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Things are weird, and they're getting weirder at a rate that is not so much alarming as bemusing. A man walks into his house, howling. An eyeless vendor serves coffee in the courtyard. In the next stall, a man drips blood onto the floor.

And Mattel releases Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken.



http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/10/mattel_has_lost_their_minds.php

[I]

Personally, I plan to reproduce by donating to a sperm bank, that way I can pass on my DNA without the hassle of dealing with other people, combined with the unique added benefit of actually coming out ahead financially.

Even if they take your sperm (must have a very high count) most donors never get used. FYI.

SPS:

That sounds like you had a delightful time!

 

It used to be that leaving a bunch of weird shit on someone's porch actually surprised them. Now the ante's really up there. It takes Zalgo in the bathroom.

Fuck, I think that even Zalgo would be greeted with a resigned sense of "well, it had to happen eventually".

Actually, I'm pretty sure that Portland has the highest density of strip clubs in the US (suck it Vegas!). One of my uncles who lives down there can give directions anywhere in Portland using only strip clubs as markers.

Yes. If I remember correctly, Portland is #1 for the following, per capita:

Strip clubs
Sex stores
Restaurants
Bank robberies.

I was told that it is also the highest in breweries.

I would not be at all surprised.

And possibly independent coffee roasteries.

God, fantastic!

@Nigel-Thanks! 

@Cramulus-Awesome advice! I appreciate it greatly! That say-it site is the mutha-fuckin'  !

I've redone both posters.

Swiss Terror.

Changed wording and added some images. I'm mainly going to be printing this is gray-scale, so hopefully the Swiss flag won't be so in-your-face.

Don't be Afraid!

I think this one cleaned up pretty well.

Now, I know that it may not mean much to you guys, but I have never been good with computers, but the encouragement I received has motivated me to attempt to teach myself these things (heck, I didn't even know what a "hyper-link" was until today ), and I want to thank you for that. They may not be much, but they are my first creations and I am very proud right now  

In fact, this is the first thing to motivate me in a while. I couldn't sleep last night because I was thinking about this so much. And today I ditched class to come home and work on them. This is so addicting. I'm soooo going to make more.  

Thanks again!

I  think they look great! I'll definitely make use of them in my neighborhood.

Not buying it, Roger.

You appear to be speculating, and I am not doubting that you are honest, I am doubting that you are correct.

Where are these "federal funds" for Oregon?

Too many implausible explanations, not enough fact.

You can fix bad credit in seven years, ask me how.

My search engine is borked here, but when I get home I will post a link.

We have a version of Florida's "Baker Act".  So does Oregon, from what little "Bing" would deliver on a search.  

Not that I'm aware of. My ex (the heroin junkie) tried to have me committed. Luckily (for me, if not for the thousands who need to be and aren't) it's not that easy in Oregon. The Community Mental Health Program has completely inadequate funding (see OSH and Dammasch closures).

But even so, that's a whole different ball of wax; then they're not treating her as a druggie, they're treating her as a suicide attempt, and that doesn't really mesh with the original premise of the story very well.

I feel a little different about it, now that I know the kid's not dead.

Inpatient drug treatment is very, very expensive. How does Arizona pay for it?

Federal funds.

Oh, and they sic collections agents on you until the end of time.  So not only are you forever forbidden to own firearms or gain a clearance, etc, your credit is also trashed beyond any chance of ever fixing it within a human lifespan.

We fix everyone, down here.

Not buying it, Roger.

Where are these "federal funds" for Oregon?

Too many implausible explanations, not enough fact.

You can fix bad credit in seven years, ask me how.

I'M JUST SAYING THERE ARE SOME GAPING HOLES IN THIS STORY. Like the one where Arizona's ERs are somehow able to independently commit junkies to inpatient treatment at behavioral therapy facilities, and how this is paid for. Because no matter how many junkies you bill for their involuntary inpatient time, you're not going to get a high rate of recompense. And once word got out, every junkie desperate to get clean would be taking too many pills and heading to the ER.

And I still want to know what Nivek WANTED them to have done, instead of telling her to wait it out, and sending her to rehab. Tucked her into a nice cozy bed and read her a story?

And, actually, I'm a little unclear on that... I've never heard of an ER making someone go to drug treatment. Referring, yes.

Nivek, were your parents involved in that decision?

Arizona has funny laws.

For example, if EMTs feel you aren't in your right head when you don't want to go to the hospital, they'll have some cops beat on you until you shut up and get in the ambulance.

Inpatient drug treatment is very, very expensive. How does Arizona pay for it?

Is there a chapter about asking nicely for what you want, because your friend might just listen and grant it to you out of compassion?

If there isn't, maybe there should be.

Sorry, you want I should remove the pic?

TGRR,
Dense as neutronium, and almost as smart.

Oh, I didn't mean for you to do that. Just not post any more of them. I was replying  to LMNO's "tough cookies" schtick. But thank you!

Alright, so:

Update,

Job is great, doing what i love to do and making really good money doing it in beautiful places.

Housemate psycho lady texted me twice today, I've already told Suu i can't afford 'em as it's a pay as you go phone, also have told psycho housemate this before.

My minutes have now been used up since these texts were sent.
Can't put minutes on my phone til next wednesday now.

FUCK.

When i come back there we are getting the fuck out.

Can't you turn texting off?

ETA OH YOU JUST SAID THAT