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Author Topic: Love Poems to my Wife  (Read 1677 times)

The Good Reverend Roger

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Love Poems to my Wife
« on: February 16, 2012, 05:21:58 pm »
1st off, some Haiku

Come over here, woman
That Ru Paul on TV has
Done got me Horny

Ow shit stop it ouch
Son of a bitch that hurt bad
Um, do it again

(On the occasion of forgetting an anniversary)

I am but a man
I cannot remember shit
Take off your shirt, please

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Quote from: Doktor Howl
McDonalds, if you think about it, is the PERFECT example of life/lifestyles in the late 20th/early 21st century. Pink slime shaped like chicken nuggets, giant lawsuit-happy corporations suing people for using the prefix "Mc" no matter what the circumstances, marketing aimed at small children (Ronald, etc) to form life-long associations with the product, and the abysmally-effective "I'M LOVING IT" marketing ploy aimed at maintaining that association into the person's adult life...With the advertisement showing skinny, attractive people while in reality the AVERAGE customer is 45 pounds overweight.

All style, no substance almost-food sold to brainwashed masses. It's AMERICA™, in a white paper bag.

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #1 on: February 16, 2012, 05:30:45 pm »
Fetch the pry bar, Jenn
My ass hair has woven me
Shut down there AGAIN

Still mad from last week
Then she smacked my bitch up
Again (I crave it)
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Quote from: Doktor Howl
McDonalds, if you think about it, is the PERFECT example of life/lifestyles in the late 20th/early 21st century. Pink slime shaped like chicken nuggets, giant lawsuit-happy corporations suing people for using the prefix "Mc" no matter what the circumstances, marketing aimed at small children (Ronald, etc) to form life-long associations with the product, and the abysmally-effective "I'M LOVING IT" marketing ploy aimed at maintaining that association into the person's adult life...With the advertisement showing skinny, attractive people while in reality the AVERAGE customer is 45 pounds overweight.

All style, no substance almost-food sold to brainwashed masses. It's AMERICA™, in a white paper bag.

Luna

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #2 on: February 16, 2012, 06:15:01 pm »
Pure magic, those.  She has to be a hell of a woman to put up wi... er... to have attracted you.
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"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 pm
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 am
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #3 on: February 16, 2012, 06:15:21 pm »
Quote from: Luna on February 16, 2012, 06:15:01 pm
Pure magic, those.  She has to be a hell of a woman to put up wi... er... to have attracted you.

I am the last of the true romantics.
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Quote from: Doktor Howl
McDonalds, if you think about it, is the PERFECT example of life/lifestyles in the late 20th/early 21st century. Pink slime shaped like chicken nuggets, giant lawsuit-happy corporations suing people for using the prefix "Mc" no matter what the circumstances, marketing aimed at small children (Ronald, etc) to form life-long associations with the product, and the abysmally-effective "I'M LOVING IT" marketing ploy aimed at maintaining that association into the person's adult life...With the advertisement showing skinny, attractive people while in reality the AVERAGE customer is 45 pounds overweight.

All style, no substance almost-food sold to brainwashed masses. It's AMERICA™, in a white paper bag.

Luna

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #4 on: February 16, 2012, 06:58:42 pm »
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 06:15:21 pm
Quote from: Luna on February 16, 2012, 06:15:01 pm
Pure magic, those.  She has to be a hell of a woman to put up wi... er... to have attracted you.

I am the last of the true romantics.

Presented with gems such as these, I confess, I would be speechless with... something.
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"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 pm
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 am
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #5 on: February 16, 2012, 07:45:03 pm »
Quote from: Luna on February 16, 2012, 06:58:42 pm
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 06:15:21 pm
Quote from: Luna on February 16, 2012, 06:15:01 pm
Pure magic, those.  She has to be a hell of a woman to put up wi... er... to have attracted you.

I am the last of the true romantics.

Presented with gems such as these, I confess, I would be speechless with... something.

My wife is 39 years old.  The fact that I find her to be insanely sexy (and I do, because she is, and 39 isn't anywhere near as old as she thinks it is), and that I'm vocal about it, seems to mitigate my crass behavior to a great degree.
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Quote from: Doktor Howl
McDonalds, if you think about it, is the PERFECT example of life/lifestyles in the late 20th/early 21st century. Pink slime shaped like chicken nuggets, giant lawsuit-happy corporations suing people for using the prefix "Mc" no matter what the circumstances, marketing aimed at small children (Ronald, etc) to form life-long associations with the product, and the abysmally-effective "I'M LOVING IT" marketing ploy aimed at maintaining that association into the person's adult life...With the advertisement showing skinny, attractive people while in reality the AVERAGE customer is 45 pounds overweight.

