Intermittens #6

[Cainad (dec.)]

Okay, so we're talking about content that describe what we would consider basic Discordian "theory and practice," but with a special emphasis on making up bullshit claims about how IT WILL CHANGE YUOR LIFE, a la McOccultism?

[Rococo Modem Basilisk]

I thought it was theory and practice smattered with tonnes of bullshit, like The Anarchist Cookbook. (No, smoking bananas will not get you high.)

There's no reason we can't do both.

[Telarus]

If we don't have a cover, I'd offer a version of my Five fingered hand (see avatar). We can put 6 random bullshit meme symbols at each point of the hexagram, and a bold 5=6 floating somewhere.

I may have some other content to contribute to this one.

[P3nT4gR4m]

Okay, so we're talking about content that describe what we would consider basic Discordian "theory and practice," but with a special emphasis on making up bullshit claims about how IT WILL CHANGE YUOR LIFE, a la McOccultism?

Zing! I think we're pretty much on the same page here. I love the evangelical tone of Crowley in the intro to theory and practice, defo need to throw in some of that. The ridiculous claims and pseudo science gobshite of the new age and neopagan literature will also be applied to discrodian thought paradigms.

For example, imagine a suitably "authentic" looking gardnerian spell illustrating the law of fives.

For my own part I came across discordia on the back of a long period of occult study and, from what I gather, there's quite a few on this board alone who have a similar background or ongoing interest in these kind of semantic systems.

I don't want this release to be any form of mystical system of whatever but I do think it'd work really well in the style of a caricature or lampoon of some of the classics. If there's a ritual described it should be obvious (like it was in the original PD) that it's a piss take but, at the same time, if a cabbage reads it and is convinced enough to try it then all the better.

[Cainad (dec.)]

Oh yes, now I definitely get it.

Some source material --> http://www.academyofsorcery.com/

Now you can master the art and science of commanding omnipotent supernatural beings, including: fallen-angles, demons, the rulers of unearthly mystic dimensions, and even the embodiments of the elements (sylphs, salamanders, gnomes, and so on.)

You'll discover how normal people have learned to enlist the service of spirits -- entities -- and elementals to get what they want out of life.  Whether it be the destruction of a terrible menace, the whereabouts of a powerful occult artifact or perhaps an increase of money and popularity.

Yes, this is the REAL stuff they don't want you to know about.  Banned from bookstores, prohibited by churches -- it's all here!

But before you get excited and wonder about all the possibilities magic powers will grant you let me be first to remind you: REAL Magic & Sorcery isn't for just any average Joe surfing the web...  in fact it many not even be for you...

From: Abraxas
Academy Founder

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

This is beautiful.

[Triple Zero]

p3nt you must use that WORLD > EYE > DOT (you are here) diagram somewhere, cause it's awesome.

also more fonts, free and nicely catalogued for you on urbanfonts.com

[P3nT4gR4m]

p3nt you must use that WORLD > EYE > DOT (you are here) diagram somewhere, cause it's awesome.

also more fonts, free and nicely catalogued for you on urbanfonts.com

good call! Thanks for reminding me about that one.

also thnx for new fonts site - now I'll be twice as long choosing my typefaces 

[P3nT4gR4m]

I've found, whilst threadmining - the parable of the sacred bull by enrico

who is responsible for this? Is it kopyleft? Has it been published in anything else?

[Telarus]

It's in Issue01, page 33.

[P3nT4gR4m]

How in the fuck did I miss this? 

Damn threadmining turns to tunnel vision 

[Telarus]

Here's some graphics that I whipped up for a n00b thread in OM. You can use them for Issue 06:

[Sheered Völva]

Somehow I have a nagging suspicion this isn't entirely original. Somebody doing a bit of editing to an old piece, what?



By the way, one of the sentences ends "sing verses of some old"  I think a word's missing there. (It's by the picture of the girl in the dress holding a lethal-looking loaf).

[Telarus]

it was a real piece in a boys and girls magazine by one of my favorite Painters, Henry Bacon. All the artwork came with the article. All born of a Bacon joke. Thanks for the catch in panel 05.

[Telarus]

THE PROPITIATION OF ST GULIK
by Johnny Brainwash, Admiral to the Floating Republic of Mu

Upon Commencement Of A Journey (being a lesser rite of the KallistiCon Collective)

The driver* intones the blessing* of St. Gulik:
---
    O blessed St Gulik, beloved of hitchhikers,
protector of dumpster divers and others of much ilk,
ride shotgun with me.

May the highway patrol be distracted by shiny objects.
May the axe murderers give me a smile and a nod
and let me go on my way.

May the sun shine on my road, except when it rains.
May the beers be cold and my fellow travelers beautiful.
May the rental car* be blessed and brought into your fold.

And if you don't listen to prayer, then to hell with you.
---

The driver takes a sip of coffee*, and intones the mystical phrase:

"gabba gabba"

The cup is passed around the passengers, who repeat the driver's actions and words.

The driver next takes a nibble of a snack*, intones:

"gabba gabba"

and likewise passes the snack around.

When all have partaken, the driver breaks off a piece of the snack and places it underneath a tire
in such a manner that it will be run over when the car begins to roll. This is followed by a splash
of coffee, also beneath the tire, and the driver completes the incantation:

    Gabba gabba
    We accept you
    We accept you
    One of us


The driver finishes the coffee and snack, sharing with the passengers as desired.

Then the driver says "Let's go."*
~-~-~-~-~

*driver: or his designee, although the National League of Dynamic Discord refuses to accept
the designated driver rule.

*intones the blessing: Back in the day, it was traditional to give the entire blessing. In modern times,
however, the practice has arisen of posting the blessing to the internets and incorporating it by reference;
e.g., "O blessed St. Gulik, etc, etc. Go read the link yourself...."

*may this rental car: In cases where the vehicle is not a rental, or in fact not a car, the driver may
substitute "may this vehicle".

*coffee: or tea, or energy drink, or fizzy sugar-water. While this rite may be said to have roots in
Voudoun invocation, alcohols should be avoided for obvious reasons.

*snack: Cookies and chocolate are most traditional, but let's face it: Gulik is a cockroach. He'll eat
anything. The Venerable Red Vines of Kallisticon have been used to great effect, but they are few and
hard to come by.

*Let's go: or something equally clever.
______

______

NOTE: Among the other blessings for a traveler are;
~ sharing food or other needful items with fellow travelers,
~ choosing the nicer route over the faster one,
~ and picking up hitchhikers.

One should hold close the words of Beatus Ffungo, who said, "Traffic is people."


--------------------><-----------------------

Archivist Note (-Telarus, KSC):

This was posted to PDcom back in 07 as well, so you can look for the results of that era of the egregore
if you so choose (I noticed a lot of mis-forum noise, as it was posted in Or Kill Me). You may learn the
esoteric version of the chant there.

Also, I recommend performing this rite. Loudly. Audiences help, too. The sheer experience of rounding up a
car-ful of people just to make them look the fool in public then getting locked into a metal box moving at high speed
with them will teach you how ritual actually works. This ritual has launched 2 very successful KallistiCon journeys
for myself and others. I wonder what it would do to your day?