Hi, I'm Shaky, and I'm the squad leader for 2d squad, 3rd plt of C company. I hold down brown people while you steal from them. It's not a bad gig, as long as there's enough smokes and maybe a 6 pack when we go back for R&R. It's thirsty work.
Hi, I'm Little Billy, and I'm an aircraft mechanic for a small airline that does government contracts between America and her Southern neighbor(s). It gets kind of hairy sometimes, but I like it. It keeps my blood pumping. I have a wife and two children, and I live in Batavia.
Hi, I'm Padre Dolor, and I run with Judge Richardson's crew. I keep the protection money moving, and run the occasional card game. I had a wife and two children. Now I have a different wife and I'm thousands and thousands of miles away. My wife is a very violent person on the outside, but inside she's all snakes and bad wiring, so it's okay.
Hi, I'm The Good Reverend Roger, and I police your streets. I hit people on the collar bone a lot, and I pick up dead meth heads every few weeks, from under the bridge. I have the same wife, and I'm even further away than I was before. But I live on a mountain, and every morning I piss down on the town and tell them I love them.
Hi, I'm Doktor Howl, and I make SCIENCE happen by repairing the plant. This allows feedstock to go to Chinese factories where 12 year olds work 30 hour shifts making smart phones for you. The hours are long, but the pay is good. I have a different wife now, and two kids. They're the same kids, just different. I live in Tucson, Arizona, and I'm very, very happy.
Hi, I'm the Good Reverend Doktor Billy, and I don't know what I do. I think I'm an ex-soldier, ex-smuggler, ex-mook, ex-cop, maintenance kind of guy, but things are getting a little sideways, if you know what I mean. I have a wife and two kids, one of which is away marching in my footsteps. I live in Oro Valley, Arizona, and I own two cars. I had a dog once, but it ran off with a girl named Cheryl. I don't remember much about her. But I'm very, very happy.
Hi, I'm some collection of jumbled up memories that all seem to be my own. I work in some sort of refinery, and I march around in circles. The Grabby Girls can't catch you if you keep moving. I sometimes have to fire people, which makes me sad. Sometimes the people I fire buy guns and disappear. This worries me in a vague sort of way, but other than that, I'm happy. I have a wife and one and a half kids, and I live in purgatory. It's not so bad, once you get used to it. My state government is insane, but that's what happens in a democracy when the citizenry is insane. I take drugs to sleep at night. I'm happy.
I know who I am/was/might have been. Who the fuck are you?