Author Topic: LMNO-PI  (Read 76467 times)

Irreverend Hugh, KSC

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« Reply #45 on: March 30, 2005, 02:12:22 pm »
Quote from: Hoshiko
Quote from: Irreverend Hugh, KSC
LMNO=Bush Hater



I think Erin would disagree.


This is getting GOOD. Math and the Open Bar...  8)


Bars>America

And

Bush+USarmy=DOOM (it's not just for the poor anymore!)
"Time for the tin-foil hats, girls and boys!"

fluffy

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« Reply #46 on: March 30, 2005, 08:30:24 pm »

::happily munches carrot and spinach salad::

i love detective stories

Malaul

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« Reply #47 on: March 31, 2005, 12:35:22 am »
I hate waiting for the next part to coem in

I WANNA MOREEEEEEEEEEEEE
Coito ergo sum
O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem!
"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy,the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick, and Colon.  --Comedian Chris Rock

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« Reply #48 on: March 31, 2005, 12:41:27 am »
Me, too. Math and the Open Bar and pancakes and collective trolls and face-raping bats and so much more. Wow! Hurry up and write more, L.!!!!
just like in a dream
you'll open your mouth to scream
and you won't make a sound

you can't believe your eyes
you can't believe your ears
you can't believe your friends
you can't believe you're here

Bob the Mediocre

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« Reply #49 on: March 31, 2005, 01:08:22 am »
I'm just wondering how the collective troll thing'll turn out.

Oh, and I'm enjoying the story too.  :D
"we are building a religion
we are making a brand
we're the only ones to turn to when your castles turn to sand
take a bite of this apple
mister corporate events
take a walk through the jungle
of cardboard shanties and tents
some people drink pepsi
some people drink coke
the wacky morning dj says democracy's a joke
he says now do you believe in the one big song
he is now accepting callers who would like to sing along"


I AM A COMPLETE AND UTTER FUCKING IDIOT!

Sepia

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« Reply #50 on: March 31, 2005, 01:27:48 am »
yea, eagerly awaiting next chapter.
Everyone will always be too late

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« Reply #51 on: March 31, 2005, 01:42:43 pm »
As she stepped out of the car, Erin said, Youve got to be kidding me.  

We were standing in front of a narrow door, attached to a cramped, squat, suspiciously non-Euclidian building sandwiched between two hulking behemoth towers that loomed overhead, windows shattered like broken teeth, or spare eye sockets gouged out of the walls.

I know, I know.  They like a certain sense of mystery abut it.  Makes em feel dangerous.  I took her hand (the sensation of my fingers entwining with her made me think of copulating Seraphim, of snakes in the spring), and led her to the door.  Hey, OB! I shouted at the door.

Who are They? Erin whispered.  I didnt have a chance to answer, as the surface of the door swelled, and suddenly had the appearance of a round, friendly face, about three times the size of a normal head.

L, how are you?  IThe huge eyes rolled towards Erin, and scowled.  Erin let out a muffled shriek and flinched back, as the door looked her up and down.  What do you think youre doing, L?

Shes a client, OB.  Play nice.  We were just assaulted by a cell phone.

You sure?  She looks too good to be one of yoursĶ

Hey, thanks a lot, OB!  Now, are you going to let us in, or am I gonna have to do this the hard way?

The door grinned, Oh, I was just kidding.  We know your credit is good here.  Cmon in.  The face disappeared, and the door was a door again.

Erin looked at me quizzically.  Whats the hard way?

I chuckled.  Darling, there is no hard way.  The Open Bar likes to play that its just a little kid, having awoken only a few months ago.  But really, it basically could control everything that happens in itself.  This includes entering.  Its a good thing we raised the energy through sex and not violence.  I wouldnt want that much negative energy in one consciousness.  I prefer his silly goof at immaturity.

OBs face popped out of the door again.  I heard that.

You were supposed to.  The face disappeared again, and I grabbed the doorknob.  Turning to Erin, I said, you ready for this? as I swung the door open.

I guess soĶ Holy shit!  On the other side of the door was an enormous room, wood-paneled, with large wooden columns supporting a stories-high vaulted roof.  There were tables scattered about, an enormous mahogany bar with brass railings, a stage off to one side, and what looked to be private rooms in back.  Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds cover of All Tomorrows Parties emanated from nowhere in particular.  The place was about three-quarters full, and filled with all sorts of odd types: Scrabblers, Emo kids, Metalheads, Drunken Buddhists, Renegade Kareokists, and the Ubiquitous Barflys.  I led Erin over to the bar, where a man with an enormous polystyrene nose was wiping a glass down with his shirttail.

Hey, Mangrove, two martinis.

He looked up.  LMNO, havent seen you here in a while.  Whos the lovely lady?

Ah, yes.  Erin, this is Mangrove.  Mangrove, Erin.

A pleasure, Mangrove said, as two martini glasses filled with expensive gin and a lemon rind delicately twisted along the rims materialized in front of us.  Erin looked at them dubiously.

Its ok, I said.  Look up.

The ceiling was barely visible, as there were oddly shimmering darts of light folding in upon themselves, in a perpetual mobius strip of color and illumination.  What is that? asked Erin, enraptured.  I turned to her to answer, and was momentarily caught up in the sense of wonder she radiated, the raucous noise of the bar dimmed, the rest of the world faded away.

Um.  The, ahĶ  I followed her gaze up, and came back to myself.  Those are the collapsing wave states.  Theyre what made the Open Bar.  When you concentrate hard enough, one of the wave states will fold the universe into what you were thinking about.  Thats how we got this place to look the way it does.  Apparently, OB can fold space-time.  Mang here decided that a good bar should always be almost full, but never packed, because it adds to a atmosphere of solidarity and community.  Or Something.  Did I get that right?

