Author Topic: A Really For Realz Holy Day.  (Read 1735 times)

Salty

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A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« on: November 26, 2011, 06:27:04 am »
As a recovering Catholic* and having left half a dozen (mebbe more than a dozen, actually) other religions behind before hitting the Brick Wall of Discordjia I have been left with this nagging ability to pick up on reverence.

Or something.

Nevermind that I seek out those too busy revering something, anything, to smell the pile of bullshit around them so as to shove their nose so deep in bullshit they can't see where theirs ends and mine begins. I look for reverence because I want it back sometimes. It is a comforting thing.

That lovely way everything and everyone stops what they're doing and chill. Humans, being worrisome little shits, need some reason to chill out. A picture or a story or, you know, something. They just shake LOOSE sometimes and let their humanity (and their genitals) show for a day or two. Sometimes people, civilized people, need to see blood.

Now, used to be, when the civilized folks did this they did so with food and booze and fucking and they still do. Only...that isn't good enough is it? It's not good enough because we, for the most part, have all that shit already. We've been able to shove out fat faces with so much for so long that it's boring. There's no thrill. We could be grateful, yeah. But to whom? Gawd? Well, yeah, I guess. 'Murrica? Fuckin' A. But that's a given.

So what now? What can we who have so much look to? What can we claw our way towards and achieve acquire? What can we yearn for now? TEEVEES, man. A God Damned Mother Fucking XBOX for a pittance. A teeming crowd of monkeys all looking to git some, a fucking FIGHT. Maybe, if we're lucky, a sacrifice.**

Christmas has tradition, sure. Thanksgiving has family and warmth and food. But they're a sham. Labor day? No one knows what the fuck it's for. Memorial day = fucking off with beer and steaks on the grill. Those are just Holidays.

Black Friday has RELIGION. It is America's Holy Day. Maybe the only one left.













*Note the capitalization. Old habits die hard.
**Don't tell me you didn't scan the news for death and were amused-but-ultimately-dissapointed with a measly pepper-spraying.
« Last Edit: November 26, 2011, 08:10:50 am by Alty »
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2011, 06:54:49 am »
http://news.nationalpost.com/2011/11/25/pepper-spraying-black-friday-shopper-was-fighting-for-cheap-xbox-police-say/

Quote
Pepper spraying woman still at large after Xbox melee

In Los Angeles, authorities were reviewing security tapes to track down a Hispanic woman in her 30s who pepper-sprayed a crowd at a Walmart as customers swarmed for Xboxes on sale late Thursday, Los Angeles police Sergeant J. Valle said.

“They were opening a package to try to get some Xboxes from a crate and this lady pepper-sprayed a whole bunch of people in order to gain an advantage over the Xboxes,” Sgt. Valle said.

Firefighters treated and released up to 20 people injured in the incident at a Walmart in Northridge, California, authorities said. It was not known whether the woman actually purchased the Xboxes, Sgt. Valle said.

A fire department spokesman told the Los Angeles Times that 20 people were treated for injuries from the incident, many complaining of burning in their throats and skin and eye irritations.

“People started screaming, pulling and pushing each other, and then the whole area filled up with pepper spray,” Alejandra Seminario told the Times.

“I did not want to get involved. I was too scared. I just stayed in the toy aisle.”


Holy shit.
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Salty

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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #2 on: November 26, 2011, 06:56:03 am »
I just laughed uncontrollably at work when I read that today.
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Freeky

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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #3 on: November 26, 2011, 07:54:32 am »
FUCKIN A CHRIST ALTY.  Good shit!
If someone does the “Fine, you’re right, I’m clearly a terrible person, I’m Satan, I’m the worst person alive, I should just die” thing in response to criticism of their harmful behavior, they are trying to manipulate people and flip the situation around so that they look like a victim.

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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #4 on: November 26, 2011, 08:24:08 am »
Sometimes I revere mere existence. Other times I revere causality. Other times, my senses.
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Salty

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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #5 on: November 26, 2011, 08:29:55 am »
Thanks.

