Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Techmology and Scientism => High Weirdness => Topic started by: Cain on October 04, 2016, 05:36:55 PM

Title: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 04, 2016, 05:36:55 PM
So, as you may have noticed, creepy clowns are, for some reason, back in the news.

http://infocult.typepad.com/ seems to be the best place currently tracking is weird phenomenon, so I wanted to bring it to your attention.  Consider this the thread for creepy clowns.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Eater of Clowns on October 04, 2016, 07:31:43 PM
heavy breathing
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 05, 2016, 12:23:00 AM
http://www.kentucky.com/news/state/article105638946.html

QuoteA man used his AR-15 gun to scare a woman wearing a white afghan Monday after mistaking her for clown, according to a citation from the Bardstown Police Department.

According to the citation, a woman was walking her dog down Burlington Court wearing a white afghan when a man yelled at her and then fired an AR-15.

The man, Adam Tingle, said his wife was outside when she thought she saw a clown, so Tingle came out and yelled at the individual, according to the citation. The woman did not move after being yelled at, so Tingle fired one shot from his AR-15 rifle in an attempt to scare her. Tingle's wife then called 911 to report the incident.

I really want to blame this story on Chuck Tingle, but it is apparently real.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on October 05, 2016, 01:55:01 AM
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on October 04, 2016, 07:31:43 PM
heavy breathing

Please stop whatever it is you're doing on the astral, thnks.

I'm making more pics so you can, like, channel that out on the appropriate frequencies until we can get you real clowns OK? I just need to get the stuff I was contacted to google by... your. . Uh, your superiors (?). Whoever it was apparently called in some favors so... here's 1. There's a couple more I found that I didn't do I'll post too, but the one with your initials is edited from the very freshest random stock I googled up just moments ago.


Um... I'm going to get some of the GRIN ideas I've been sitting on too... just please no more, uh, business in the 5th heaven and up for now, ok?
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on October 05, 2016, 01:57:11 AM
Shit I thought I cropped that... let me see if I can figure out what I did wrong here...
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Sita on October 06, 2016, 01:42:30 AM
Earlier this week we got a call from the school board to keep an eye out and that everyone was on 'alert campus'.
There's been two instances so far, one was just a general threat about high schools in the county.
The other was for a specific middle school. Turned out to be a 6th grader joking around with his friends, but since it was over social media more than his friends saw and it was taken as a serious threat and the kid was arrested.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 06, 2016, 03:33:35 PM
Quote from: Sita on October 06, 2016, 01:42:30 AM
Earlier this week we got a call from the school board to keep an eye out and that everyone was on 'alert campus'.
There's been two instances so far, one was just a general threat about high schools in the county.
The other was for a specific middle school. Turned out to be a 6th grader joking around with his friends, but since it was over social media more than his friends saw and it was taken as a serious threat and the kid was arrested.

For dressing like a clown?
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 06, 2016, 04:01:31 PM
I found an interesting article on clown panics, let me see if I can find it again...
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 06, 2016, 04:04:40 PM
Here it is! http://people.com/crime/creepy-clown-sightings-2016-whats-happening-explainer/

Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Eater of Clowns on October 06, 2016, 04:35:13 PM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 06, 2016, 04:04:40 PM
Here it is! http://people.com/crime/creepy-clown-sightings-2016-whats-happening-explainer/

Interesting!

I think I'm going to write something up later about clown brood spawning for shits and giggles.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: The Wizard Joseph on October 06, 2016, 06:08:28 PM
There's people telling me there have been sightings of roving packs in the SE Wisconsin area rolling down generally towards Iowa. Confirmed clowns apparently sighted in a parking building downtown LaCrosse recently.

Are motherfuckers unaware of our nebulous "castle" laws and nearly unrestricted concealed-carry licensing? Fuck's sake. There's folks actually reacting fearfully, others going out in clown makeup apparently aware of how dangerous real clowns can be.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Sita on October 07, 2016, 12:29:43 AM
Quote from: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 06, 2016, 03:33:35 PM
Quote from: Sita on October 06, 2016, 01:42:30 AM
Earlier this week we got a call from the school board to keep an eye out and that everyone was on 'alert campus'.
There's been two instances so far, one was just a general threat about high schools in the county.
The other was for a specific middle school. Turned out to be a 6th grader joking around with his friends, but since it was over social media more than his friends saw and it was taken as a serious threat and the kid was arrested.

