This is a classic "shit or get off the pot" moment. By that I don't mean you need to do anything, really. Only that you need to weigh your options:
- Discordia: some yahoos who believe doing what is right equals doing what they want, with high doses of horror and mirth.
- Other: other yahoos who believe doing what is right equals doing what you're told, with high doses of horror disguised as mirth.
- Nothing: just you, squeaking out an existence between all other forces. dodging bullets 007-style. evading capture. on second thought this is also Discordia, so nevermind.
Just weigh those options for a moment. I don't know what place Discordia occupies in your mind, nor should I. All I know is it's there, and if you don't need it or want it, you should get rid of it. Fuck, that's what it's all about. By doing so you'd only be proving yourself a Discordian, in that you have the guts to throw away a framework of ideas that just don't do it for you anymore.
The problem is you've been infected. You can go whichever way you want, but Discordia is in your genome now, and it's actively rearranging your DNA. It isn't just some philosophy you can pick up and put down again. What you know, you can't un-know. What you've seen can't be unseen. The fact that you are able to question whether you belong is evidence that you do.