Author Topic: Daily Discordia  (Read 12447 times)

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #15 on: June 24, 2012, 05:44:41 pm »
like so, today, at a family function:
Quote
dad: Did you know the Chinese own the AZ state capitol building? Our government pays RENT to the Chinese!
me: Actually it is just some private companies who own the buildings, and maybe China has a stake in it.
dad: OBAMA! GRR!
me: it was Jan Brewer and her Republican legislature who sold them, not Obama. By the way she sold them for $81 million, and this year they're buying them back.
dad: well that's good!
me: yeah. they're buying them back for $105 million. AFTER paying 2 years of lease costs on them.
dad: Those Chinese!! I can't believe it! Obama's weak!!! GRRR!
me: Ugh. Well, on the plus side I guess this means Communism really DOES work. Looks like we were on the wrong side of that Cold War thing, huh?
dad: Shut up boy.

 :lulz:
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #16 on: June 25, 2012, 04:55:52 am »
like so, today, at a family function:
Quote
dad: Did you know the Chinese own the AZ state capitol building? Our government pays RENT to the Chinese!
me: Actually it is just some private companies who own the buildings, and maybe China has a stake in it.
dad: OBAMA! GRR!
me: it was Jan Brewer and her Republican legislature who sold them, not Obama. By the way she sold them for $81 million, and this year they're buying them back.
dad: well that's good!
me: yeah. they're buying them back for $105 million. AFTER paying 2 years of lease costs on them.
dad: Those Chinese!! I can't believe it! Obama's weak!!! GRRR!
me: Ugh. Well, on the plus side I guess this means Communism really DOES work. Looks like we were on the wrong side of that Cold War thing, huh?
dad: Shut up boy.

WINNER.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Phil N.D. Blank

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #17 on: June 29, 2012, 02:13:35 am »
Mostly, Discordia gets me in a more playful spirit. I actually don't have more to say to that.

tyrannosaurus vex

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #18 on: June 29, 2012, 02:41:22 am »
Mostly, Discordia gets me in a more playful spirit. I actually don't have more to say to that.

That's what Eris said.



And then the Greeks went to war for 50 years.
« Last Edit: June 29, 2012, 04:37:25 am by v3x »
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

SecretlyHalal

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #19 on: September 14, 2012, 06:09:20 am »
For my very first post on this forum... (:retard:)

I will attempt to list all the behaviors that set me apart as a Discordian -- which should prove to be an interesting exercise for me. (Some of these are not strictly Discordian activities, but rather fall under the category "Activities of Which I Think Eris Would Approve." Also, not all are daily; some might take place seasonally, or simply whenever the n00d mood strikes me.)

~Writing derogatory messages on the contents of the fruit bowl, to remind my housemates of my affection for them
~General mischief and wreaking of havoc
~Strictly abiding by the Law of Fives, sometimes to the point of others' chagrin
~Meditation on Erisian & Discordian symbols -- which, in my opinion, convey powerful messages
~Quoting names, stories, and parables from PD and BIP whenever apropos
~Intense study of Eris and anything remotely related to Her, as I am deeply fascinated by the persona of Eris Herself, and what She stands for
~Heavily inspired by Erisian & Discordian symbolism and mythology in my art

And last, but not least…

~Erister EGGgasm

I've been participating in this holiday tradition for years, long before I even knew what Discordia was. I've always gotten a kick out of putting awkward, shocking, or confusing items in Easter eggs and including them in family or church egg hunts, then giggling as the unsuspecting participants reacted with surprise, amusement, or even outrage when they opened their eggs. Once I found out this was an actual Discordian tradition, I was elated, and figured the fortuitous coincidence implied I was meant to be Discordian all along. :) I also used this knowledge to continue my EGGgasm activities with newfound intensity.

SecretlyHalal

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #20 on: September 14, 2012, 06:12:07 am »
WARNING: Do not read the following small print if you wish to avoid TMI!

There is a funny (albeit slightly explicit) story about how the EGGgasm idea first occurred to me outside a Discordian context. Several years ago in late March, my high school boyfriend and I happened to engage in relations at my grandmother's house while she was out shopping one day. After we had, erm…"finished," he suggested we simply disguise the used condom inside another piece of trash and throw it away. But I was suddenly overcome with an irrational paranoia that my grandma would suspect what we had done and search through her garbage to find the proof. I was unspeakably horrified at the thought of my poor grandmother discovering a used condom in her house, so I insisted that we find a more creative way to dispose of the prophylactic. Since she was decorating for Easter at the time, there was a bag of as-yet-unfilled plastic eggs on her kitchen counter. We placed the condom inside an egg, then drove away with it and tossed it outside the car window a few minutes later. The egg bounced into a ditch beside a nearby trailer park; we figured it would remain safely undiscovered there.

