EoC's World of Dispatching

[Eater of Clowns]

The maintenance crew seems to be having a crisis of insurmountable odds:

Maintenance Work Request
Requested By:  They

Date:  Today

Facility:  Jail

Location/Work Area:  earth

Problem/Work Request:  every thing





That one's hitting me a funny way ten hours into the work day.

[Richter]

 

"Insufficient equipment and physical plant to compelte request.  Please submit to facility management for review, then re-submit."

[Eater of Clowns]

4/14/11  0846 Captain ***** reports there is a rooster walking around the women's center.  K9 was notified.

4/14/11  1227 K9 Lietenant ****** reports the rooster is back and near the women's center entrance.  Sallyport was notified.  K9 is attempting to contact animal control.

4/14/11  1542 K9 Officer ***** reports animal control is on scene.

4/14/11  1547 K9 Officer ***** reports animal control has the rooster captured.  K9 and animal control are clear of that scene.

[Richter]

So...

You're saying they sucessfully removed the cock from the women's center?

[Luna]

So...

You're saying they sucessfully removed the cock from the women's center?

Richter!  Saying it so the rest of us don't have to.   

[Eater of Clowns]

It was a male chicken.  It was black.  It was actually harassing people outside the women's facility.

I was only actually there for the tail end of it all, but sweet christ that's just too good to pass up.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

And it only took . . . what, seven hours?

I bet those chicks were irritated.

[Eater of Clowns]

And it only took . . . what, seven hours?

I bet those chicks were irritated.

We're a state agency.  Frankly, I'm amazed it got done at all.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

And it only took . . . what, seven hours?

I bet those chicks were irritated.

We're a state agency.  Frankly, I'm amazed it got done at all.

Good point. :P

[Eater of Clowns]

The great minds of my department hard at work.  This was an answer key to a Corrections Ethics question during this morning's training:

A.  Applies to men only.
B.  Applies to women only.
C.  Applies to both men and women.
D.  Only B.

[Freeky]

wat

[Dysnomia]

Ambulance call:  Patient swallowed a grape whole and is complaining of feeling like it's stuck in her upper asophagus.

if that's true, how was she able to make the call?  Then again, that's a really good way to choke yourself to death. 

It was a male chicken.  It was black.  It was actually harassing people outside the women's facility.

I was only actually there for the tail end of it all, but sweet christ that's just too good to pass up.

so, a black cock was terrorizing a women's locker room.   

[Eve Hill]

Really enjoying reading this thread, EoC!

[Eater of Clowns]

Really enjoying reading this thread, EoC!

Hah, glad to hear it.  I realized shortly after making it that the really fucked up things I can't put up here for legal reasons, as they're ongoing cases and such.  But the absurd and stupid shit that happens during regular jail operations I'm totally alright with posting.

[Eve Hill]

Really enjoying reading this thread, EoC!

Hah, glad to hear it.  I realized shortly after making it that the really fucked up things I can't put up here for legal reasons, as they're ongoing cases and such.  But the absurd and stupid shit that happens during regular jail operations I'm totally alright with posting.

It's fun to read. My sister's fiance' will sometimes talk about the crazy stuff he sees when he's working, too. He had us howling one night when he talked about something that had happened during his first couple weeks on the job. He was working the night shift and responded to what he thought was a woman screaming. He had to radio back that it was just 2 cats mating behind a dumpster. Lol, he said the other guys left meow mix on his desk for a week straight. :-D