Author Topic: Give us your best philosophy joke  (Read 17632 times)

Shibboleet The Annihilator

  • The
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 48326
    • View Profile
    • .
Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #15 on: September 08, 2005, 01:58:49 am »
Ok, that was funny.

The Good Reverend Roger

  • Horrible Bastard
  • One-Armed Jizz Moppers
  • Deserved It
  • **
  • Posts: 36736
    • View Profile
Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #16 on: September 08, 2005, 02:00:03 am »
Quote from: East Coast Hustle
d'you hear about the buddhist that refused novocaine when he got a root canal?



he wanted to transcend dental medication.

 8)


Oh, yeah. :lol:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

the other anonymous

  • Pink spraypaint
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 3559
    • View Profile
    • http://toa267.deviantart.com/
Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #17 on: September 08, 2005, 06:54:33 am »
Quote from: fnordiscordia
http://photos1.blogger.com/img/143/1515/640/this%20is%20not%20funny%20clown.jpg


Descartes: Senses cannot be trusted, therefore everything might be an illusion. However, the fact that Descartes doubted is not in doubt. Therefore, nothing exists except the self.

Zen Buddhists: Reality is. The self is an illusion built out of false concepts of identity and individuality. All is one.

Don't you get it?

Quote from: fnordiscordia
STFU


Never! I now realize the errors of my ways! IF WE STFU, THEN THE "BOB" DOLE'S HAVE WON!!

Shibboleet The Annihilator

  • The
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 48326
    • View Profile
    • .
Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #18 on: September 08, 2005, 07:00:00 am »

Cain

  • Alea iacta est
  • Chekha
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 105001
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #19 on: February 26, 2009, 12:33:07 pm »
Bump

Mangrove

  • Founder of the David Foster Wallace Appreciation Society
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 11769
    • View Profile
What makes it so? Making it so is what makes it so.

Hoopla

  • gives people the beeps
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 29918
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #21 on: February 27, 2009, 04:28:59 pm »
:rimshot:
"Soon, all of us will have special names." -Professor Brian O'Blivion

"Now's not the time to get silly, so wear your big boots and jump on the garbage clowns." -Bob Dylan?

"I contradict myself?  Very well then, I contradict myself; I am large - I contain multitudes."  -Walt Whitman

The Good Reverend Roger

  • Horrible Bastard
  • One-Armed Jizz Moppers
  • Deserved It
  • **
  • Posts: 36736
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #22 on: February 28, 2009, 06:01:17 am »
Why do anarchists drink herbal tea?













Because property is theft.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*spew*
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

 "Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Vegetable Sadist

  • Known
  • *
  • Posts: 31
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #23 on: March 03, 2009, 10:42:47 pm »
Two behaviorists are having sex. One says to the other "That was good for you, how was it for me?"


Honestly, thats the best I have.

rong

  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 15386
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #24 on: March 03, 2009, 11:23:49 pm »
why did the existentialist go to the eye doctor?

















because he was now sighted
"he was a smart feller who felt smart"

Idiot

  • Known & Noted
  • **
  • Posts: 81
    • View Profile
    • http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=888101
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #25 on: March 14, 2009, 11:54:22 am »
you

the other anonymous

  • Pink spraypaint
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 3559
    • View Profile
    • http://toa267.deviantart.com/
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #26 on: April 03, 2009, 04:15:47 am »
Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: That's not funny.


One time, Jehovah's Witnesses came to my door while I was changing my nephew's diaper, and they were all like "Oh, I can see you're busy" and they stood there and watched...

-toa,
rule 34 on diaper rash? time to log the fuck off!

Doktor Howl

  • SHIT FIXER
  • One-Armed Jizz Moppers
  • Deserved It
  • **
  • Posts: 385932
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #27 on: July 30, 2013, 06:05:03 pm »
Once there was a student of a Guru, who was always asking his master for a hit of the great stuff he was on- but the Master always said no.

Then one night, the Master decided to give the studen a chance. He sent the student home, then dressed in rags, smeared shit on his face, and followed his pupil screaming "DRINK MY PISS! DRINK MY PISS!"

The student was frightened and ran. The Master ran after him still screaming, "DRINK MY PISS! DRINK MY PISS!" Finnaly he cornered the student, but the boy punched him and got away.

If only the student had realized- The drug passed through the urine.
So he missed his chance.

Bu-dum-bum- ching!

BUMP

Scott The Cuck

  • Certified Prevention Specialist
  • Deserved It
  • ****
  • Posts: 34492
  • Can one really say that pot isn't reckless?
    • View Profile
    • Preventing another Big Tobacco
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #28 on: July 31, 2013, 03:15:09 am »
A HFT takes a shower, and goes outside for a walk.
It is my duty as a parent to stop the the weed basket of the east from bringing its variety of societal ills.

There is nothing wrong with being a cuckold. All love is sacred.

Pere Ubu

  • SHITR!
  • Known & Noted
  • **
  • Posts: 1067
  • SaboTabby Loves You
    • View Profile
Re: Give us your best philosophy joke
« Reply #29 on: October 07, 2013, 08:40:53 pm »
Best philosophy joke?


Ayn Rand.

If you meet Eris on the road, YOU WERE PROBABLY HOLDING THE MAP UPSIDE DOWN, DUMBASS.

Grand Episkopos and Lord High Executioner of The Temple Of The Screaming Finger