Mangrove and the absence thereof

[Mangrove]

Here's why I haven't been posting as much.

It's not that I don't have the time. I have plenty of time. In fact, I have too much time which is why I don't post often. Because I'm self employed, I have to use my brain to build my business. Mrs Mang' & I squeak by financially most of the time, so it's really way more important that I find clients and establish my practice because she works way too hard for too little money from total assholes. Until we find other jobs and/or other sources of income (we're both actively working on that), we just get on with being held to ransom because I like making mortgage payments and I like the fact that this is the only way we can afford healthcare. It won't always be that way, but right now, it IS.

Secondly, since 2007, we've been dealing with the hilarious family game called 'living with a junky'. The drugs, the withdrawal, the relapses (oh the relapses!) ,the police interviews, doctor appointments, court appointments, taking time out of your day to find out which pawn shop your jewelry is in. The lies, the denial, the arguments, the weird behaviors, the lack of trust, the siege mentality of being at home, the endless fucking discussions with friends/family/work mates....

Well, turns out all of this is very time consuming and not very interesting either.  Which is precisely why until today, I have not talked about this at PD because I really didn't see any good coming from it. So this is probably the only post where I'll mention it. Unless something significant and newsworthy happens, that's it. Just so everyone knows and wonders why my creative energies have not been in Komedy Kabbalah of late.

As for creative things, I did manage to unplug a serious creative block that kept me from bothering with music for over a decade. Back to playing guitar again regularly. [Incidentally, I have found a positive purpose arising out of shows like American Idol. The moment I hear or see it on tv I think "Cool, now I can spend the next 1-2 hours working on my own shit rather than listen to people I don't care about." ]

When I first joined PD, I had a really stupid, stressful but stable job. Now I have a really cool job that I love but where the income stream is unreliable. I answer to pretty much no one but myself, but that also means the sole responsibility of success or failure falls squarely on my head. I've got a lot of study, lots of practice and a shit load of marketing to do. Not to mention, a lot of soul searching too. Perhaps when my work calendar is a lot more full, then I'll have the time to engage with what's going on here. But right now, it's something I can only briefly glance at.

I'm still around but horribly out of the loop and that's how it has to be right now.


Until then, relax - it's only the internet.

Mangrove

[Doktor Howl]

Secondly, since 2007, we've been dealing with the hilarious family game called 'living with a junky'.

Ouch.

[Mangrove]

Well, I thought I could get some comedy/rant out of it. But really all I do is sigh and prepare mentally for round 4 or 5 or whatever we're up to.

[Doktor Howl]

Well, I thought I could get some comedy/rant out of it. But really all I do is sigh and prepare mentally for round 4 or 5 or whatever we're up to.

Yeah, some things just aren't funny.  Being in that situation is one of them.

[Mangrove]

Well, I thought I could get some comedy/rant out of it. But really all I do is sigh and prepare mentally for round 4 or 5 or whatever we're up to.

Yeah, some things just aren't funny.  Being in that situation is one of them.

I think it's too soon. Perhaps with enough time/distance...I dunno. It does produce occasional moments of passive aggressive brilliance. Like:

{phone rings}

Mrs Mang: Hello?
Addict: Is...uhh...****** there?
Mrs Mang: No, sorry. He's out scoring with your friend *****.
Addict: Ummm.....er....thanks?

[Deepthroat Chopra]

I had the same once. I felt compelled to be the one to keep him off the streets. I even tolerated a few CD's going missing here and there, and other associated trouble. The last straw, after a long series of straws, was when he ran a bath, and then went off on the nod, flooding our living room and hallway carpets. wound up the household, lost my bond, and wished the selfish bastard well in his new life without me in it.

Reeks of inevitability. Not giving advice or anything, just saying I think I get it.

[Misery's Fried Dough]

Here's why I haven't been posting as much.

It's not that I don't have the time. I have plenty of time. In fact, I have too much time which is why I don't post often. Because I'm self employed, I have to use my brain to build my business. Mrs Mang' & I squeak by financially most of the time, so it's really way more important that I find clients and establish my practice because she works way too hard for too little money from total assholes. Until we find other jobs and/or other sources of income (we're both actively working on that), we just get on with being held to ransom because I like making mortgage payments and I like the fact that this is the only way we can afford healthcare. It won't always be that way, but right now, it IS.

