Author Topic: Daily Discordia  (Read 12425 times)

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

  • v=1/3πr2h
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 687093
  • The sky tastes like red exuberance.
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #30 on: September 16, 2012, 04:11:55 am »
Or maybe it's ok because they were just, you know, trailer park kids.

Yeah, poor people don't really count as people.  It's okay to do horribly inappropriate things to their children, because they're just animals and shit.

Frankly, I find the fucktard that posted this to be a sociopath at best, and tjg92 to be a fucking idiot.

Fuck 'em both.

Unless they engage a little more and present evidence otherwise, I'm going to have to agree with your assessment.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Dildo Argentino

  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 24867
  • Whatever ain't what it used to be.
    • View Profile
    • futureupdate
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #31 on: September 16, 2012, 09:23:21 am »
As a longer-term exercise in Discordianism, I recently moved from Hungary to the UK with my family: wife, six kids, one dog. I proceeded to get terribly depressed and after six months I decided I didn't like it there... so we packed up again, and moved back to Hungary. Our landlord here had just gotten around to having the house painted and failed to get new tenants in, so we ended up re-renting the house we had before (praise be to Eris, we really like it here). Life is now dandy, exciting... and I learnt a very expensive lesson about attachment to a place. Oh, and all my kids learnt more English than they would have done here in six years...

Daily activities: On days I feel worthy of it, I wear the Discordian pendant I made for my wife, which she refused to wear after a trial period because "the chaos was just coming on too strong". When the opportunity presents itself (and believe me, it does, very regularly), I give thanks for the sheer unpredictability of the life I have managed to arrange for myself and remind myself that this would not have been possible without our benevolent though occasionally sadistic prankster universe playing along.
« Last Edit: September 16, 2012, 10:08:02 am by holist »
Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis

Tiddleywomp Cockletit

  • La Mano Famosa del Infierno
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 151984
  • Interweb Horrormonkey of Love
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #32 on: September 16, 2012, 09:43:42 am »
WARNING: Do not read the following small print if you wish to avoid TMI!

There is a funny (albeit slightly explicit) story about how the EGGgasm idea first occurred to me outside a Discordian context. Several years ago in late March, my high school boyfriend and I happened to engage in relations at my grandmother's house while she was out shopping one day. After we had, erm…"finished," he suggested we simply disguise the used condom inside another piece of trash and throw it away. But I was suddenly overcome with an irrational paranoia that my grandma would suspect what we had done and search through her garbage to find the proof. I was unspeakably horrified at the thought of my poor grandmother discovering a used condom in her house, so I insisted that we find a more creative way to dispose of the prophylactic. Since she was decorating for Easter at the time, there was a bag of as-yet-unfilled plastic eggs on her kitchen counter. We placed the condom inside an egg, then drove away with it and tossed it outside the car window a few minutes later. The egg bounced into a ditch beside a nearby trailer park; we figured it would remain safely undiscovered there.

Weeks later, while we were on our way to my family's house to celebrate Easter with them, we passed by the same location where we had previously disposed of the condom. There were a bunch of trailer park kids with baskets playing in the ditch and the nearby field, ostensibly conducting an egg hunt. We snickered to ourselves, wondering if they'd found our "offering." From that day forward, I've been a participant in Erister EGGgasm, though for several years I didn't even know it.

(Btw, if that's not a prime example of "EGGgasm", then idk what is!)


/TMI

1) Your grandmother knows people fuck. Better for her to find a condom in the trash where she was looking for it. Better for her to jump YOUR shit about fucking in her house than to shock some kid.

2) If my kids were little and they found an egg with a fucking used condom in it, I'd assume since it was in a plastic easter egg, some pervert put it there for them to find and I'd make a police report. Cops LOVE catching pedos, it's a pretty substantial felony catch and I'm sure they'd check for prints as well as running the DNA.
« Last Edit: September 16, 2012, 09:48:17 am by TEXAS FAIRIES FOR ALL YOU SPAGS »
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Tiddleywomp Cockletit

  • La Mano Famosa del Infierno
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 151984
  • Interweb Horrormonkey of Love
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #33 on: September 16, 2012, 09:45:04 am »
Or maybe it's ok because they were just, you know, trailer park kids.

Yeah, poor people don't really count as people.  It's okay to do horribly inappropriate things to their children, because they're just animals and shit.

Frankly, I find the fucktard that posted this to be a sociopath at best, and tjg92 to be a fucking idiot.

Fuck 'em both.