All style, no substance almost-food sold to brainwashed masses. It's AMERICA™, in a white paper bag.

Luna

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #6 on: February 16, 2012, 09:31:55 pm »
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 07:45:03 pm
Quote from: Luna on February 16, 2012, 06:58:42 pm
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 06:15:21 pm
Quote from: Luna on February 16, 2012, 06:15:01 pm
Pure magic, those.  She has to be a hell of a woman to put up wi... er... to have attracted you.

I am the last of the true romantics.

Presented with gems such as these, I confess, I would be speechless with... something.

My wife is 39 years old.  The fact that I find her to be insanely sexy (and I do, because she is, and 39 isn't anywhere near as old as she thinks it is), and that I'm vocal about it, seems to mitigate my crass behavior to a great degree.

That would, in fact, buy anybody a lot of slack.   :) 
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"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 pm
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 am
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

M. Nigel Salt

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #7 on: February 16, 2012, 10:07:16 pm »
 :lol: Oh, Roger. She is a lucky woman.

For a certain value of "lucky".
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Don Coyote

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #8 on: February 16, 2012, 10:22:34 pm »
I believe I am firmly in the TGRR school of wooing women. You are a poet and saint.
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The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #9 on: February 16, 2012, 11:01:57 pm »
Quote from: Nigel on February 16, 2012, 10:07:16 pm
:lol: Oh, Roger. She is a lucky woman.

For a certain value of "lucky".

Her comment:  "You're a dumbfuck, but you make me laugh."

:banana:
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Quote from: Doktor Howl
McDonalds, if you think about it, is the PERFECT example of life/lifestyles in the late 20th/early 21st century. Pink slime shaped like chicken nuggets, giant lawsuit-happy corporations suing people for using the prefix "Mc" no matter what the circumstances, marketing aimed at small children (Ronald, etc) to form life-long associations with the product, and the abysmally-effective "I'M LOVING IT" marketing ploy aimed at maintaining that association into the person's adult life...With the advertisement showing skinny, attractive people while in reality the AVERAGE customer is 45 pounds overweight.

All style, no substance almost-food sold to brainwashed masses. It's AMERICA™, in a white paper bag.

Luna

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #10 on: February 17, 2012, 05:34:20 am »
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on February 16, 2012, 11:01:57 pm
Quote from: Nigel on February 16, 2012, 10:07:16 pm
:lol: Oh, Roger. She is a lucky woman.

For a certain value of "lucky".

Her comment:  "You're a dumbfuck, but you make me laugh."

:banana:

From the right lady, that's high praise.   :)
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Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
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"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 pm
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 am
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Cramulus

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2012, 05:02:02 pm »
powerful. mysterious. erotic.



no seriously though, those are great. Needs a sappy comic-sans style treatment!

Come over here, woman
That Ru Paul on TV has
Done got me Horny

Ow shit stop it ouch
Son of a bitch that hurt bad
Um, do it again

I am but a man
I cannot remember shit
Take off your shirt, please
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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #12 on: February 20, 2012, 09:19:28 pm »
Wow. What a stud. You taught your boy this sort of thing, yeah? I'd hate to think you hadn't passed this on.
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The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #13 on: October 19, 2012, 04:25:32 pm »
Yes I know that our
Guests arrive in ten minutes
let's get nekkid now

I know your eyes are
way up there, but I wasn't
looking at your eyes

Inappropriate?
So neighbor lady says but
It's our Goddamn yard
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Quote from: Doktor Howl
McDonalds, if you think about it, is the PERFECT example of life/lifestyles in the late 20th/early 21st century. Pink slime shaped like chicken nuggets, giant lawsuit-happy corporations suing people for using the prefix "Mc" no matter what the circumstances, marketing aimed at small children (Ronald, etc) to form life-long associations with the product, and the abysmally-effective "I'M LOVING IT" marketing ploy aimed at maintaining that association into the person's adult life...With the advertisement showing skinny, attractive people while in reality the AVERAGE customer is 45 pounds overweight.

All style, no substance almost-food sold to brainwashed masses. It's AMERICA™, in a white paper bag.

stelz

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Re: Love Poems to my Wife
« Reply #14 on: October 19, 2012, 06:40:35 pm »
Move over, Songs of Solomon.  :lulz:
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