Secondly, since 2007, we've been dealing with the hilarious family game called 'living with a junky'. The drugs, the withdrawal, the relapses (oh the relapses!) ,the police interviews, doctor appointments, court appointments, taking time out of your day to find out which pawn shop your jewelry is in. The lies, the denial, the arguments, the weird behaviors, the lack of trust, the siege mentality of being at home, the endless fucking discussions with friends/family/work mates....

Well, turns out all of this is very time consuming and not very interesting either.  Which is precisely why until today, I have not talked about this at PD because I really didn't see any good coming from it. So this is probably the only post where I'll mention it. Unless something significant and newsworthy happens, that's it. Just so everyone knows and wonders why my creative energies have not been in Komedy Kabbalah of late.

As for creative things, I did manage to unplug a serious creative block that kept me from bothering with music for over a decade. Back to playing guitar again regularly. [Incidentally, I have found a positive purpose arising out of shows like American Idol. The moment I hear or see it on tv I think "Cool, now I can spend the next 1-2 hours working on my own shit rather than listen to people I don't care about." ]

When I first joined PD, I had a really stupid, stressful but stable job. Now I have a really cool job that I love but where the income stream is unreliable. I answer to pretty much no one but myself, but that also means the sole responsibility of success or failure falls squarely on my head. I've got a lot of study, lots of practice and a shit load of marketing to do. Not to mention, a lot of soul searching too. Perhaps when my work calendar is a lot more full, then I'll have the time to engage with what's going on here. But right now, it's something I can only briefly glance at.

I'm still around but horribly out of the loop and that's how it has to be right now.


Until then, relax - it's only the internet.

Mangrove

It's good to have you around Mang, even if it's occassional.
 
This is where I want to say something that is supportive but doesn't come off cheesy and trite.
 
Take care good sir. 

[M. Nigel Salt]

Mang!

I'm sorry to hear about the shit you're dealing with.

[stelz]

I had the same once. I felt compelled to be the one to keep him off the streets. I even tolerated a few CD's going missing here and there, and other associated trouble. The last straw, after a long series of straws, was when he ran a bath, and then went off on the nod, flooding our living room and hallway carpets. wound up the household, lost my bond, and wished the selfish bastard well in his new life without me in it.

Reeks of inevitability. Not giving advice or anything, just saying I think I get it.

This. They seem to stay that way until they're about fifty, if they live. I know old guys who have been off it for a good while. Young ones, not for long. Take care and cut your losses if it gets to be too much.

[LMNO, PhD (life continues)]

Thanks for checking in, Mang.  Hope the situation you're in doesn't put your nose out of joint.

[Mangrove]

Thank you for the words of support everyone. I do appreciate it.

Sometimes, talking about a problem makes you feel 'unburdened'. However, the more one does repeated 'sharing', the less liberating it feels until, you turn into that person that people avoid. "Oh god, if I have to hear another drug story, I'm gonna scream."

Anyways, I opted for keeping it off PD.com. Maybe that was the right thing to do, maybe not. I dunno to be honest.

As for being out of the loop. I am so out of the loop over the last few years, I missed the entire AKK drama. I only found out about it after the fact!

Then I checked in to find that Babalon Horuv was the forum pariah for something I am not entirely aware of, though I gathered from inference that it was something really creepy.

There's probably a whole bunch of other fights I'm missed out on too. Plus there's posters I don't recognize. Some of them might be new and some of them are probably people I already know but I haven't been updated on moniker changes.

It occurred to me also that, since 2004 I have never once attempted to change my avatar pic.

[El Twid]

Babylon became a pariah as a result of introducing his strange sexual predilections to us with his offhanded remark about writing and enjoying snuff stories.

[navkat: navkat of...navkat!]

FLOUNCE CABAL REPRUHSENT.

I'm sending a whole pack of thetans and a gently-used internets yuor way, mang.

[Mangrove]

Babylon became a pariah as a result of introducing his strange sexual predilections to us with his offhanded remark about writing and enjoying snuff stories.

Twid:
Gotcha. That's kind of what I figured out, but it took a while to piece it all together. There were multiple threads with multiple posts that all basically said 'EWWWWW!!!!' and 'ARGGH'. I felt like I arrived late at the scene of an RTA after the police had cleaned up all the gore.

Nav:

Thanks Nav. You can never have enough Thetans! Trouble is, all the 1%ers keep them to themselves. Sharing Thetans is SOCIALISM after all 

[Misery's Fried Dough]

Unfortunately, BabylonHoruv is my fault.  He followed me here from Political Crossfire.