By the power of lulz, I, while living, have conquered the internets.
Well, "Grand Ol' Discordja," it looks to me like we're all getting to be a bunch of pseudo-intellectual bullshit artists (some more bullshit than artist). Map this and meme that and what's the O:M flavor of the week, and it's all fun and games until somebody just wants fun and games. It's time to wonder again, kids. It's time to stop giving the answer in the form of a question. We're not on Jeopardy, We're in jeopardy. And it's time to ask ourselves not WHY we bother, but DO WE bother at all?We're lacking something these days. We still flame each other like the Old Days (not that I was ever around to see them), so we know we have the will to fight. But I don't think we have anything to fight for. We're stagnating, like the coffee you let sit out all last week, and come Monday you don't have the energy to make a fresh pot.Lately everybody's on about the Big Picture. What's the Biggest Big Picture? What color is its pubic hair? I don't know, and I find myself caring less and less every second. What the fuck do I really care about starving kids in Africa, or the oppression and slaughter of entire peoples (also in Africa, usually, but I'm not making generalizations). If I cared I'd send them my 73 cents a day and be done with it. Fuck the Big Picture and International Liberation and the March of Dimes. I need the SMALL Picture to come into focus first.What I want isn't the "a job well done is its own reward" bullshit they've been getting us to believe for a thousand years. And no, I'm not going to define who the fuck THEY are, because I if you don't deal with THEM, if you don't already have your own fucked-up inconsistent view of who THEY are, then fuck you, you don't get it, and I don't have time to wake you up.What I want isn't two cars and a picket fucking fence. I don't want a dog wearing a sweater. I don't want a big-screen TV. I don't want a mortgage with a guaranteed lower-than-market-average interest rate. That might be the American Dream, but I don't have anything else in common with Americans so why would you expect me to share their incoherent, drunken, hazy idea of the Future?What I want is to live where it's easy to gain security, but hard to gain weight. I want to ride in a fucking banana-powered hovercraft and work in a greenhouse on the Moon. I want a space-suit, a rocket-propelled lawnmower, and a radio-controlled refrigerator. Rosie the fucking Robot. Not radioactive microwave dinners that are too cold to eat but too hot to touch. Not greater fuel-efficiency that still manages to cost me half of my retirement fund every week. I want a government that thinks before it acts, or even better, a government that just thinks and never acts. I want free parking. Free camping. I want unisex leotards made out of that shiny shit we were all supposed to be wearing by now, if you listened to anyone in the 50's.I want the future we were promised, not yet another boring season of this fucked up cosmic sit-com we call Real Life(tm), and definitely not all the crap that goes into making us believe that it's OKAY to call a day with 5 warrantless arrests better than a day with 5 suicide bombings.I want to drive down the road and not have to hold back my psychic powers for fear of blasting everyone in my way off the planet. Psychic powers should be embraced, never postponed. And I don't mean YOU, Sylvia Browne. You're a picture of all that is wrong and fat with the world.And, I want to fight in a Revolution. I good, old-fashioned, "Fuck the entire god-damned system, I'd rather live in a fucking cave, you assholes" revofuckinglution. And I don't care if we win. I don't even care if we get anybody's attention. Even a doomed insurrection is better than pretending to be somewhat intrigued by the idea of contemplating the Human Condition whilst spending every waking second contributing to the demise of the Human Race.
since I am unable to write anything new maybe I will start foraging for old shit, compile it into bible format with chapter and verse, print it from some online book publisher and leave it laying around where people can find it.