Indubitably, L.  Now miss... Erin, was it?

Yes.

ĶErin.  LMNO tends to get snobbish about his drinks, I was wondering if you would like anything other than the bitter taste of gin?  Mangrove had a sly grin on his face as he asked.  I knew what he was up to.

Erin smiled back.  A white wine, if you please.  Sauvignon Blanc, preferably.

Absolutely.  A chilled glass of wine appeared in front of her.  I decided to step in before things got out of hand.

Mang, were looking for Aini.

Why the fuck would you deliberately look for her?

Face-Raping BatĶ  Its a long story.  Ill tell you later.  Anyway, is she around?

Back corner.  Just look for the large amount of people deliberately avoiding her.

Thanks.  I grabbed my glass, and took a long pull.  This was gonna be tough.  One more thing, Mang, I said.

What, pray tell?

Lemme get a cold wrought-iron crowbar.
LMNO
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Buy the Chao te Ching, or be doomed forever.

http://www.stonybrook.edu/sb/marburger/index.shtml

"Get offa me, you freaks!  This is not North Korea.  No.  This is America, and I expect to be PAID for that sort of nonsense.  In advance.  No credit...Cash on the barrelhead or GTFO.  I swear to God, there's nothing more annoying than commie perverts who don't understand the intrinsic value of the free market system."

Great Teacher Largo

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« Reply #52 on: March 31, 2005, 01:45:50 pm »
I've not done this in a long time, but.

/me lols.

LMNO, this shit is great.  Absolutely great.  Please, take me as your disciple, oh great master, that I may learn you to convey my insanity in such a deceptively lucid form.

Now hurry up and spit out the next one!
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

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« Reply #53 on: March 31, 2005, 03:03:50 pm »
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
I've not done this in a long time, but.

/me lols.

LMNO, this shit is great.  Absolutely great.  Please, take me as your disciple, oh great master, that I may learn you to convey my insanity in such a deceptively lucid form.


LMNO
Pope/Wrought Iron Instigator
First Church of Last Exit Before Toll
The Spider Project.

Buy the Chao te Ching, or be doomed forever.

http://www.stonybrook.edu/sb/marburger/index.shtml

"Get offa me, you freaks!  This is not North Korea.  No.  This is America, and I expect to be PAID for that sort of nonsense.  In advance.  No credit...Cash on the barrelhead or GTFO.  I swear to God, there's nothing more annoying than commie perverts who don't understand the intrinsic value of the free market system."

Malaul

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« Reply #54 on: March 31, 2005, 03:13:46 pm »
:shock:
Coito ergo sum
O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem!
"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy,the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dick, and Colon.  --Comedian Chris Rock

Great Teacher Largo

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« Reply #55 on: March 31, 2005, 05:35:52 pm »
Quote from: LMNO
Quote from: Great Teacher Largo
I've not done this in a long time, but.

/me lols.

LMNO, this shit is great.  Absolutely great.  Please, take me as your disciple, oh great master, that I may learn you to convey my insanity in such a deceptively lucid form.




Right, right.  What next?
"Any sufficiently tentacled spheroid is indistinguishable from the Great Cthulhu." -- Watashi

"Never attribute to Cthulhu what can adequately be explained by Dagon." -- Miskatonic Razor

"Everything but Sterility can be inherited.  None of your direct ancestors died childless." -- Red Queen

Note to filmmakers of the future: bad dialog leads to anger, bad directing leads to hatred, shallow action sequences lead to suffering. Farming out a movie to a corporation of computer animators is a path to the dark side of filmmaking.

High Inquisitor of the LMNO Society of Discordians (LSD)

It is dark.  You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

This Poster is Owned and Operated by the Frobozz Magic Co., Ltd.

Mangrove

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« Reply #56 on: March 31, 2005, 06:16:51 pm »
LMNO - this story is shaping up rather nicely. And I can tell you that OB is very pleased with his characterization. He's shorter IRL...think you boosted his self esteem.
What makes it so? Making it so is what makes it so.

LMNO, PhD (life continues)

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« Reply #57 on: March 31, 2005, 06:27:03 pm »
Thanks, Mang... Looks like you made the cut, too...
LMNO
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First Church of Last Exit Before Toll
The Spider Project.

Buy the Chao te Ching, or be doomed forever.

http://www.stonybrook.edu/sb/marburger/index.shtml

"Get offa me, you freaks!  This is not North Korea.  No.  This is America, and I expect to be PAID for that sort of nonsense.  In advance.  No credit...Cash on the barrelhead or GTFO.  I swear to God, there's nothing more annoying than commie perverts who don't understand the intrinsic value of the free market system."

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« Reply #58 on: March 31, 2005, 07:11:20 pm »
Quote from: LMNO
Thanks, Mang... Looks like you made the cut, too...


yes, he did....though i think my part is better  :D

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« Reply #59 on: March 31, 2005, 07:13:03 pm »
I figured you would, my friend...
LMNO
Pope/Wrought Iron Instigator
First Church of Last Exit Before Toll
The Spider Project.

Buy the Chao te Ching, or be doomed forever.

http://www.stonybrook.edu/sb/marburger/index.shtml

"Get offa me, you freaks!  This is not North Korea.  No.  This is America, and I expect to be PAID for that sort of nonsense.  In advance.  No credit...Cash on the barrelhead or GTFO.  I swear to God, there's nothing more annoying than commie perverts who don't understand the intrinsic value of the free market system."