Weeks later, while we were on our way to my family's house to celebrate Easter with them, we passed by the same location where we had previously disposed of the condom. There were a bunch of trailer park kids with baskets playing in the ditch and the nearby field, ostensibly conducting an egg hunt. We snickered to ourselves, wondering if they'd found our "offering." From that day forward, I've been a participant in Erister EGGgasm, though for several years I didn't even know it.

(Btw, if that's not a prime example of "EGGgasm", then idk what is!)


/TMI

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #21 on: September 14, 2012, 02:54:39 pm »
For my very first post on this forum... (:retard:)

I will attempt to list all the behaviors that set me apart as a Discordian -- which should prove to be an interesting exercise for me. (Some of these are not strictly Discordian activities, but rather fall under the category "Activities of Which I Think Eris Would Approve." Also, not all are daily; some might take place seasonally, or simply whenever the n00d mood strikes me.)

~Writing derogatory messages on the contents of the fruit bowl, to remind my housemates of my affection for them
~General mischief and wreaking of havoc
~Strictly abiding by the Law of Fives, sometimes to the point of others' chagrin
~Meditation on Erisian & Discordian symbols -- which, in my opinion, convey powerful messages
~Quoting names, stories, and parables from PD and BIP whenever apropos
~Intense study of Eris and anything remotely related to Her, as I am deeply fascinated by the persona of Eris Herself, and what She stands for
~Heavily inspired by Erisian & Discordian symbolism and mythology in my art

And last, but not least…

~Erister EGGgasm

I've been participating in this holiday tradition for years, long before I even knew what Discordia was. I've always gotten a kick out of putting awkward, shocking, or confusing items in Easter eggs and including them in family or church egg hunts, then giggling as the unsuspecting participants reacted with surprise, amusement, or even outrage when they opened their eggs. Once I found out this was an actual Discordian tradition, I was elated, and figured the fortuitous coincidence implied I was meant to be Discordian all along. :) I also used this knowledge to continue my EGGgasm activities with newfound intensity.

There are only TWO behaviors that make you "Discordian"..."THINKING FOR YOURSELF" and "SATURDAY NIGHT".  Without these two things, "church art" is mere vandalism, havoc is mere hooliganism, and being an asshat is just another form of being anti-social.

All the other shit you mentioned is a great example of sitting down in a restaurant and eating the menu.  For example, the "law of fives" is a method of demonstrating confirmation bias.  It's a PARODY.  Likewise, meditating on symbology is sort of like praying to a stop sign, and Eris doesn't give a shit if you give a shit about her, she's gonna fuck you up anyway.   It's what the old bag DOES.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #22 on: September 14, 2012, 02:55:22 pm »
WARNING: Do not read the following small print if you wish to avoid TMI!

There is a funny (albeit slightly explicit) story about how the EGGgasm idea first occurred to me outside a Discordian context. Several years ago in late March, my high school boyfriend and I happened to engage in relations at my grandmother's house while she was out shopping one day. After we had, erm…"finished," he suggested we simply disguise the used condom inside another piece of trash and throw it away. But I was suddenly overcome with an irrational paranoia that my grandma would suspect what we had done and search through her garbage to find the proof. I was unspeakably horrified at the thought of my poor grandmother discovering a used condom in her house, so I insisted that we find a more creative way to dispose of the prophylactic. Since she was decorating for Easter at the time, there was a bag of as-yet-unfilled plastic eggs on her kitchen counter. We placed the condom inside an egg, then drove away with it and tossed it outside the car window a few minutes later. The egg bounced into a ditch beside a nearby trailer park; we figured it would remain safely undiscovered there.

Weeks later, while we were on our way to my family's house to celebrate Easter with them, we passed by the same location where we had previously disposed of the condom. There were a bunch of trailer park kids with baskets playing in the ditch and the nearby field, ostensibly conducting an egg hunt. We snickered to ourselves, wondering if they'd found our "offering." From that day forward, I've been a participant in Erister EGGgasm, though for several years I didn't even know it.

(Btw, if that's not a prime example of "EGGgasm", then idk what is!)


/TMI

That's actually kinda squicky.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #23 on: September 15, 2012, 09:50:51 pm »
WARNING: Do not read the following small print if you wish to avoid TMI!

