Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Or Kill Me => Topic started by: The Wizard Joseph on December 13, 2016, 04:11:54 AM

Title: Turn It Off!!
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on December 13, 2016, 04:11:54 AM
Turn It Off

Fucking stop it right now. Stop "The Feed", your precious tweetings and insta-whatevers, THAT FUCKING GLOWBOX  POCKET-MONSTER, ALL OF IT!

Just shut it down. Pull the plugs and batteries. Drop that shit in a hole and WALK AWAY!!

You can walk away can't you? Those things are just nice, super-duper modern conveniences RIGHT? They're EMPOWERING YOU. Making you a GOD, and all from your easy chair right? YOU GOT THIS!

You DO get it right? You're not just some "pleb on the street". You're putting the "king" in F U C "K I N G"  R O Y A L T Y with your techy understandings and your wiki-nets on the inter-tube and you-vids AIN'TCHA? Got no problems a battery charger can't fix. Never got lost. Always got delivery food. Never needed to look someone in THE FACE and lie. Never got sick or bled for longer than it takes to look up how to bandaids your ouchie or web an MD up. Never gonna worry about being afraid of THE DARK outside in them IRLs out there.

Not you. Never ever you. You got POWER AND NO WAITING!
You got your divine fucking LICENCE right there on your laptops and internetted goddamn toothbrush. You even get TO FUCK whenevs, whatevs, howevs... ALL THAT EVS IS YOURS! Just put a post in the Tinders or a fucklist. Easy AND convenient without ever even having to actually BE what you say,
not for too long anyway.

I'M HERE TO TELL YOU THAT YOU GOT TO GIVE IT UP! YOUR BRAIN GOT THE BEETUS!! YOUR HEART NEEDS AT LEAST 4 BARS TO FUNCTION!!!

WHO TOLD YOU THIS WAS EVER FOR YOU!? All this newfangled googles and wiki-dos and the chat-chan must have just up and manifested to service your HIGH-END HEINDER HUH? Got a powder button for that thing somewhere in your IoTs of things?

DO YA?

Got an android for that APPSWIPE!!???

Turn it all off then if it's just a thing in your hands, fit to serve.

Go ON GIVE IT UP! Put them toys away.
GO DO OTHER THINGS!! FIND THE PLUGS AND TUBES AND PULL THEM OUT UNTIL IT DIES IF YOU'RE SO DAMN STRONG THEN.
I'll wait.

..... anytime now.

Not your idea of doable huh? Crazy talk? Just not feedsable or such?
Don't need to do what I say because it's ALL GOOD?

Sure don't look too good from here, you being all tied in with nowhere to go like that.

Not my problem though.

I told you. What more do you need, a brick through the window? Maybe just a fried squirrel in the powerbox for your block?

Might just save your life.

Let me put it another way.

TURN IT OFF
OR
YOU
WILL
DIE.

Because someday you'll realize too late that in all that shit coming down your feed-tubes not one bit of it helped you live. Never was for you. Never had a moment to spare that you didn't give up to it. Never helped you remember shit, just held your notes and cloud-bits... for now.

ONE DAY..

Mark this down in INK

ONE DAY YOUR TIME, YOUR LUCK, OR YOUR MONEY WILL RUN DRY ON YOU.

And the one universal law of our reality will set in hard.
And the one thing you needed to know will come clear.
And the sign at the end of that bright light tunnel reads:

NO REFUNDS,
SCHMUCK

So turn it all off,
while you still got time.

Title: Re: Turn It Off!!
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on December 13, 2016, 05:49:08 AM
I am reasonably certain that electronic communications have improved us as human beings.

Not flawlessly and not without cost, but on the balance for the better.

And do you know what we did before the internet?

we drank crappy beer all the time.
Title: Re: Turn It Off!!
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 13, 2016, 03:20:46 PM
I dunno, I can't really get into pro-Luddism, "everyone in the world but me is a sheep" rants, and that's how this one came across to me.
Title: Re: Turn It Off!!
Post by: P3nT4gR4m on December 14, 2016, 10:55:31 AM
I been stuck in the real world for 40-odd years. Now I got reality 2.0 (this time it's virtual) to explore. Aint planning on turning that off anytime soon. I'd happily turn off the old one, tho. Fuck all interesting going on there. :lulz:
Title: Re: Turn It Off!!
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on December 14, 2016, 09:58:14 PM
This was a rant, not a statement of Cramulus.

I wanted to stay offline for three days, but here I am on day 2.

Still... you're responsible for how this thing interacts with you.

Or kill me