Author Topic: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.  (Read 442 times)

Doktor Howl

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ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« on: June 21, 2011, 05:22:55 pm »
#1 OZYCRAPULOUS

I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered toilet lies, whose commode
And blasted lid, and veneer of cold and crusted poop
Tell that its sculptor well those movements read
Which yet survive, sloppped on these lifeless things,
The hand that wiped them and the anus that bled.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Doktor Howl, King of Tucson:
Look on my poop, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The loose and level turds stretch far away.
Don't tell me what to fucking do.  In exchange, I will not tell you what to fucking do.  Note that mocking each other's actions is still permissable under this system.

Doktor Howl

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #1 on: June 21, 2011, 05:26:20 pm »
#2:  The Horace Smith Version:

In Tucson's filthy silence, all alone,
Stands a gigantic turd, which far off throws
The only shadow that the Desert knows:
"I am great DOKTOR HOWL," carved in the porcelain throne,
"The King of Kings; this mighty shit shows
"The smears upon my hand." The City's gone,
Nought but the turd remaining to disclose
The site of this forgotten water closet.
We wonder, and some Hunter may express
Wonder like ours, when thro' the wilderness
Where Chicago stood, holding the septic tank in place,
He meets some feces huge, and stops to guess
What powerful but unrecorded race
Once shat in that annihilated place.

Don't tell me what to fucking do.  In exchange, I will not tell you what to fucking do.  Note that mocking each other's actions is still permissable under this system.

Nigel

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #2 on: June 21, 2011, 05:27:25 pm »
 :x Evocative.
Tiny and Terrible Strap-On Fuckhorde of Tonight's Wrong Turn.

“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”

“People get used to anything. The less you think about your oppression, the more your tolerance for it grows. After a while, people just think oppression is the normal state of things. But to become free, you have to be acutely aware of being a slave.”
― Assata Shaku

Doktor Howl

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #3 on: June 21, 2011, 05:34:38 pm »
:x Evocative.

Tomorrow, I improve Rudyard Kipling.
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Idem

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #4 on: June 21, 2011, 05:44:31 pm »
 :argh!:

Slyph

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #5 on: June 21, 2011, 07:32:13 pm »
Twas Shit and the Shitty Shit did Shit and Shit upon the Shit, all Shitty where the Shits, and the Shitty Shites Outshat.

(not calling this shit, I lailed)

Doktor Howl

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #6 on: June 21, 2011, 08:42:36 pm »
Twas Shit and the Shitty Shit did Shit and Shit upon the Shit, all Shitty where the Shits, and the Shitty Shites Outshat.

(not calling this shit, I lailed)

Joke dead.  I was going to do Kipling by channeling MRH, but this post has killed any desire to do so.
« Last Edit: June 21, 2011, 08:44:18 pm by Doktor Howl »
Don't tell me what to fucking do.  In exchange, I will not tell you what to fucking do.  Note that mocking each other's actions is still permissable under this system.

Eve

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #7 on: June 21, 2011, 08:49:03 pm »
You offend my poetry-loving sensibilities, sir. :horrormirth:

;) I laughed anyway.
Emotionally crippled narcissist.

Slyph

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #8 on: June 21, 2011, 09:32:30 pm »
Twas Shit and the Shitty Shit did Shit and Shit upon the Shit, all Shitty where the Shits, and the Shitty Shites Outshat.

(not calling this shit, I lailed)

Joke dead.  I was going to do Kipling by channeling MRH, but this post has killed any desire to do so.

Dim Mak motherfucker.

Doktor Howl

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #9 on: June 21, 2011, 09:33:18 pm »
Twas Shit and the Shitty Shit did Shit and Shit upon the Shit, all Shitty where the Shits, and the Shitty Shites Outshat.

(not calling this shit, I lailed)

Joke dead.  I was going to do Kipling by channeling MRH, but this post has killed any desire to do so.

Dim Mak motherfucker.

Sorry, I don't speak Belgian.  Fuck off.
Don't tell me what to fucking do.  In exchange, I will not tell you what to fucking do.  Note that mocking each other's actions is still permissable under this system.

Dysfunctional Cunt

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #10 on: June 21, 2011, 09:42:50 pm »
 :cry:

But I wanted to read the Rudyard Kipling....

rikki tikki tavi....

DAMN you slyph  :argh!:

Doktor Howl

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #11 on: June 21, 2011, 09:45:06 pm »
:cry:

But I wanted to read the Rudyard Kipling....

rikki tikki tavi....

DAMN you slyph  :argh!:

I was gonna do Tommy Atkins and MacDonough's Song.  I still might.
Don't tell me what to fucking do.  In exchange, I will not tell you what to fucking do.  Note that mocking each other's actions is still permissable under this system.

Slyph

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #12 on: June 21, 2011, 09:45:56 pm »
Well, I had a good innings. Cya folks.

Doktor Howl

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #13 on: June 21, 2011, 09:47:52 pm »
Well, I had a good innings.

What does that mean?
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Luna

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Re: ITT, I wreck classic poetry.
« Reply #14 on: June 21, 2011, 09:50:37 pm »
If it means Sylph is trying to stifle creativity around here, somebody needs to be fucked sideways, with a chainsaw.

This was awesome, Dok.
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