English is crazy talk.

[Emo Howard]

I've been talking to a friend of mine at work about the English language. He is from Laos and speaks Laotian, Chinese and English.

Somebody used the phrase "in a minute" and he asked me what that meant. His English seems to be pretty good, so I assumed that he understood what the words minute, second, hour, day, etc meant. I explained that it meant "Soon... within a few minutes".

Then I remember that i had been thinking of phrases in English that make no sense a few weeks earlier just lying in bed one night. The only one I could remember was "have to".



"Have to"

WTF is that shit?

"I have to go to the bathroom."

You mean you need to go to the bathroom?

"Have" and "need" are pretty much antonyms. That phrase should mean the opposite of what it does. It should mean "do not need to."

"Do you need to go to the bathroom"?
"No, I have to."

That make more sense, logically.

"I have to go to the bathroom." makes about as much sense as "I get for go to the bathroom", or "I send at go to the bathroom".



I know there are more, but that's the only one I could think of at the time, or now.

[Cain]

Or "I am being physically coerced into the bathroom".

[El Twid]

Or bathroom when toiletroom is really what you are going for. I would be pissed if you dropped a load in my tub.

[Balls Wellington]

Well, you're probably glad I didn't come to the meetup.

[El Twid]

i said MY tub.

[El Twid]

Note to self. If ech's in boston meet at bar. Dont invite over.

[Eve]

Well, you're probably glad I didn't come to the meetup.

Did you shit in my tub when I was at work?

If so, thanks for cleaning up after yourself.

[Nadezhda]

Okay, so I just wrote up the whole shabangle about "have to" and the 'correct' usage and how it evolved in popular speech and stuff, but then I deleted it because no one fucking cares.

English is crazy and doesn't make sense!  Poop in non-toilet receptacles!  Physically coercing Cain in a bathroom!

[El Twid]

[El Twid]

English isnt the only one though. For example in irish you have to use the word blue to describe someone of african descent. Reason being otherwise describing someone as a color refers to their hair color. By that logic my dad is black and i used to be brown and my grandfather used to be red.

[Emo Howard]

Going to the bathroom is mine!

[BadBeast]

I possess direction of singular imperative to room that has pipes for shit, not pipes for to do in washing.

[BadBeast]

English isnt the only one though. For example in irish you have to use the word blue to describe someone of african descent. Reason being otherwise describing someone as a color refers to their hair color. By that logic my dad is black and i used to be brown and my grandfather used to be red.

So are you "Shiny" in Irish now, or "Was Brown?"   

[stelz]

English isnt the only one though. For example in irish you have to use the word blue to describe someone of african descent. Reason being otherwise describing someone as a color refers to their hair color. By that logic my dad is black and i used to be brown and my grandfather used to be red.

Is that what they mean by "black Irish"???

[El Twid]

@badbeast- ta me maol anois.
@stelz- kinda. There is also a skin tone thing going on there though iirc. My dad does actually get mistaken for greek, morroccan and miscellaneous not irish until he talks.