Author Topic: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)  (Read 1508 times)

Nephew Twiddleton

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Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« on: March 30, 2012, 01:04:18 am »
Chapter 1:

To the Church of New England, and under certain circumstances, New York:

Brothers and sisters, we are weak. The whole of us brought together size that of an average European country, yet we see little of each other, except in our own cities. And I don't know about Providence, but we get little of that here in Boston. Some of you are rare to be seen here on the forums. Some of you have not been seen in many an age. Some of us have flounced completely. We are numerous! Why do we not have time for each other? Though there shall be a mini-meet up soon, and a larger one a little after, why must we wait on these? I recognize that I am just as at fault. It is easy enough for me to make a pilgrimmage to the Holy City of Providence, and it is easy enough for the people of Providence to make a pilgrimmage to the Holy City of Boston (those of you in TRONE are exempt due to your remoteness, even though it's not that remote. The Meese are dangerous, and we expect not to risk your own lives for our entertainment). And yet we are divided by a seemingly insurmountable gulf, but once a year. This must end.

Nay, the proximity and shared weirdness of both Boston and Providence, and their outlying territories, should encourage us to meet up more! It is not as if we are far-flung. On the contrary! I have coworkers who live in Providence! The drive is but an hour! The weekends are 48 hours long! Our weirdness should be shared. Too long has it been since I have seen even LMNO, Luna and Suu! Even longer still since I have seen Richter, Dimo and Eve! Longer still since I have seen Pope Tom, even though that was only once and he only pops in now and again.

Let us not be disheartened that this year we shall have no Doktor Howl, nor TGG and Enabler, nor Phox. Let this encourage our hearts to band together even stronger, schedules be damned, intermittent posting be damned, fluncing be damned! Our land is a strange one. Let us celebrate it together! Let us live up to the envy that the Northeast seems to inspire! Let us make fun for others to miss out on!

Penance: One Sour Father, Three Hail Erises and Two Gory Be's.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #1 on: March 30, 2012, 01:07:18 am »
Also, obviously, Cainad, leln, Cramulus, Gogira and EoC are included in that.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2012, 01:25:11 am »
Chapter 2:

An Epistle to the Holy City of Tucson:

Tucsonites, I give warm greetings from my Nepostery! Every day I read the news your land fills me with horrormirth, and I regret the aborted attempt for Villager and I to visit, and thank Doktor for his encouragement to carry on despite the Howl family's inability to visit us this year. Tucson truly is a black hole that lets none escape. Perhaps next year, Villager and I will make it out to the wasteland you call permanent squatting land, and meet Freeky as well.

I know that the recent scourge of F5 has weighed heavily upon ye. But despair not! These things come and go, and despite PD being in somewhat of a lull, I sense an upswing. Sun rise and sunset and all that rot. That spag from New Jersey once said "only the names will change" over an acoustic twelve string. Though some may flounce, others will come. And as the wave of my own arrival showed, not all newbs are transient.

Though the spider is strong, and her threads even stronger, even a web may be broken, or better yet burned. Not all venoms are fatal.

Better times will come, and perseverance will guide the way.

Penance:

Cheap whiskey at the Meetrack, with Johnny Cash on the jukebox. 2 nights indulgence.<---not to get you out of purgatory. That's your sentence.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #3 on: March 30, 2012, 01:31:21 am »
Response Epistles more than welcome.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #4 on: March 30, 2012, 02:41:37 am »
So... is this a flop?
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Chairman Risus

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #5 on: March 30, 2012, 03:15:06 am »
This is not a well traveled part of the forum, give it some time.
As for responses, hit up the loosely affiliated South Eastern members, and I'll see if I can work on something.

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #6 on: March 30, 2012, 03:16:51 am »
This is not a well traveled part of the forum, give it some time.
As for responses, hit up the loosely affiliated South Eastern members, and I'll see if I can work on something.

Oh, I was going to get to you guys, but the holiness dissipated and I realized that I have to do the Waffle Iron comic.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Q. G. Pennyworth

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #7 on: March 30, 2012, 05:16:07 am »
You know I'm down, man.

Sorry I don't have more Holiness for a response.
Overheating Pheremone Pustule of Last Saturday's Jiggle Fun| _xgeWireToEvent: Unknown extension 131, this should never happen.

Don't fucking judge me, I've got tentacles for a face.

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2012, 05:20:27 am »
You know I'm down, man.

Sorry I don't have more Holiness for a response.

It's all good. Plus, you're in on Saturday, so it's all good.

Funny enough, I think it was when I had been posting as long as you have when I first met LMNO and Dimo, but I may be mistaken in that regard. I was still considered a noob at the time at any rate.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

Nephew Twiddleton

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2012, 05:21:08 am »
I said it's all good twice.

Man, I'm more tired than I thought.
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

TIM AM I, PRIMARY OF THE EXTRA-ATMOSPHERIC SIMIANS

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #10 on: March 30, 2012, 05:35:21 am »
I said it's all good twice.

Man, I'm more tired than I thought.

Sleep and/or drink more.
Overheating Pheremone Pustule of Last Saturday's Jiggle Fun| _xgeWireToEvent: Unknown extension 131, this should never happen.

Don't fucking judge me, I've got tentacles for a face.

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #11 on: March 30, 2012, 05:39:41 am »
I said it's all good twice.

Man, I'm more tired than I thought.

Sleep and/or drink more.

I'll do a little of one and more of the other.

And for once the little of one is the drinking. But only because I generally need a vegging out period if I do a bit of braining before bedtime. The comic thread takes a bit out of me. I need to spread it out more workwise.
Steely-Eyed Replicant Frottage Master of Yesterday's Lost Glory
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Soy El Vaquero Peludo de Oro

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AFK

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Re: Twid's Epistles to the Churches of Discordia (Holy Book 1)
« Reply #12 on: March 30, 2012, 01:24:31 pm »
Response Epistle (which I keep in a drawer right next to my e-cig)

Chapped Her 1:

To the left honorable Nephew Twiddleton and any other associated persons of interest:

Tidings of greetings and good morrows and all of that kind of jive from the Land of TRONE.

Thank you for you consideration in your Epistle to New England.  Indeed, as much as we would enjoy a great pilgrimage to the Southern Regions, we regrettably must hold our ground here within our Tree Village encampments. 

The Meese have indeed been particularly vigorous these days in their travels amongst the perimeter.  It is almost as though the mighty hand of God came down and roided them all up, and then super glued huge formidable racks.  (And who would be brave enough to tangle with formidable racks?)  Our armaments have dwindled as we fend off the fell beasts to keep them our of our larders and our compost mounds. 

In fact, if you could be a dear and send us some extra barriers that would be outstanding.  It appears that even electrified fences aren't doing the trick.  Maybe some cement blocks?  Or maybe just something to dope them up.

It is with much hope that this message finds you in good spirits, well health, and unburdened by high-interest debt. 

Toodles and howdy-do's.

Penance:

Two Abbots and Five Costellos, and a Laurel Hardy for good measure. 



Cynicism is a blank check for failure.