Author Topic: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World  (Read 3938 times)

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #30 on: March 20, 2015, 02:49:31 pm »
More shortly.

The Wizard Joseph

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #31 on: March 20, 2015, 05:52:20 pm »
  :mittens:
Intermission. Go get yourself a snack!:popcorn:
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
 - Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

LMNO

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #32 on: March 20, 2015, 08:24:09 pm »
Damn.

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #33 on: March 26, 2015, 03:02:35 pm »
Out in the desert

"You know," Hank said, looking at the dead nag, "I'm beginning to have a bad feeling about this."

"Yeah?  It's not so hard," the Kid responded, "He doubled back to town.  He'd have to...Ain't no place to go out here without a horse."

"Yeah, well, last time a horse died under him, he killed that other preacher."

"Don't care much about that part.  Preacher's business is preacher's business.  Ain't no worry for us."

"Then why are we chasing this guy?"

"Because the Undertaker told us to.  Persuaded us for $500."

When they got back to town, nobody was surprised to see that the bartender was dead.  Nor were they surprised to see the bartender's proper horse missing, the tracks leading toward the border, on a slightly different heading that they had returned to.  Virgil grinned.

"We're heading East, boys."

"His tracks DO head South," Abner replied, "But I ain't here to argue.  This one's slipperier than an eel, and no mistake.  East where?  Any place in particular?"

"Faro."

All of them stopped, looked at Virgil, and grinned.

Miles away, just outside of Faro

"Babylon," the Preacher muttered, "Perfect."  And it was, really, if you were going to have a fight to the death against 4:1 odds.  Faro was named after a notoriously crooked card game, and the town was itself notorious for gambling, whoring, drinking, opium, and every other abuse you could imagine.  And then a few you couldn't imagine, but you had to know a guy who knows a guy.  It was said that, for the truly connected, anything could be purchased in Faro.  Everything, that is, except proper law enforcement, which was left to the bouncers of the various establishments.

He rode into town, and headed for the stables.  Once there, he sold the horse.  Had he felt the need to worry about tomorrow, he would have been angered by the selling price.  He had most definitely been blatantly ripped off...Attested to by the toothless grin of the fat stablemaster, "Smiles", during the exchange.  Still, he had enough money for his plan, and enough to live pretty high on the hog for a couple of weeks...Which was 10 days longer than he felt he needed.   On the off chance his plan worked and he lived, then he might see the stablemaster again.  And maybe teach him how to smile in a totally different way.

He walked over to the saloon, and glanced inside.  The bartender was a fat, mustachioed Mexican.  Sitting at one end of the bar was a collection of tired-looking working girls.  Perfect.

He walked in, and slapped a coin down on the bar.  "Whiskey, and."

The bartender brought up a bottle, poured a shot, and made the coin disappear.  "And...?"

"I'd like to put your whores on retainer."

"You're a preacher, right?  I'm not making a thing about it, but you are."

"I am."

"Pretty horny for a preacher, you want all them girls."

"Here's $100.  When I give you the say-so, I want all but 3 of them up in my room, in no more than 5 minutes.  There won't be any rough stuff or anything like that.  I just like lots of girls.  Loads of girls.  If they're there within 5 minutes, and stay, oh, let's say 3 hours, you get another hundred."

$200 for 7 girls, 3 hours.  Ought to be about $42, maybe $50 for the short notice.  What's your game?"

"My game is to give you money.  Do you want it or not?"

"You rough them girls up, it's gonna cost you extra."

"Like I said, no rough stuff.  This is in fact the easiest trick they'll ever turn...But..."

"I knew there was a catch."

"Well, I am a preacher.  I'd like you and the girls to forget about this."

"Aha.  Gotcha.  Deal, mister", the bartender said, thinking that he'd found the reason for the weird request and ridiculously high offer.

He was, of course, wrong.

to be continued.



 

LMNO

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #34 on: March 26, 2015, 05:03:56 pm »
The tension builds...

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #35 on: March 26, 2015, 05:10:54 pm »

Eater of Clowns

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #36 on: March 26, 2015, 05:33:04 pm »
Bracing for impact.
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

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Doktor Howl

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #37 on: March 26, 2015, 05:44:25 pm »
Bracing for impact.

I might get a bit more done today, and I hope to finish the story tomorrow.

The Wizard Joseph

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #38 on: March 26, 2015, 07:50:52 pm »
This protagonist of yours has me rooting for him, but I'm not sure the part of me doing so is actually good.
It's all muddy waters and doubly damned choices.
Got me thinking, and I was already in the bad sort of thoughtful mood today.
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
 - Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #39 on: March 26, 2015, 08:54:09 pm »
This protagonist of yours has me rooting for him, but I'm not sure the part of me doing so is actually good.
It's all muddy waters and doubly damned choices.
Got me thinking, and I was already in the bad sort of thoughtful mood today.

You're rooting for him because he's the main character, most likely.

That doesn't necessarily mean he's a good guy, except by comparison.  Take him out of the context of this story, and what is he?

The Wizard Joseph

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #40 on: March 26, 2015, 09:20:01 pm »
This protagonist of yours has me rooting for him, but I'm not sure the part of me doing so is actually good.
It's all muddy waters and doubly damned choices.
Got me thinking, and I was already in the bad sort of thoughtful mood today.

