Author Topic: An apology from Captain Utopia  (Read 2324 times)

Faust

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An apology from Captain Utopia
« on: April 20, 2012, 07:21:06 pm »
Hey,
So it's been almost a year since the EB&G debacle and I've been
somewhat surprised to find the resentment I felt, melt away.  That has
been replaced by the realization that someone stuck out their
figurative leg, I saw it - then eagerly tripped myself up over it.
I ignored the advice I was given, and I fucked up.

Going back to the Original Snub - it is an intrinsically Discordian
behaviour to illuminate ones conceits and fancies by orchestrating
them into Chaos.  If you can't laugh when the joke is played on
you, then the joke is still on you.
  If you don't choose to throw
out the bitter tea, then you're stuck drinking it.  Recognising all
this, I could no longer hold onto my cherished resentment.

Having a cause, a forum, a vision to protect - it blinded me,
it flattered me, it seduced me.  Then it stole my
wallet and left me tied to the bed.  It exposed me, and I was
found wanting.  Now replace "it" with "I".  I don't know how I could
have successfully dealt with the threats I perceived to EB&G,
but I do know that I failed utterly and made countless stupid mistakes
and errors of judgement.  Shamefully, it's taken this long to accept
responsibility for what happened.

I still consider myself a Discordian.  But I miss reading and
discussing Discordian ideas and bullshit.  And PD remains the best
place for that.

I'd like to come back.

I don't know how that would be possible.

I pissed off and alienated everyone I considered a friend.  I tested
patience past its limit.  I declared futile war on PD knowing that I
had no allies.  And while the fight was a lot of cathartic fun, in
truth I held neither the charisma nor skill to achieve anything else
other than waste everyones time.  Too much of it was lame-drama and
attention-seeking.  For the cause!  Eggs, Omelette, etc.

Ah whatever - I am sorry for my part in the whole affair - and at
least I'd like to ask for the forgiveness of the community.  I miss
you guys.  I have no interest in settling scores, dredging up old
fights nor starting new ones.  When I wasn't feuding, I think most of
my contributions to PD were generally positive - I'd like to get back
to that if possible.


Acknowledging that I have no right to ask any favours from you - I
would deeply appreciate it if you could post my apology to Apple Talk,
regardless of the decision.  While I understand that PD is not an
e-democracy, and the decision rests with the admin team - if the
community is vehemently opposed to the idea then there's probably not
much point considering it.

Thanks,
CU
Do not choose a coward's explanation, that hides behind the cause and the effect

Doktor Howl

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2012, 07:36:50 pm »
While I am by nature a gentle and forgiving person, I really don't need to have my NUMBER ONE FAN anywhere near me, ever again.

If outvoted, I will live with the decision, but I really have to say that I'm opposed to ANOTHER round of Roger Is Evil And I Will Save You All. 
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

Alty

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2012, 07:38:32 pm »
Thanks for posting that. That seemed well thought out and sincere.

While I have no official say in the matter I would still like to take the time to say that CU can FUCK RIGHT OFF FOREVER. In my mind he is only a marker for the glory that is Utopian Discordianism, a heavy breathing warning to wayward discordians. And a complete asshole.

ETA: I am very familiar with this sort of person. I detest them. They push and they push and they push too fucking hard and then try say "OH HEY MY BAD I WILL NEVER DO IT AGAIN." and then months later they pick right back up.
« Last Edit: April 20, 2012, 07:41:40 pm by Alty »

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2012, 07:43:55 pm »
Thanks for posting that. That seemed well thought out and sincere.

While I have no official say in the matter I would still like to take the time to say that CU can FUCK RIGHT OFF FOREVER. In my mind he is only a marker for the glory that is Utopian Discordianism, a heavy breathing warning to wayward discordians. And a complete asshole.

ETA: I am very familiar with this sort of person. I detest them. They push and they push and they push too fucking hard and then try say "OH HEY MY BAD I WILL NEVER DO IT AGAIN." and then months later they pick right back up.

Last time around, it was more like 5 minutes.
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2012, 07:44:22 pm »
I am willing to forgive Fictionpuss and give him another chance.  Fictionpuss in many ways reminds me of Daruko, and while I was adamantly opposed to his initial return, it did eventually work out OK.

That said, if does go on a crazy bender again, my vote is to chuck him out the airlock.  If you want a cathartic rush, better to get it from the people we troll, whom are almost entirely more deserving of it than we are

(yes, I basically want to see Moonkitten trolling again).
"The thoughts of all men arise from the darkness. If you are the movement of your soul, and the cause of that movement precedes you, then how could you ever call your thoughts your own? How could you be anything other than a slave to the darkness that comes before? Only the Logos allows one to mitigate that slavery. Only knowing the sources of thought and action allows us to own our thoughts and our actions, to throw off the yoke of circumstance."
- R. Scott Bakker, The Darkness That Comes Before

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #5 on: April 20, 2012, 07:45:01 pm »
"I won't hit ya no more, sweetie!  I wouldn't have at all, but you made me."