Just the name of it. Black Friday. It beats the everloving hell out of Good Friday. It sounds ominous and brutal and permanent. Can you imagine what Black Friday will be like 50 years from now?

Savage.

Ultibuy employees will draw lots and one will be tied to four stakes in the ground in front of the store to await the stampede of hyper-caffeinated deal enthusiasts. Each shopper will be required to bring their own weaponry, no firearms will be permitted but someone will invariable break the rules. Those who try to break away from the mob will be flayed to appease the great Technology Gods. People who only want to sleep in will be ripped from their beds, beaten, and left as the scraps offered to those who fought but failed to acquire discounted televisions for they will have no other source of entertainment.

Sometimes I revere mere existence. Other times I revere causality. Other times, my senses.

I DON'T revere. I enjoy. I lust after things and stuff. I experience. But I avoid reverence because I don't understand its purpose other than to glorify, and that seems to always lead to getting lost.
« Last Edit: November 26, 2011, 08:33:21 am by Alty »
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Salty

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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #6 on: November 26, 2011, 08:48:54 am »
The closest I come to reverence is on clear days where I see the sun shining perfectly on the mountains, or when I have the ability to realize they are just as majestic when obscured by dense clouds. It's easy to realize the greatness of things when they're easily seen, but perspective does not lessen greatness.

I get the same feeling in the woods. Or the one time I was in a desert. Anything that makes humans look small, I suppose.

Does that make me a hippy? I don't really care if it does.
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #7 on: November 26, 2011, 09:05:17 am »
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=142791143

Mars? I would say: Punctuates, but that's just me.
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #8 on: November 26, 2011, 01:26:07 pm »
The closest I come to reverence is on clear days where I see the sun shining perfectly on the mountains, or when I have the ability to realize they are just as majestic when obscured by dense clouds. It's easy to realize the greatness of things when they're easily seen, but perspective does not lessen greatness.

I get the same feeling in the woods. Or the one time I was in a desert. Anything that makes humans look small, I suppose.

Does that make me a hippy? I don't really care if it does.

I actually enjoy the hell out of the same thought process. I think it's awesome.

I'll never forget the first time I was hundreds of miles from any significant source of light pollution on a perfectly clear night and saw the full terrible beauty of the Milky Way. Sometimes I imagine an instant destruction of our atmosphere during the day by a giant solar flare or something, and think to myself, to look at the lower part of where the sky would be if I want to catch a glimpse of the galaxy before I get annihilated by radiation.

It's always good to be prepared, you know?


http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=142791143

Mars? I would say: Punctuates, but that's just me.

I read it as:

Violence, Mars, Black Friday Shopping

A Martian invader has been connected to the yearly buying season known to scientists as the "glomp fungus". According to astrofungucist, Dr. Pam Famplin, the glomeromycota productus spores are activated intermittently throughout the year by neutrino blast cycles emanating from deep inside the red planet. "It's completely harmless to human beings, neutrinos just pass through everything all the time," Famplin said, adding that "therapeutic business applications are currently being beta tested by Econoceuticals™ International to help get us out of this recession."

The glomp fungus causes an insatiable desire to earn more money in several double blind studies that have been conducted around the world. The regular neutrino emissions from Mars temporarily reverse the fungal polarities, shifting the urge to earn into a temporary but powerful drive to spend. It naturally inhabits the dank outer walls of large box stores and can travel hundreds of miles during the peak season. Naturally occurring colonies have been monitored for years, however Dr. Famplin could not disclose how long this research has gone on citing confidentiality agreements. Sources talking on condition of anonymity confirmed that the fungus does indeed come from Mars, and that the neutrino pulses appear to be generated by an underground superorganism, thought to be the living origin of the nearly identical species found on Earth.