Also this.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

  • v=1/3πr2h
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 687093
  • The sky tastes like red exuberance.
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #34 on: September 16, 2012, 03:25:48 pm »
Welcome back, Holist. I'm sorry your move to the UK didn't work out, but glad you are happily settled now. Also I hope we don't have to have that conversation about homeopathy ever again.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


SecretlyHalal

  • Known
  • *
  • Posts: 123
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #35 on: September 16, 2012, 04:57:13 pm »
There are only TWO behaviors that make you "Discordian"..."THINKING FOR YOURSELF" and "SATURDAY NIGHT"

Thank you for explaining what Discordianism is, so I can "think for myself" by following your definition.

..."church art" is mere vandalism...

I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't do "church art," nor to I vandalize.

For example, the "law of fives" is a method of demonstrating confirmation bias.  It's a PARODY.

I'm well aware of the fact that the Law of Fives is a parody. I choose to follow it for the very purpose of demonstrating confirmation bias, and because sometimes it's fun(ny) to see how many steps it takes to intentionally relate any number/subject to five. It's ok to have fun with a parody, isn't it?

...meditating on symbology is sort of like praying to a stop sign...

I do not "pray" to symbols -- or stop signs. I'm agnostic and hold no belief in the supernatural whatsoever; therefore, I don't believe symbols contain any magical powers. I do, however, believe in the beneficial results of meditation (which are well-documented), and focusing on symbols helps me concentrate well enough to reach the meditative state I desire.

SecretlyHalal

  • Known
  • *
  • Posts: 123
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #36 on: September 16, 2012, 05:00:40 pm »
playground masturbator
fucktard
sociopath


Going a little overboard here. For people who hold the Curse of Greyface to be a valuable life lesson, you guys sure seem to take a lot of things WAY too seriously. I've read thread after thread of forum members bashing newcomers for even the slightest things, like a question they felt was dumb, or a screen name they didn't particularly care for. And here I am being accused of viewing poor people as subhuman, doing "horribly inappropriate things" to kids, masturbating at playgrounds, and considering children to be mere animals. Think what you want of my story, but all these accusations are completely absurd.

The idea of those kids finding our egg made me laugh for the same reason It's Always Sunny episodes, or The Office skits, or comedians telling improper jokes make me laugh -- sometimes awkward, inappropriate situations are funny. Even when they're not, sometimes the only worthwhile response to such situations is laughter.

If, through some fault of mine, any harm were to ever befall a child, I would absolutely feel shame and horror -- not to mention the deepest remorse. Suffering is a big deal to me, especially the suffering of innocents. But I assure you no children were harmed by the contents of the egg we threw away; no suffering of any kind was caused by someone happening upon our discarded trash, IF anyone did after all. It is outrageous to insinuate that I'm some kind of classist, sociopathic child molester simply because I chuckled at the possibility of an event which -- had it actually occurred -- would've hurt absolutely NO ONE and had NO lasting effect whatsoever. How in the hell does this make me the type of person who would mistreat children or be entertained by the sight of them in pain? You people act like I showed up at a playground and raped a child, or placed a loaded gun in the middle of a crowded daycare. The words "overreaction" and "exaggeration" don't even begin to cover it.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

  • v=1/3πr2h
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 687093
  • The sky tastes like red exuberance.
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #37 on: September 16, 2012, 05:09:25 pm »
 :lulz: ...annnnnd straight to "grayface" and "doing it wrong" because we don't all think your "leaving a used condom in an easter egg for children to find on Easter" anecdote was funny.

Of course we're going to speculate on exactly what kind of person would find something like that funny, and the directions that speculation takes isn't pretty. It's about as pretty as laughing because some little kid going to get a semen-filled condom amidst her Easter candies.

Protip: bipeds can admit when they're wrong. 
« Last Edit: September 16, 2012, 05:12:27 pm by A Very Hairy Monkey In An Ill-Fitting Tunic »
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

  • v=1/3πr2h
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 687093
  • The sky tastes like red exuberance.
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #38 on: September 16, 2012, 05:15:39 pm »
I mean, SOME measure of remorse or horror would make it all make sense, from a human perspective. "OH FUCK I can't believe that just happened! What did we do?!" followed by "we couldn't help laughing" would reflect horrormirth. But the way you presented it was sheer "Oh aren't I just the cutest and cleverest" puerile glee. You can take it back, you can clarify, but you sure as hell can't make me feel like a heel for thinking that story made you sound like a heel.
“I’m guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk,” Charles Wick said. “It was very complicated.”