"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #6 on: April 20, 2012, 07:47:53 pm »
I am willing to forgive Fictionpuss and give him another chance.  Fictionpuss in many ways reminds me of Daruko, and while I was adamantly opposed to his initial return, it did eventually work out OK.

That said, if does go on a crazy bender again, my vote is to chuck him out the airlock.  If you want a cathartic rush, better to get it from the people we troll, whom are almost entirely more deserving of it than we are

(yes, I basically want to see Moonkitten trolling again).

Like I said, I'll abide by the majority decision, etc, etc.

But I won't be really happy if he does come back.  There's a certain level of crazy that I don't need right now, and having him trying to "deal with Roger's evil" is far, far beyond that level.
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #7 on: April 20, 2012, 07:48:46 pm »
First sign of that kind of thing, airlock time as far as I'm concerned.
"The thoughts of all men arise from the darkness. If you are the movement of your soul, and the cause of that movement precedes you, then how could you ever call your thoughts your own? How could you be anything other than a slave to the darkness that comes before? Only the Logos allows one to mitigate that slavery. Only knowing the sources of thought and action allows us to own our thoughts and our actions, to throw off the yoke of circumstance."
- R. Scott Bakker, The Darkness That Comes Before

Doktor Howl

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #8 on: April 20, 2012, 07:49:10 pm »
Quote
Hey,
So it's been almost a year since the EB&G debacle and I've been
somewhat surprised to find the resentment I felt, melt away.  That has
been replaced by the realization that someone stuck out their
figurative leg
, I saw it - then eagerly tripped myself up over it.
I ignored the advice I was given, and I fucked up.

Shit, I can see it coming already.
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

Doktor Howl

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #9 on: April 20, 2012, 07:50:25 pm »
The first paragraph of the apology, read between the lines is:

"Roger set me up, and I fell for it."

 :lulz:
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #10 on: April 20, 2012, 07:51:13 pm »
++Thanks for posting that. That seemed well thought out and sincere. ++


Other than that, I don't care much.

Other than to suggest ridiculous "secret society style" initiation-mission, if he does come back it's gonna take more than words (+1 to Rog and Cain's Airlock discussion).
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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #11 on: April 20, 2012, 07:52:34 pm »
I don't know how I could
have successfully dealt with the threats I perceived to EB&G,
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

Faust

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #12 on: April 20, 2012, 07:58:33 pm »
I don't know how I could
have successfully dealt with the threats I perceived to EB&G,

Yeah that caught my eye too.
So that's one admin for, one against. ECH and 000 might take a while.

I'm only going to vote if it tips the scales either way. I'm not going to go out on a limb for him after I wasted a day of work when he diverted the boards url. But I don't especially hold any malice against him beyond that.
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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #13 on: April 20, 2012, 08:00:12 pm »
I don't know how I could
have successfully dealt with the threats I perceived to EB&G,

Yeah that caught my eye too.
So that's one admin for, one against. ECH and 000 might take a while.

I'm only going to vote if it tips the scales either way. I'm not going to go out on a limb for him after I wasted a day of work when he diverted the boards url. But I don't especially hold any malice against him beyond that.

Yeah, well, I spent the better part of a year with that fucko obsessing about me, and I'd really rather not experience that again.  Especially the last 60 days or so of the fucking insanity.
"Man, there's nothin' to do in this stupid town rope swing's busted, stinking cops always kicking me out of the park manager of the 7-11 always says "get off my curb you good for nothing" all the girls already know I'm a bad kisser so they don't come anywhere near me I don't know how many times I've been to TGIF a kid can eat an onion bloom only so many times bowling's boring, the skating rink's been taken over by 12 year olds there ain't no good movies out, blockbuster never has any good games in I don't want to play Bombad Racing, I mean what the heck is that? I'm sick of all my records and every time I walk into a record store, I forget what I want to get and their ain't nothing on TV, not a stupid thing! There ain't nothing to do 'cept take naps and wait patiently for death!"
- Brak

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Re: An apology from Captain Utopia
« Reply #14 on: April 20, 2012, 08:08:31 pm »
I don't know how I could
have successfully dealt with the threats I perceived to EB&G,

Yeah that caught my eye too.
So that's one admin for, one against. ECH and 000 might take a while.

I'm only going to vote if it tips the scales either way. I'm not going to go out on a limb for him after I wasted a day of work when he diverted the boards url. But I don't especially hold any malice against him beyond that.

Yeah, well, I spent the better part of a year with that fucko obsessing about me, and I'd really rather not experience that again.  Especially the last 60 days or so of the fucking insanity.
Yeah, well thats the thing, first sign of that and he can be ejected from the forum again.
Do not choose a coward's explanation, that hides behind the cause and the effect