There is a funny (albeit slightly explicit) story about how the EGGgasm idea first occurred to me outside a Discordian context. Several years ago in late March, my high school boyfriend and I happened to engage in relations at my grandmother's house while she was out shopping one day. After we had, erm…"finished," he suggested we simply disguise the used condom inside another piece of trash and throw it away. But I was suddenly overcome with an irrational paranoia that my grandma would suspect what we had done and search through her garbage to find the proof. I was unspeakably horrified at the thought of my poor grandmother discovering a used condom in her house, so I insisted that we find a more creative way to dispose of the prophylactic. Since she was decorating for Easter at the time, there was a bag of as-yet-unfilled plastic eggs on her kitchen counter. We placed the condom inside an egg, then drove away with it and tossed it outside the car window a few minutes later. The egg bounced into a ditch beside a nearby trailer park; we figured it would remain safely undiscovered there.

Weeks later, while we were on our way to my family's house to celebrate Easter with them, we passed by the same location where we had previously disposed of the condom. There were a bunch of trailer park kids with baskets playing in the ditch and the nearby field, ostensibly conducting an egg hunt. We snickered to ourselves, wondering if they'd found our "offering." From that day forward, I've been a participant in Erister EGGgasm, though for several years I didn't even know it.

(Btw, if that's not a prime example of "EGGgasm", then idk what is!)


/TMI

Somehow, this whole story comes across to me as a contrived excuse to tell the Internet that you had sex.  :lol:
« Last Edit: September 15, 2012, 09:52:46 pm by A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic »
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #24 on: September 15, 2012, 09:52:18 pm »
WARNING: Do not read the following small print if you wish to avoid TMI!

There is a funny (albeit slightly explicit) story about how the EGGgasm idea first occurred to me outside a Discordian context. Several years ago in late March, my high school boyfriend and I happened to engage in relations at my grandmother's house while she was out shopping one day. After we had, erm…"finished," he suggested we simply disguise the used condom inside another piece of trash and throw it away. But I was suddenly overcome with an irrational paranoia that my grandma would suspect what we had done and search through her garbage to find the proof. I was unspeakably horrified at the thought of my poor grandmother discovering a used condom in her house, so I insisted that we find a more creative way to dispose of the prophylactic. Since she was decorating for Easter at the time, there was a bag of as-yet-unfilled plastic eggs on her kitchen counter. We placed the condom inside an egg, then drove away with it and tossed it outside the car window a few minutes later. The egg bounced into a ditch beside a nearby trailer park; we figured it would remain safely undiscovered there.

Weeks later, while we were on our way to my family's house to celebrate Easter with them, we passed by the same location where we had previously disposed of the condom. There were a bunch of trailer park kids with baskets playing in the ditch and the nearby field, ostensibly conducting an egg hunt. We snickered to ourselves, wondering if they'd found our "offering." From that day forward, I've been a participant in Erister EGGgasm, though for several years I didn't even know it.

(Btw, if that's not a prime example of "EGGgasm", then idk what is!)


/TMI

That's actually kinda squicky.

Also, this.

I'd feel differently about it if you had ended it with "We were horrified and ashamed,", but no.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


tjg92

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #25 on: September 15, 2012, 11:34:21 pm »
Well I think it's a marvelous story.

N E T

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #26 on: September 16, 2012, 01:07:05 am »
Snickering about children finding your used condoms in easter eggs is something I'd be ashamed of, not something I'd consider a "funny" or "marvelous" story.
“There are some defeats more triumphant than victories.” - M I C H E L   D E   M O N T A I G N E

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #27 on: September 16, 2012, 03:06:37 am »
Snickering about children finding your used condoms in easter eggs is something I'd be ashamed of, not something I'd consider a "funny" or "marvelous" story.

Seriously. If the idea of a little kid handling a semen-filled prophylactic is funny to someone, there's something horribly awry with them.

If it's funny because they're getting some kind of kick out of "shocking" children, either they have some kind of severe emotional/developmental delay that leads them to seek validation from children, or they're still a child themselves.

Or, alternate possibility, they're the kind of person who turns into playground masturbators.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #28 on: September 16, 2012, 03:09:19 am »
Or maybe it's ok because they were just, you know, trailer park kids.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #29 on: September 16, 2012, 03:17:26 am »
Or maybe it's ok because they were just, you know, trailer park kids.

Yeah, poor people don't really count as people.  It's okay to do horribly inappropriate things to their children, because they're just animals and shit.

Frankly, I find the fucktard that posted this to be a sociopath at best, and tjg92 to be a fucking idiot.

Fuck 'em both.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.