For dressing like a clown?
Making a threat against the school.
The Facebook post didn't give any details about the message, just that the kid was arrested and he said he was just joking around and wasn't serious.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 08, 2016, 03:47:26 PM
Apparently, the clown panic has spread to Australia.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-10-08/creepy-clowns-arrested-in-us-as-trend-spreads-to-australia/7915284

France seems to be ahead of the curve; they had a clown panic in 2014.

http://www.france24.com/en/20141026-panic-clown-terror-spreads-southern-france
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: POFP on October 09, 2016, 06:51:54 PM
Quote from: The Wizard Joseph on October 06, 2016, 06:08:28 PM
There's people telling me there have been sightings of roving packs in the SE Wisconsin area rolling down generally towards Iowa. Confirmed clowns apparently sighted in a parking building downtown LaCrosse recently.

Are motherfuckers unaware of our nebulous "castle" laws and nearly unrestricted concealed-carry licensing? Fuck's sake. There's folks actually reacting fearfully, others going out in clown makeup apparently aware of how dangerous real clowns can be.

Yeah, Ohio has Castle Doctrine as well. Terribly dangerous place to be a clown right now. Not that clown costumes should warrant the use of gun violence (Some random asshole dresses up as a clown and kills someone while the clown sightings ramp up, so now every clown is treated as a threat) or anything. Just, poor thought process considering the mental state of the American People at this point.

The whole thing is beyond fucking stupid. Irrationally intense fear of clowns (To the point that you'd actually attack someone who is dressed up as a clown) is fucking stupid. It's an embarrassment to the Human Race. Aliens will never give two shits about communicating with us because of self-destructive shit like this.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Junkenstein on October 09, 2016, 07:55:45 PM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 08, 2016, 03:47:26 PM
Apparently, the clown panic has spread to Australia.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-10-08/creepy-clowns-arrested-in-us-as-trend-spreads-to-australia/7915284

France seems to be ahead of the curve; they had a clown panic in 2014.

http://www.france24.com/en/20141026-panic-clown-terror-spreads-southern-france

BBC is reporting on UK occurances too.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 09, 2016, 08:42:10 PM
I Tucson, some college-aged girl has started "clown lives matter" with a totally straight, painted face.

I am so deeply ashamed for my city now.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 10, 2016, 09:35:56 PM
Wasn't there also a "clown walk" planned for a night next week or something?

Because a bunch of clowns marching down a street late at night won't be terrifying at all.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: hooplala on October 12, 2016, 06:12:43 AM
When there's no more room in satire hell, the clowns shall walk the earth.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 12, 2016, 09:59:51 AM
Clown panic has definitively spread to the UK

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-37605841

QuotePolice across England have been called to dozens of incidents in which pranksters dress as "creepy clowns" to deliberately scare people.

The culprits are said to be following a trend that started in the US.

A 30-year-old man was arrested and cautioned in Norwich after someone dressed as a clown jumped out from behind a tree and "terrified" a woman in a public park.

On Sunday Thames Valley Police said it was called to 14 incidents in 24 hours.

I've heard of several schools up north being put in lockdown because a clown was seen nearby as well.

So far, as an educator, I've had no official guidance on what to do re: clowns, which is probably just as well, given the literature on radicalisation.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Junkenstein on October 12, 2016, 01:22:04 PM
I would say that you need to ask. Many questions. And demand official responses.

Either that or buy a mask and join in.

Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 12, 2016, 04:07:39 PM
Oh, I told them I'm no longer attending meetings on that topic ever again.

I'm also not working Halloween at all, so....all my fucks have fled.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 12, 2016, 04:18:59 PM
I can't wait until some municipalities outlaw clown costumes.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 12, 2016, 04:19:43 PM
When clowns are outlawed, only outlaws will be clowns.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 12, 2016, 04:21:43 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 12, 2016, 04:19:43 PM
When clowns are outlawed, only outlaws will be clowns.

