I have been all over the world and two things are constant every place I have gone. HUMANS ARE STUPID and SHUT UP. These facts are incontrovertible. I mean, I am also stupid, but MY stupid MAKES SENSE. I may have gotten my tongue stuck in a Epson tractor feed printer in 1996, but I don't say things like "LOWERING TAXES WILL RAISE PROSPERITY. WE MEAN IT THIS TIME." or "OUR OWN INDEPENDENT NUCLEAR DETERRENT HAS HELPED TO KEEP THE PEACE FOR NEARLY 40 YEARS." I may not understand everything there is to know about LGBT issues and Black issues and women's issues but I KNOW THEY HAVE ISSUES and I am not here to FLOG EVERYONE THAT DOESN'T HAVE A PERFECT UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A GAY BLACK JEWISH WOMAN, thus absolutely alienating the people I am *supposedly* trying to CONVINCE.
That's the HUMANS ARE STUPID part. The SHUT UP part is SELF-EVIDENT. Either RANT YOUR GUTS OUT or SHUT UP. There is no room between those two things in THIS particular day and age, but THAT'S OKAY, because I am up for ANY PROGRAM. I have PULLED THE WOOL over my own eyes, only my delusions don't seem very safe. They involve melting icecaps and Divine teaching me how to do the Charleston, the DEVIL'S OWN DANCE. My head is a noisy, crowded place that never HEARD of a fire inspector.
Is your head also out of code? I hope so, brothers and sisters, because if you look around, HOW WELL HAS THAT CODE BEEN WORKING ON A SOCIETAL LEVEL? That's right, it's like the Cotton Club fire in this shit EVERY DAY and your exceptionalism will not save you. Nothing will save you. Not even "Bob", though he will at least make sure you look good while you are trampled by the other club-hoppers.
And if your head IS out of code, have you spouted about it? Have you LAUGHED SO HARD YOUR JAW UNHINGED? Have you ranted, or will you just plain SHUT UP?
One or the other, brothers and sisters, one or the other. The ONE THING that ALL THE GODS HATE is "whataboutists" (and, of course, no-fault insurance). Either you are FOR the jackboots of an out-of-control state, or you are AGAINST them. Either you are FOR stupid, self-destructive primates, or you are AGAINST them.
As a great man once said "Your car broke down and an animal just ran off with your show and the car is sinking and your wife screaming...But NEVER GIVE UP THAT SHIP." He was right. He ranted AND he SHUT UP and while that is beyond the ability of most people, it is worth emulating. So fuck you. I might have one shoe and my car and my wife might be down a bog somewhere, but I GOT MY HEAD STRAIGHT. You should work on that.
OR KILL ME.
