Author Topic: Fifth World Problems  (Read 6826 times)

navkat

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #15 on: January 31, 2012, 12:19:47 pm »
My clone is filing a lawsuit against me for my bad genes.  :sad:

I think my garbage disposal and my dishwasher are having an affair. You would not believe the noises coming out of the kitchen.

My parents won't let me get genetic recoding! How am I meant to express my individuality without gills?  :x

My replicator is broken and now everything it makes tastes like bratwurst. Anyone got some spare toothpaste?

The line at the teleporter is awful, its going to take me at least five minutes to get to work.

Someone linked me to a picture of the sun going supernova. Ugh! Spoilers!

These are brilliant.

Cainad (dec.)

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #16 on: February 10, 2012, 04:35:51 am »
bump

source

"I microwaved my time cube, and now I'm stuck in temporal displacement where The Phantom Menace is being released every 13 years. Please help."



My own brainfarts:

I applied the new rapid evolutionary algorithms to my liver yesterday so I could drink all night. Now I'm hung over and my liver is suing for independence.

Apparently my future self will think it's simply hilarious to send me cryptic text messages right before major life events.

Telarus

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #17 on: February 10, 2012, 08:29:10 am »
Apparently my future self will think it's simply hilarious to send me cryptic text messages right before major life events.

Thank you Agent, your contribution has been added to the central One Line MemeBomb Database.
« Last Edit: February 10, 2012, 08:31:32 am by Telarus »
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Cainad (dec.)

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #18 on: February 10, 2012, 07:26:43 pm »
:banana:

Telarus

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Telarus, KSC,
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/||\   Episkopos of the Amorphous Dreams Cabal

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Forsooth

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #20 on: December 05, 2012, 03:43:29 pm »
Love the one about Virginians.

Pergamos

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #21 on: December 29, 2012, 12:26:24 am »
Somebody uploaded a pirate copy of me and my co-workers have been wanking to wet dreams I haven't even had yet.  Can I sue them for spoilering?

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #22 on: December 29, 2012, 02:00:00 am »
You don't have problems.  I have problems.

My clone is cheating on me again.   :cry:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
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- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

AFK

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #23 on: December 29, 2012, 03:30:46 am »
I'm all out of Oxi-Clean anomaly scrubbing pads.
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #24 on: December 29, 2012, 03:34:54 am »
I woke up in a loop. Again.  :sad:
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Salty

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #25 on: December 29, 2012, 08:17:25 pm »
Every time I shove cats into the food recycler I get borscht. Not okay.
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Pæs

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #26 on: January 16, 2013, 08:52:00 pm »
I signed up at hirley0's forum and logged into 2013. How do I get home?

navkat

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #27 on: March 06, 2013, 10:56:18 pm »
My kid's out of diapers but the GPS is broken on my microchip so I totally won't be allowed to buy any until I get a new one inserted on Tuesday. :(

It's totally sweet that the family I clean for lets me have their dog's leftover filet mignon and I don't mean to sound ungrateful but I wish they'd refrigerate it if it's going to be sitting out more than an hour or two. :(

I didn't get the job at the bottling plant. Yeah, some things in my purchase history and internet browsing popped positive for lost time/excessive breaks risk and I just can't afford the $90 internship fee to prove my efficiency for three weeks. :(

LMNO

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #28 on: March 07, 2013, 03:16:00 pm »
Holy shit.  That was perfect.

navkat

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Re: Fifth World Problems
« Reply #29 on: March 07, 2013, 06:02:23 pm »