Cain

  • Alea iacta est
  • Chekha
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 105000
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #39 on: September 16, 2012, 05:15:53 pm »
Surely to count as EggGASM it would require a condom full of ova, not sperm.

You didn't even manage to make that potential connection, did you?

Dildo Argentino

  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 24867
  • Whatever ain't what it used to be.
    • View Profile
    • futureupdate
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #40 on: September 16, 2012, 06:18:20 pm »
Welcome back, Holist. I'm sorry your move to the UK didn't work out, but glad you are happily settled now. Also I hope we don't have to have that conversation about homeopathy ever again.

Hey, Nigel.

Hope dies last, as they say.

I would probably have taken your welcome at face value - but I spent an hour earlier today re-reading the "music - what it is" thread. Which has been moved to the peanut gallery, but I plan to start it over. I only got about halfway through, but I am already acutely aware that I don't like you and I don't trust you - not even as much as a complete stranger on the interwebs.

Let's see how it goes this time.

holist

Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis

Cain

  • Alea iacta est
  • Chekha
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 105000
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #41 on: September 16, 2012, 06:21:15 pm »
Well, I expect telling some straight up that you don't like or trust them is going to help you two to get along tremendously.

I frequently open business meetings with our corporate partners with such words.  Except to our special partners in catering, whom I greet with a hearty "fuck you" and make a wanking motion with my hand.  I find it helps set the mood for the coming proceedings.

The Good Reverend Roger

  • Horrible Bastard
  • One-Armed Jizz Moppers
  • Deserved It
  • **
  • Posts: 36736
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #42 on: September 16, 2012, 06:21:44 pm »
playground masturbator
fucktard
sociopath


Going a little overboard here. For people who hold the Curse of Greyface to be a valuable life lesson, you guys sure seem to take a lot of things WAY too seriously. I've read thread after thread of forum members bashing newcomers for even the slightest things, like a question they felt was dumb, or a screen name they didn't particularly care for. And here I am being accused of viewing poor people as subhuman, doing "horribly inappropriate things" to kids, masturbating at playgrounds, and considering children to be mere animals. Think what you want of my story, but all these accusations are completely absurd.

The idea of those kids finding our egg made me laugh for the same reason It's Always Sunny episodes, or The Office skits, or comedians telling improper jokes make me laugh -- sometimes awkward, inappropriate situations are funny. Even when they're not, sometimes the only worthwhile response to such situations is laughter.

If, through some fault of mine, any harm were to ever befall a child, I would absolutely feel shame and horror -- not to mention the deepest remorse. Suffering is a big deal to me, especially the suffering of innocents. But I assure you no children were harmed by the contents of the egg we threw away; no suffering of any kind was caused by someone happening upon our discarded trash, IF anyone did after all. It is outrageous to insinuate that I'm some kind of classist, sociopathic child molester simply because I chuckled at the possibility of an event which -- had it actually occurred -- would've hurt absolutely NO ONE and had NO lasting effect whatsoever. How in the hell does this make me the type of person who would mistreat children or be entertained by the sight of them in pain? You people act like I showed up at a playground and raped a child, or placed a loaded gun in the middle of a crowded daycare. The words "overreaction" and "exaggeration" don't even begin to cover it.

You're fucked in the head. 

That is all.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

  • Horrible Bastard
  • One-Armed Jizz Moppers
  • Deserved It
  • **
  • Posts: 36736
    • View Profile
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #43 on: September 16, 2012, 06:22:50 pm »
Welcome back, Holist. I'm sorry your move to the UK didn't work out, but glad you are happily settled now. Also I hope we don't have to have that conversation about homeopathy ever again.

Hey, Nigel.

Hope dies last, as they say.

I would probably have taken your welcome at face value - but I spent an hour earlier today re-reading the "music - what it is" thread. Which has been moved to the peanut gallery, but I plan to start it over. I only got about halfway through, but I am already acutely aware that I don't like you and I don't trust you - not even as much as a complete stranger on the interwebs.

Let's see how it goes this time.

holist

Well, fuck you too.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Dildo Argentino

  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 24867
  • Whatever ain't what it used to be.
    • View Profile
    • futureupdate
Re: Daily Discordia
« Reply #44 on: September 16, 2012, 06:32:48 pm »
Well, fuck you too.

I can't place you, because many of you changed your names and you don't have a distinctive sig.

If you tell me who you were last time I was around here, I can decide if I want to respond in kind or just smile hello.

If you don't - well, I won't.

Not too keen on rigor, myself - reminds me of mortis