Unfortunately, the glomp fungus populations have been dropping considerably for reasons not well understood. Econoceuticals™ hopes to gain FDA approval for Buynaids™—a synthetic form of the active components found in the fungus—before the declining numbers of the organism damage the economy any further. The new drug may cause a slight increase in violence, suicide, oily discharge, and bestiality but is expected to hit the market soon. Ask your doctor to put you on the waitlist for Buynaids™ today for a wealthier tomorrow.
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #9 on: November 26, 2011, 01:30:28 pm »
http://news.nationalpost.com/2011/11/25/pepper-spraying-black-friday-shopper-was-fighting-for-cheap-xbox-police-say/

Quote
Pepper spraying woman still at large after Xbox melee

In Los Angeles, authorities were reviewing security tapes to track down a Hispanic woman in her 30s who pepper-sprayed a crowd at a Walmart as customers swarmed for Xboxes on sale late Thursday, Los Angeles police Sergeant J. Valle said.

“They were opening a package to try to get some Xboxes from a crate and this lady pepper-sprayed a whole bunch of people in order to gain an advantage over the Xboxes,” Sgt. Valle said.

Firefighters treated and released up to 20 people injured in the incident at a Walmart in Northridge, California, authorities said. It was not known whether the woman actually purchased the Xboxes, Sgt. Valle said.

A fire department spokesman told the Los Angeles Times that 20 people were treated for injuries from the incident, many complaining of burning in their throats and skin and eye irritations.

“People started screaming, pulling and pushing each other, and then the whole area filled up with pepper spray,” Alejandra Seminario told the Times.

“I did not want to get involved. I was too scared. I just stayed in the toy aisle.”


Holy shit.

Where do people get these ideas, that it's just fine to casually pepperspray people in the face if they're in your way??

There must be some societal factor that's setting a bad example making people think this is the way they should deal with crowds behaving in a manner inconsistent with their interests... Videogames? No ... but what could it be? :?
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #10 on: November 26, 2011, 04:18:14 pm »
http://news.nationalpost.com/2011/11/25/pepper-spraying-black-friday-shopper-was-fighting-for-cheap-xbox-police-say/

Quote
Pepper spraying woman still at large after Xbox melee

In Los Angeles, authorities were reviewing security tapes to track down a Hispanic woman in her 30s who pepper-sprayed a crowd at a Walmart as customers swarmed for Xboxes on sale late Thursday, Los Angeles police Sergeant J. Valle said.

“They were opening a package to try to get some Xboxes from a crate and this lady pepper-sprayed a whole bunch of people in order to gain an advantage over the Xboxes,” Sgt. Valle said.

Firefighters treated and released up to 20 people injured in the incident at a Walmart in Northridge, California, authorities said. It was not known whether the woman actually purchased the Xboxes, Sgt. Valle said.

A fire department spokesman told the Los Angeles Times that 20 people were treated for injuries from the incident, many complaining of burning in their throats and skin and eye irritations.

“People started screaming, pulling and pushing each other, and then the whole area filled up with pepper spray,” Alejandra Seminario told the Times.

“I did not want to get involved. I was too scared. I just stayed in the toy aisle.”


Holy shit.

Where do people get these ideas, that it's just fine to casually pepperspray people in the face if they're in your way??

There must be some societal factor that's setting a bad example making people think this is the way they should deal with crowds behaving in a manner inconsistent with their interests... Videogames? No ... but what could it be? :?

Every bit of media is telling people to treat Black Friday as a consumerist war zone, in which the person who gets the best deals destroys all others. Go check Youtube for "black friday ads", especially for Target. And if you don't understand after that, you may just be too European to understand.
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #11 on: November 26, 2011, 06:50:41 pm »
It horrifies me. Every year, people get KILLED on Black Friday. Over buying some shit.

OK, I looked up some of the "doorbuster" deals at Best Buy, because I heard that a couple had camped for four days in front of a Best Buy to buy a widescreen TV.

Four days.

Now, for me, this would equal $1200 in lost productivity. I am going to assume that they have jobs, because WTF are they doing buying a giant TV if they're not employed?