You're rooting for him because he's the main character, most likely.

That doesn't necessarily mean he's a good guy, except by comparison.  Take him out of the context of this story, and what is he?

An angry, murdering sonofabitch without a rudder on his boat.

I see now that I pity him more than I sympathize. I DO sympathize though.
When I was much younger I was similar, though never in deed a killer.
I am very glad for the many factors that have brought me out from that time.

Just once more, this is great storytelling.
You can't get out backward.  You have to go forward to go back.. better press on! - Willie Wonka, PBUH

Life can be seen as a game with no reset button, no extra lives, and if the power goes out there is no restarting.  If that's all you see life as you are not long for this world, and never will get it.

"Ayn Rand never swung a hammer in her life and had serious dominance issues" - The Fountainhead

"World domination is such an ugly phrase. I prefer to call it world optimisation."
 - Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality :lulz:

LMNO

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #41 on: March 26, 2015, 10:17:57 pm »
Yeah.

Doktor Howl

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #42 on: March 27, 2015, 04:32:21 pm »
Faro

The four horsemen dismounted and tied their horses to the rail in front of the saloon.  Brushing the dust off of themselves with their hats, they looked around at the empty streets.

"Funny," the Kid said.

"How's that?" Virgil asked, giving him a narrow look.

"How come we never see people when we come to town?"

"You're gonna see people, kid.  This saloon has the finest whores in the territory."

"Well, that's good.  I like that part a lot.  But how come we never see, you know, regular folks?  Shopkeepers, blacksmiths, that sort?"

"The territory ain't what it used to be.  Most of 'em moved on.  California. maybe."

"Then how do the people still here get by?"

"Stop worrying yourself over shit that don't matter, Kid.  We go in, we have a drink, we get our ashes hauled, then we get back on the job.  It wouldn't do to let the Undertaker down.  You just worry about that instead."

They walked into the saloon.  3 whores rested against the piano, and the bartender stood behind the bar, cleaning a glass.  He looked up a them.  "Howdy, gentlemen, what can I do for you today?"

"Several things," Hank said, "First, you see a preacher come through here in the last day or two?"

The bartender thought about it.  He didn't know the man upstairs, didn't know if he was a preacher or not.  He also thought "lawmen", and considered the other hundred he wouldn't get if the man was the preacher and was hauled off.

"Ain't seen any preacher, mister.  We don't get many of them in this particular bar."

"Okay," Hank continued, "You can also get us a bottle of whiskey and maybe the services of your young lady-friends."

"They're a friendly bunch.  Two dollars a throw.  Only there's only 3 at the moment.  The rest are off on a private party."

"Three will be fine," Abner said, nervously eyeing his ghost, "I will merely have a drink and perhaps play that piano of yours, if it's tuned."

"It's tuned.  Be glad to hear someone play it."

The other three men got acquainted with their new friends, and moved upstairs.  Abner sat down behind the piano and started playing old stuff, from before the bust.  The bartender stopped what he was doing, and just enjoyed the music.

Upstairs

The Preacher peeked out through the door again.  Three of his pursuers had gone into other rooms, leaving the florid Englishman downstairs.  He decided to give it another minute, let them get settled.  He glanced around the room he was in.  It was, of course, stuffed full with seven prostitutes and their ghosts.  The preacher winced.  One prositute's ghost appeared to be her mother.  The rest were infants, bearing marks of strangulation or drowning, and all floated silently, glaring at their murderous mothers.

When enough time had passed, he looked at the prostitutes and placed a finger to his lips.  He then drew his pistol and walked out the door onto the balcony above the tap room.  He looked down at the piano, and there the Englishman was, playing some pre-bust nostalgia piece.  The Preacher raised his pistol and shot the Englishman in the chest.  The man flopped backwards onto the ground, his ghostly maiden fading out of sight, visibly trying to scream.  The Preacher ran down the stairs, past the horrified bartender, and out to the stables.

On the floor, Abner tried to laugh, but didn't seem to have the strength.  At least I dodged the Undertaker's rope, was his last thought.

The Preacher ran across the stableyard.  He could already hear the shouts of concern from the other three men in the prostitutes' cribs.  He ran through the stable door, and saw that the inkeeper's horse was there, still saddled and ready to ride, as he had prepared it two hours eariler.  He jumped on, and galloped out of the stable and around the front of the saloon.  There he paused, and fired four more shots.  The four horsemen's horses all dropped dead at the rail.

The Preacher felt bad.  He always felt bad when he had to kill animals.

He spurred his new horse, and galloped out of town, his own ghost gleefully chuckling all the way.

To be continued.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2015, 04:39:14 pm by Doktor Howl »

LMNO

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #43 on: March 27, 2015, 04:49:43 pm »
Oh, it's on.

Eater of Clowns

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Re: The Weird West, or A Tale of Morality in an Immoral World
« Reply #44 on: March 27, 2015, 06:23:58 pm »
The wiley bastard pulled it off, I see.   :lulz:
EoC, you are the bane of my existence.

EoC doesn't make creepy.

EoC makes creepy worse.

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the afflicted persons get hold of and consume carrots even in socially quite unacceptable situations.