We're never gonna survive...

[P3nT4gR4m]

"Stay calm" they tell me. "Don't lose your shit", "Keep your arms inside the vehicle", "Walk, don't run"

I have an inherent mistrust of anyone who isn't at least a little bit crazy. The human brain was not designed to process the trainwreck freakshow clusterfuck that is the modern world in all it's ridiculous glory, without blowing the odd gasket or fuse.

If your reaction to human civilisation does not involve a tinge of wide eyed stare, panting and/or foaming at the mouth then, frankly, you make me nervous and, frankly, I find it difficult to relate to you as a member of the same species. Do not expect any help onto the lifeboat when we're drowning in the latest puke-tsunami. I don't want people like you (people who think puke-tsunamis are normal acceptable phenomena) anywhere near my fucking lifeboat and I will beat you with my paddle, repeatedly, until you sink, if you even so much as look as if you're swimming my way.

Life is short. Life is pain. Life is a box of chocolates full of broken glass and LSD. We're born, we're trained to be slaves and look away while corporate puppets, with no one pulling the strings bend us over and fuck us til our spleens erupt. Then we die. That's right. No one makes it off this planet alive. What would you do if you had one day left to live?

If the answer to that question is not "I would go fucking crazy and get fucked up and fuck shit up" then do not approach my lifeboat. Thing is I have more than one day left to live but, in the grand scheme of things, it's not really all that much longer. Do I stay calm? Do I keep a hold of my shit? Do I keep my arms inside the vehicle? Do I walk? Do I fuck as like!! And I'll happily take a shit on the well manicured lawn of anyone who does. Does that make me crazy?

I sure as hell hope so.

[Reginald Ret]

AAARGLBARGH!
Yeah, I agree.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

If I had a day left to live I'd probably want to spend it with my kids, maybe go out to sushi, go for a hike, run my dog, have a last beer and burrito with R&D, go out to the farms for one last smell of the fresh bounty, have one last dinner with my friends and drink too much wine, give one last hug and kiss and I love you to the people who rely on me to be there and try to make sure everything was as close to in order for them to go on with their lives as it could be, and make sure they knew where the hose is so they can hose your shit off my lawn.

[P3nT4gR4m]

If I had a day left to live I'd probably want to spend it with my kids, maybe go out to sushi, go for a hike, run my dog, have a last beer and burrito with R&D, go out to the farms for one last smell of the fresh bounty, have one last dinner with my friends and drink too much wine, give one last hug and kiss and I love you to the people who rely on me to be there and try to make sure everything was as close to in order for them to go on with their lives as it could be, and make sure they knew where the hose is so they can hose your shit off my lawn.

Touche 

I wish I had your life. Well not your exact life, obviously. We're different people. Your life would have me climbing the walls, just as, I expect, mine would have you doing the same. But you seem to have an inner peace or a contentment that I'm still working on. Hopefully I'll get there one day. Hopefully before I've smashed up, set fire to and taken a shit on pretty much everything there is to be contented with.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

If I had a day left to live I'd probably want to spend it with my kids, maybe go out to sushi, go for a hike, run my dog, have a last beer and burrito with R&D, go out to the farms for one last smell of the fresh bounty, have one last dinner with my friends and drink too much wine, give one last hug and kiss and I love you to the people who rely on me to be there and try to make sure everything was as close to in order for them to go on with their lives as it could be, and make sure they knew where the hose is so they can hose your shit off my lawn.

Touche 

I wish I had your life. Well not your exact life, obviously. We're different people. Your life would have me climbing the walls, just as, I expect, mine would have you doing the same. But you seem to have an inner peace or a contentment that I'm still working on. Hopefully I'll get there one day. Hopefully before I've smashed up, set fire to and taken a shit on pretty much everything there is to be contented with.

I think that what I have is not so different from what you have, in that I am a person who is wracked with pain and anger and regret and self-doubt, but while sometimes I exorcise that by going balls-to-the-wall and living life as hard as I can live it before I hit the end of the world and tip off, more often I exorcise it by living the littlest things really really hard, wherein the littlest things might be cutting up and roasting a squash picked from my best friend's back yard, and toasting the seeds for my smallest child to eat. Focusing on that moment, the smell of the squash roasting in the oven and the excitement on my daughter's face as she grabs the salty warm seeds off the cookie sheet and crunches them, the small noises of pleasure she makes as she eats.

THIS is the kind of thing that keeps me from getting in my car and following the highways North, which is an urge I used to indulge but can't anymore because I have small ones and a new idea of a future for myself. If I hadn't become a mother things would probably be very different, if I was even still alive.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

(I don't really have a lawn, can't stand the things. My yard is a tangle of flowers and brambles and rhubarb and roses and sunchokes.)

[P3nT4gR4m]

If I had a day left to live I'd probably want to spend it with my kids, maybe go out to sushi, go for a hike, run my dog, have a last beer and burrito with R&D, go out to the farms for one last smell of the fresh bounty, have one last dinner with my friends and drink too much wine, give one last hug and kiss and I love you to the people who rely on me to be there and try to make sure everything was as close to in order for them to go on with their lives as it could be, and make sure they knew where the hose is so they can hose your shit off my lawn.

Touche 

I wish I had your life. Well not your exact life, obviously. We're different people. Your life would have me climbing the walls, just as, I expect, mine would have you doing the same. But you seem to have an inner peace or a contentment that I'm still working on. Hopefully I'll get there one day. Hopefully before I've smashed up, set fire to and taken a shit on pretty much everything there is to be contented with.

I think that what I have is not so different from what you have, in that I am a person who is wracked with pain and anger and regret and self-doubt, but while sometimes I exorcise that by going balls-to-the-wall and living life as hard as I can live it before I hit the end of the world and tip off, *snip

Weird. I wouldn't say I'm wracked with pain, anger and regret and self doubt as much as I'm wracked by how fucking bored I get with the drudgery of life but my chosen solution is along the same lines - "balls-to-the-wall and living life as hard as I can live it" It's when my balls spend too long, too far away from the wall that I begin to get twitchy. This "little details" thing I've tried and had limited success with but the balls end up exercising veto and demanding we visit a wall, before too long.

I'm hoping I'll mellow with age. Actually I am mellowing with age. I guess maybe I just need to be patient and get a bit older...