New Ford cop cars

[Suu]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

You. Masshole.

Lol.

[Don Coyote]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

Douchebag.

In some more civilized portions of the world it doesn't matter. Passing is passing.

[Precious Moments Zalgo]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

If you know they want to pass you, then why don't you get over into the slower lane so they don't have to pass you on the right?

[Don Coyote]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

If you know they want to pass you, then why don't you get over into the slower lane so they don't have to pass you on the right?

But how will he win at driving?

[BadBeast]

I particularly like the way the Fuckwit who comes on first, say "We want our vehicles that we're coming out with, to protect and serve the Officers" Is it me, or is he hijacking the whole idea of "Protect and Serve"?

[Jasper]

The only thing people like him understand is protecting and serving the bottom line.  To him, cops are just customers with government funding.

[Eater of Clowns]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

If you know they want to pass you, then why don't you get over into the slower lane so they don't have to pass you on the right?

But how will he win at driving?

Brilliant suggestions, I wish I'd thought of them.  Guess I'm just too focused on trying to "win" driving or some stupid bullshit.

Next time I'm in the middle lane, you know, the traveling lane, and a car comes up behind me with a wide open path on either side and inexplicably chooses the right, I won't be such a douchebag about it.  They're welcome to act however they like until the day they do the same thing to somebody who's trying to change lanes right in a hurry and, just this once, didn't check their blind spot for the asshole who took the wrong path around them.

Passing is not just passing.  The right is a car's means of escape in order to access the break down lane in a hurry, try to get to an exit, or avoid danger.  So long as you are passing people on their left, that means you have constant control and awareness of what's going on on your right, meaning you can be ready for unlikely shit.  If you've got a prick passing you on your right, now you have an unnecessary danger.

Pass on the fucking left.  And in the same vein, once you've passed on the left get the fuck out of the passing lane to let others behind you do the same thing.  It'll clear up the road a bit and you won't have to worry about massholes like myself getting agitated enough to start correcting your poor decisions using a bit of maneuvering.

[Don Coyote]

ITT: A douchbag justifies driving in a reckless manner because someone else doing something that pisses him off might endanger other people.

[Phox]

You forgot that being an asshole to them will make them repent their evil ways, and they won't do it to someone else.

[BadBeast]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

If you know they want to pass you, then why don't you get over into the slower lane so they don't have to pass you on the right?

But how will he win at driving?

Brilliant suggestions, I wish I'd thought of them.  Guess I'm just too focused on trying to "win" driving or some stupid bullshit.

Next time I'm in the middle lane, you know, the traveling lane, and a car comes up behind me with a wide open path on either side and inexplicably chooses the right, I won't be such a douchebag about it.  They're welcome to act however they like until the day they do the same thing to somebody who's trying to change lanes right in a hurry and, just this once, didn't check their blind spot for the asshole who took the wrong path around them.

Passing is not just passing.  The right is a car's means of escape in order to access the break down lane in a hurry, try to get to an exit, or avoid danger.  So long as you are passing people on their left, that means you have constant control and awareness of what's going on on your right, meaning you can be ready for unlikely shit.  If you've got a prick passing you on your right, now you have an unnecessary danger.

Pass on the fucking left.  And in the same vein, once you've passed on the left get the fuck out of the passing lane to let others behind you do the same thing.  It'll clear up the road a bit and you won't have to worry about massholes like myself getting agitated enough to start correcting your poor decisions using a bit of maneuvering.

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

If you know they want to pass you, then why don't you get over into the slower lane so they don't have to pass you on the right?

But how will he win at driving?

Brilliant suggestions, I wish I'd thought of them.  Guess I'm just too focused on trying to "win" driving or some stupid bullshit.

Next time I'm in the middle lane, you know, the traveling lane, and a car comes up behind me with a wide open path on either side and inexplicably chooses the right, I won't be such a douchebag about it.  They're welcome to act however they like until the day they do the same thing to somebody who's trying to change lanes right in a hurry and, just this once, didn't check their blind spot for the asshole who took the wrong path around them.

Passing is not just passing.  The right is a car's means of escape in order to access the break down lane in a hurry, try to get to an exit, or avoid danger.  So long as you are passing people on their left, that means you have constant control and awareness of what's going on on your right, meaning you can be ready for unlikely shit.  If you've got a prick passing you on your right, now you have an unnecessary danger.

Pass on the fucking left.  And in the same vein, once you've passed on the left get the fuck out of the passing lane to let others behind you do the same thing.  It'll clear up the road a bit and you won't have to worry about massholes like myself getting agitated enough to start correcting your poor decisions using a bit of maneuvering.

Don't even think about trying that "Pass on the left" nonsense over here Sunshine, or you'll end up getting flattened by an Articulated Lorry.  

[Don Coyote]

You forgot that being an asshole to them will make them repent their evil ways, and they won't do it to someone else.

Yes, fucking with someone on freeway never ever pisses them off. In fact studies have shown a 69% increase in positive chi-feelings in victimsrecipients of aggressive drivingbeing cut offbeing gently shown why passing to the right is wrong with your car.

[Eater of Clowns]

ITT: A douchbag justifies driving in a reckless manner because someone else doing something that pisses him off might endanger other people.

Driving in a reckless manner?  Who said anything about cutting off and whatnot?  You're assigning that one yourself, Coyote.  I said I'll get them back and, yeah, I will, but that's not by cutting people off or even tailgating them.  It's a very simple matter of positioning.  If I'm where they want to be, they can't be there, and when it looks like just another car doing its part on the road.

You see, the freeway is much like the internet, Coyote.  There are people who are pretty level headed until some cockbag comes along and makes a bunch of snide fucking remarks in direct refusal to acknowledge the meaning of the words actually being said.  Maybe you're alright with that happening in response to a bit of hyperbole (really, you can't tell from "righteous arbiter of justice"?) but I'm not.  Much like I'm not okay with someone pulling some dangerous shit on the highway.

You forgot that being an asshole to them will make them repent their evil ways, and they won't do it to someone else.

Gosh, Phox, you've unlocked the secret.  So keep being an asshole to me, so that I'll repent my evil ways and won't do it to someone else.   

[Phox]

You forgot that being an asshole to them will make them repent their evil ways, and they won't do it to someone else.

Gosh, Phox, you've unlocked the secret.  So keep being an asshole to me, so that I'll repent my evil ways and won't do it to someone else.   

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought I was following your logic pretty well.

[Eater of Clowns]

I am the righteous arbiter of justice on the road.  Tailgating me on the highway because you're trying to pass me and I'm in the high speed lane, that's fine.  Passing me on the right?  You. are. fucked.  I will go so grossly out of my own convenience to fuck you over as badly as I possibly can.  I will make you miss your exit, I will trap you behind the minivan on the far right moving at a crawl and braking inexplicably.  You have never seen pure evil so singularly personified as in that surprisingly agile beat up little Civic as it cuts your only path in the traffic you've been weaving around in like a dickbag.  Do not pass me on the right.

You. Masshole.

Lol.

I just want to say thanks to Suu for apparently being the only one that actually got the point of this post.  I would say I'm disappointed by a few of you, but this is actually completely in line with the shitheadedness I'd expect from those who delivered on it.

I'd also like to thank PMZ for at least trying to make a conversation out of it instead of turning on some bland insults and little "morally correct" insinuations.

Phox and Coyote.  Just get fucked.  It was a poor decision of me to attempt to explain my reasoning when all you're looking for is to casually toss out some insults.

I'll apologize for my part in the derail.

[Phox]

Aside from making sarcastic comments, how did I insult you, exactly?