Author Topic: Shameless Slander #5: Nigel  (Read 64 times)

Doktor Howl

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Shameless Slander #5: Nigel
« on: May 06, 2015, 07:00:17 pm »
Nigel studies neuroscience, which is a word that probably means something.  In her case, it probably means, "I am sick of tacos de sesos and there's probably another use for this stuff".  To the rest of us, it means she can describe our brains in a manner that our brains can't understand, which gives her an obvious advantage.  I am unsure how much of her ranting I believe, however.  I know I have a soul, because my soul hurts when people play John Meyer on the radio.  She says that's physiological in nature and would also harm a cat, which has no soul.  Thing is, I don't care about cats.  I don't hate them, I just am not a cat person, and neither is John Meyer, obviously.

Nigel has visited me once and I have visited her once and now I know 1/4 as much about her as I knew before 2010, because the whole time during both occasions, she was telling my brain what.  Which she is trained to do, but I am both untrained and unequipped to deal with.  This sort of education made me dumber, or at least more ignorant.

She has a camera in her stomach and an old man at the end of the pipe (which Portland uses in place of a subway), and she shoves people off of bridges and blames it on the rain or the bridges themselves which apparently attack the soul she ALSO says you don't have.  She makes NO SENSE, and I see through her devices.  Portland is INSIDE THE DOME, but Nigel is not.  In fact, the main reason people don't look out of the dome is she likes suddenly rearing out of the mist and slapping herself up against the dome, which in turn makes people's poop try to run away without them.  This is why all the beardos in Portland wear parachute pants.  They do.  Look it up. 
« Last Edit: May 06, 2015, 07:01:53 pm by Doktor Howl »
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Re: Shameless Slander #5: Nigel
« Reply #1 on: May 06, 2015, 07:11:52 pm »
 :lulz: :lulz: :lulz:

John Meyer is just an illusion, really. Don't look up. Never look up.
Im guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk, Charles Wick said. It was very complicated.



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