Author Topic: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.  (Read 1518 times)

Q. G. Pennyworth

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I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« on: April 28, 2016, 12:30:21 pm »
Should I buy these eggs?

Because we don't cook a lot of them
And I don't want them to go to waste
But if we don't have any I skip some foods
That I'd otherwise like to make
And they're not all that expensive
But I'd hate to take them home
Just to rot
And I don't know if I should buy these eggs.

Because there was a car following us
From the office to the store
A black sedan with square-jawed passengers
And when we were in the produce section
One of them got out
Walked over to our car
And stood by it before leaving
And maybe they were just placing a GPS
Or taking one off
But maybe it was something worse
And when we get in the car it will explode
And scatter our corpses and groceries everywhere
And the eggs will splatter dramatically on the pavement
An unintended casualty of our assassination
And these eggs really didn't do anything to deserve that
They deserve to be cooked and eaten
Not b-roll for the 6 o'clock report
But I might want to make omelettes
And are the white ones cheaper?
(Nope, brown is less this week)
And I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
Overheating Pheremone Pustule of Last Saturday's Jiggle Fun| _xgeWireToEvent: Unknown extension 131, this should never happen.

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P3nT4gR4m

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #1 on: April 29, 2016, 11:34:09 am »
Hairs on the back of my neck! Somehow reminded me of When the Wind Blows
Not actually a meat product.
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Junkenstein

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #2 on: April 29, 2016, 03:59:59 pm »
The couple stand in the aisle debating the merits of eggs.
They cannot buy those eggs
They are unethical eggs
Conceived without morals
and no thought for animal welfare.

There are other eggs
Which are happy and ethical
because the chickens involved
must obviously have provided consent.

It is unclear
which eggs represent them best
and they wish to make an informed purchase
so none are bought
Just milk, sugar and other foods
which have horrible production methods
many use slaves
but we don't need to think about them
because they are not made
by friendly birds
Nine naked Men just walking down the road will cause a heap of trouble for all concerned.

LMNO

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #3 on: April 29, 2016, 04:10:37 pm »
Wow.

If this gets some momentum, I see a new project in the works...

Q. G. Pennyworth

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #4 on: April 29, 2016, 04:22:20 pm »
Hairs on the back of my neck! Somehow reminded me of When the Wind Blows

Looks like the kind of movie I have to skip for sanity's sake, but I appreciate the comparison :)
Overheating Pheremone Pustule of Last Saturday's Jiggle Fun| _xgeWireToEvent: Unknown extension 131, this should never happen.

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The Good Reverend Roger

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #5 on: April 29, 2016, 06:55:39 pm »
We scurry down the trench line
Like rats (and we have many examples to emulate)
Masked, dog-snouted against phosgene
Chlorine, and mustard gas
25% casualties in a daring and successful mission
We get the colonel his eggs for breakfast because
No silly war stops a proper English gentleman from doing so.
« Last Edit: April 29, 2016, 07:27:32 pm by The Good Reverend Roger »
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LMNO

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #6 on: April 29, 2016, 07:09:30 pm »
Yes.  That.

Q. G. Pennyworth

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #7 on: May 31, 2018, 05:17:04 pm »
bamp
Overheating Pheremone Pustule of Last Saturday's Jiggle Fun| _xgeWireToEvent: Unknown extension 131, this should never happen.

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Hoopla

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #8 on: May 31, 2018, 05:43:20 pm »
I missed this the first time. Holy shit! Thanks for bumping.
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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #9 on: May 31, 2018, 10:05:27 pm »
Look at these precious eggs
The last of their kind
Extinction is never a happy thought
I should probably buy these eggs
To preserve biodiversity
What the hell is a guinea worm, anyway?
I was a teen-aged shit-poster; as you can see, the condition became chronic.

tyrannosaurus vex

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #10 on: June 02, 2018, 11:16:30 pm »
Eggs, eggs,
The magical fruit.
The more you eat,
The fewer potential chickens are born to wrest control of the means of production from the cold, uncaring hands of the ruling class.
The fewer potential chickens are born to wrest control of the means of production from the cold, uncaring hands of the ruling class,
the better you feel.
So let's have eggs
for every meal.
Evil and Unfeeling Arse-Flenser From The City of the Damned.

Cramulus

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #11 on: June 05, 2018, 08:56:18 pm »
this is fantastic

thatsmyapple

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #12 on: June 08, 2018, 12:01:34 am »
Wow.

If this gets some momentum, I see a new project in the works...

Agreed. Bravo @Q. G. Pennyworth

Doktor Howl

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #13 on: June 11, 2018, 09:43:05 pm »
Quote
if eggs = 12 and QGstatus = "purchase" then eggs = 0 else eggs = eggs + 1
get QGstatus
return

Amazing that 3 little lines of code could bring down an advanced civilization.

 
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Q. G. Pennyworth

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Re: I don't know if I should buy these eggs.
« Reply #14 on: June 11, 2018, 11:13:41 pm »

Eh?
Overheating Pheremone Pustule of Last Saturday's Jiggle Fun| _xgeWireToEvent: Unknown extension 131, this should never happen.

Don't fucking judge me, I've got tentacles for a face.