I sense a dystopian future coming on.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Junkenstein on October 12, 2016, 04:33:24 PM
I'm just waiting for a mime to be attacked by idiots thinking it's a clown.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 13, 2016, 01:34:10 AM
If you see a clown with a log, please call the police:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-37634853

QuoteA teenage boy needed stitches after he was injured in a clown craze attack near Rotherham.

The boy was treated in hospital for a cut to his head after the clown threw a log at him on Lordens Hill, Dinnington, on Tuesday night.

South Yorkshire Police said it had received 61 reports of incidents involving clowns since 21 September.

Officers are also investigating two reports of clowns armed with knives.

In an interview, Owen Russell, 17, said he was walking home with friends, and bumped into the clown after taking a shortcut down an alleyway.

He said the clown started making sinister noises, before throwing a log at him, leaving him needing six stitches to a cut on his head.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Junkenstein on October 13, 2016, 03:16:32 AM
"Sinister noises".


What the fuck is this? Was he humming a tune from a horror film?
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: The Good Reverend Roger on October 13, 2016, 03:28:00 AM
Quote from: Junkenstein on October 13, 2016, 03:16:32 AM
"Sinister noises".


What the fuck is this? Was he humming a tune from a horror film?

This is mass-hysteria.

Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 13, 2016, 02:17:48 PM
Who loiters in an alleyway with a log, while dressed as a clown, in a Sheffield suburb?

I wouldn't be surprised to find this was fake.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 13, 2016, 05:34:11 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 13, 2016, 02:17:48 PM
Who loiters in an alleyway with a log, while dressed as a clown, in a Sheffield suburb?

I wouldn't be surprised to find this was fake.

From what I've read, a huge proportion of the "clown attacks" are either unverifiable or have been proven fake. This is going to be awesome in the history books.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Sita on October 14, 2016, 12:46:56 PM
Well, two kids at my son's school just got arrested with this clown nonsense.

They thought it would be a great joke to write notes from 'Sparkles the Clown' and leave them around campus for teachers and students to find.
The notes had such cheerful messages as 'I'm gunna kill u all' and 'All teachers gunna die'

I just don't understand it. 14 is such a young age to have a felony record, and all because they thought it would be funny.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 14, 2016, 05:51:32 PM
And now it's spread to Sweden:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-37657072

QuoteA man in a clown mask has stabbed a teenager in western Sweden, police have said.

The youth was left with minor injuries following the attack, which happened when he went outside for a cigarette in Varberg, south of Gothenburg.

It came the day after two people in clown costumes reportedly threatened to kill a woman in central Sweden.

The reports are the latest in a wave of "creepy clown" sightings in Europe and the US.

The craze involves adults in frightening outfits scaring passers-by.

Quote"We do not know what prompted this. It was not a robbery, and I do not know if they had fought before," spokesman Ulla Brehm told Gotesburgposten.

"It's hard to say if this is something that has to do with the trend that has come from the US, but there was a clown mask on the site."

However, Swedish Interior Minister Anders Ygeman has called for calm as more and more sightings of scary clowns are made across Sweden.

"We don't want to see a situation where a person gets into real trouble because someone, perhaps half joking, puts on a clown mask," Mr Ygeman told the TT news agency.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: minuspace on October 15, 2016, 03:32:47 AM


(http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj47/davecschick/clown.jpg) (http://s269.photobucket.com/user/davecschick/media/clown.jpg.html)
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 15, 2016, 05:58:17 AM
I'd like to think that the world's clown panic is just the result of unconscious fear of Donald Trump.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Cain on October 15, 2016, 04:15:42 PM
There is apparently a remake of It coming out next year.  I call viral marketing scheme hijacked by idiots and occasional criminals
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 15, 2016, 05:57:43 PM
Quote from: Cain on October 15, 2016, 04:15:42 PM
There is apparently a remake of It coming out next year.  I call viral marketing scheme hijacked by idiots and occasional criminals

That has been bandied about quite a bit as possibly the trigger that set off this particular clown panic.
Title: Re: The Great Clown Panic of 2016
Post by: minuspace on October 15, 2016, 07:16:30 PM
Darn it, if it is a campaign, the way to hijack would be to go around performing acts of kindness.  The effect would be such as to require progressively less clown costume over time.