
I'm No Discordian
So, you want to be a Discordian, huh?
Don’t even bother. It isn’t something you want to be.
Why? Well, it’s simple: it’s not as easy as it looks.
Look, when I first joined Discordia, I did it for all the wrong reasons. I was pissed at the Establishment. Christian jerks were damning me to Hell. People were blind sheep.
Most importantly, I wanted to be different.
Oh, that. Different. That’s what drove me and, odds are, drove many to Discordia’s arms. We wanted to change the world. And to do that, all we had to do was sit on our asses and wait.
Except, we forgot a detail. We became what we raged against.
Sitting on are asses, we became part of the Establishment. We damned people to the land of Thud. We were following influential Discordians, a herd of black sheep following a whacked-out shepherd.
In sum, we were just like we were before. No less different.
Face it. You’re a Discordian because you wanted to seem weird. No shame in that. That was another reason I joined.
However, let’s think for a second.
Did the Establishment do anything to us? Never harmed me. All the Christians I knew never once said I was going to Hell. And everyone I knew was quite out of their minds.
Were we really pissed at anything? I think we made it all up.
Sure, there’s more to Discordianism than meets the eye. But that’s the problem with most of us. We see the damn posters, but do we hang any of them up? We vow to make the day weirder, but by lunchtime, we’ve all but forgotten about this.
And then, some of us have the balls to take Discordia too seriously.
What a laugh.
There’s always someone fighting about what makes a “real” Discordian, usually by people who thought it meant being totally offensive and a complete dick.
Well, I’m not going to lie. I’m no Discordian. But I’ll still carry the flag.
Who knows. Maybe I’ll be leading my own little herd one day.
Until then, I’ll just think of other people’s original thoughts.
P.S. Of course, I could also be the only idiot here without a fucking clue. That's been know to happen.