There were two "deals" it could have been. One was a 42" TV for $199, and the other was a 55" TV for $999. A little more looking and I found 42" TVs from about $400 to about $500, and 55" TVs from about $800 to about $1400.

So, AT MOST, this couple may have saved $400. Completely disregarding the fact that electronics always go on sale after Christmas and they could probably stroll into an empty store and buy one for even less at their leisure, or even order one online and get free shipping and never even waste their time going to the mall, let's look at the difference between four days of lost work for two people, (not to mention not even having Thanksgiving with their friends and family!) even if they only make $8/hour (in which case, again, WTF are they spending a thousand dollars on a TV for?)

That would be lost wages of about $500. To save $400. On a TV they could just wait a few weeks to buy for less without missing any work.



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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #12 on: November 26, 2011, 08:11:44 pm »
The closest I come to reverence is on clear days where I see the sun shining perfectly on the mountains, or when I have the ability to realize they are just as majestic when obscured by dense clouds. It's easy to realize the greatness of things when they're easily seen, but perspective does not lessen greatness.

I get the same feeling in the woods. Or the one time I was in a desert. Anything that makes humans look small, I suppose.

Does that make me a hippy? I don't really care if it does.
Another ex-Catholic who feels the same way. It's why I love the South West so much. There's so many places where that's the feeling and it's exhilarating and wonderful and reminds me I'm one tiny spark of life in an incredibly vast universe.

And I was also thinking about this, pretty much the same way. Shopping malls (and especially old department stores) are prettier than most (Protestant) churches I've ever been in.
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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #13 on: November 26, 2011, 11:11:59 pm »
Where do people get these ideas, that it's just fine to casually pepperspray people in the face if they're in your way??

There must be some societal factor that's setting a bad example making people think this is the way they should deal with crowds behaving in a manner inconsistent with their interests... Videogames? No ... but what could it be? :?

Every bit of media is telling people to treat Black Friday as a consumerist war zone, in which the person who gets the best deals destroys all others. Go check Youtube for "black friday ads", especially for Target. And if you don't understand after that, you may just be too European to understand.

Nonono, I know what "black friday" is :) (though I admit I don't understand it ;-) )

I was trying to go for a play on blaming violent videogames for setting a bad example, instead blaming certain policemen and their way of dealing with crowds for setting the bad example, seems casually pepperspraying people is all the hype this winter!

It horrifies me. Every year, people get KILLED on Black Friday. Over buying some shit.

OK, I looked up some of the "doorbuster" deals at Best Buy, because I heard that a couple had camped for four days in front of a Best Buy to buy a widescreen TV.

Four days.

Now, for me, this would equal $1200 in lost productivity. I am going to assume that they have jobs, because WTF are they doing buying a giant TV if they're not employed?

There were two "deals" it could have been. One was a 42" TV for $199, and the other was a 55" TV for $999. A little more looking and I found 42" TVs from about $400 to about $500, and 55" TVs from about $800 to about $1400.

So, AT MOST, this couple may have saved $400. Completely disregarding the fact that electronics always go on sale after Christmas and they could probably stroll into an empty store and buy one for even less at their leisure, or even order one online and get free shipping and never even waste their time going to the mall, let's look at the difference between four days of lost work for two people, (not to mention not even having Thanksgiving with their friends and family!) even if they only make $8/hour (in which case, again, WTF are they spending a thousand dollars on a TV for?)

That would be lost wages of about $500. To save $400. On a TV they could just wait a few weeks to buy for less without missing any work.

Wasn't it Dimo that needed a good argument/example of how advertising can actually harm people?

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Re: A Really For Realz Holy Day.
« Reply #14 on: November 27, 2011, 04:50:26 pm »
I'm still kind of surprised that Black Friday has become a marketing gimmick.

Do I remember it incorrectly or wasn't the term basically coined by people who work in retail trying to convey how much it sucks to work in retail?  Especially during the Christmas rush.
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