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There are inherent evolutionary benefits to making friends with the role of the catechist over crafting it into an enemy.

Seek out and eradicate weakness and defect by revealing the foundation of any belief system keeping firmly in mind that every schism is the will of the operator.

You are assisting and respecting the will of the operator in assisting in the breakdown of systems.

Addition of simplicity and subtraction of willful ignorance, personal insecurities and other malfunctions and inhibitors will assist in achieving optimal system performance.

Be aware that there is no such thing as a minimal component system as function is to be considered an amenity over equilibrium.

AKK

A little known fact is that the collapse of the state vector (or wave function) in any given circumstance occurs in the consciousness of the perciever (see Multiverse, Consistant/Multiple histories, Many Worlds, and Schr??dinger's cat, among other cosmology). 

As such it can be inferred that although an instance may occur that it will be recieved differently by every consciousness including de-coherance.

Speaking strictly from a rational veiwpoint, the universe cannot exist strictly in a state of equilibrium or antithesis as both terms are mutually exclusive of subjectivity (hence the forces of chaos).

Reason then allows us to deduce that although we, as human beings, do not have the power to control the origin of information, we do indeed have 100% responsibility to how we percieve/measure and react to it.

Cabbages are often noted for measuring their own subjective human conditions in terms of suffering.  How will you measure yours?

So one of my more promiscuous female friends got herself knocked up and the father's last name is "Stomp".

She asked me for name ideas that might detract from how bad the last name sounds.

I replied with the obvious "You should call it 'Baby Stomp'." and proceeded to fall out of my chair and point and laugh at her.

Anyhow, anyone got any ideas, funny or usefull?  I'll pitch them to her =D

AKK

Alright, market research results are in for the day and Ambassador Kaos has decided to school you mother fuckers on some core values as it seems many of you either 1, got dropped on the head too many times as an adult or 2, had parents that didn't properly instill a sense of individuality in you and you've since been living your life as a sad excuse for a failed abortion.

Well, no more excuses. Sit down and shut up you moron.

Leadership acronym.  LDRSHIP.


Loyalty    Bear true faith and allegiance to the U.S. Constitution, the Army, your unit, and other soldiers.yourself and those that provide benevolence to you.

Duty    Fulfill your obligations.

Respect    Treat people as they should be treated.  Respect everyone, be they subordinate, enemy or stupid people in large numbers.

Selfless-Service    Put the welfare of the nation, the Army, and your subordinates before your own.

Honor    Live up to all the Army values.  Go research code of the Samarai, that's where stole this shit from anyhow.

Integrity    Do what,Äôs right legally and morally... and do as thou wilt shall be the whole of the law, but don't expect people to praise your integrity you frequently go on changing the rules to suit your whims.

Personal Courage    Face fear, danger, or adversity (Physical or Moral).




...that ain't no white Trash talkin redneck bear fucking hippie bullshit neither.  That's straight from Ft. Benning GA, home of the US infantry, largest corperation in America. 

Say what you will about American administration or having a military to begin with, but realize that your peace protests won't do much VS a bullet fired from any man who leads himself responsibly. 

Further, a killer with respect and values will always be superior to one who acts out in anger.

Learn this shit and free yourself from any idea of instITution; in this manner when your safety nets fall apart you'll still be able to land on your feet.

MENTAL ENDURANCE PEOPLE, MENTAL ENDURANCE...

Cut yourself off from the reality feeding tube you have hooked yourself to.  Isolate your thoughts and know that they are not your own but subjective conclusions drawn from your environmental conditions.  It is not enough to draw a line in the sand and say ,Äúthis is us and that is them.,Äù for they think the same thing.

Follow no revolution but be one unto yourself.  Realize that there is no ,Äúthem,Äù or ,Äúyou,Äù until you define it.  Become an agent of change within yourself by frequently undermining your own definitions and abandoning the reason you cling so tightly to.

I saw a man walking down the street today, expensive business suit, newest cell phone on the market, bulging wallet and the posture, vocabulary and demeanor of a hominid.  He was talking on the phone with his wife or girlfriend.  I wondered to myself: ,ÄúWhy is it that this man has the traditionally desirable qualities of an American family business man when his apparent intellect is that of roughly a piece of fruit? Further, who designated that these qualities were fashionable to begin with?,Äù

Having asked this same question many times in my life the answer came back to me quickly.  I have no idea why this man is where he is today, and the truth of the matter is that neither does he, not because he is stupid but because it is impossible to calculate the infinite amount of variable circumstances that have come to pass.  He may have advice, but this is just as subjective as anything and is in no way guaranteed to ring true for anyone but him, and even then, only at this exact moment as the perpetual motion of existence tirelessly realligns these factors.

There are truly too many factors to account for in existence and even the fastest computer (let alone a human mind) cannot calculate them all.  In releasing control over ones existence one finds they gain a measure of control over, though not likely in the fashion they would have predicted or desired. 

This control instead takes the form of comfort in the knowledge that the sum of all infinite digits (and possibilities) is zero and that the universe will always maintain this equation, freeing the user from their self induced responsibility of maintaining their ,Äúimagined perfect life,Äù.

This step is akin to realizing that changing the angle of the mirror won,Äôt make you look different and will at best reflect the illusion of a more rewarding life or specific aspect of self.  The obvious solution here is to leave the mirror alone and independently go to work on improving the image caster.  Start with this and the rest will make itself clear.

For instructions on how to complete this task refer to the top read and repeat as necessary.  A farce is a farce and saying that it isn't doesn't change the fact.  Additionally, there is no guarantee that it will all be OK in the end, and chances are that if it hasn't been so far that the trend may well continue.

Preface: This isn't targetted it's just a bullet rant.

1) Don't believe in your own bullshit.

2) Don't believe in any bullshit you don't site as necessary for your continued existence.  

3)Undermine the bullshit you site as necessary whenever possible.

4) Don't eat the bullshit that is presented to you without first killing it and performing a detailed autopsy and disection, and then...

5) Believe in your own bullshit.

In this rant the term bullshit can be interpreted to be many things but I found "perceptions" and "grids" were the first ones that came to me.

Other substitutions you used and liked?

[Don,Äôt Ever let them see you cheat.]

This is a quick essay I whipped up on request to help explain how internal subversion works.  It's pretty heady and might not be an easy read if you're on crack.  I used some common imagery and local jargon for flavor and identifiability.  Enjoy!

Don,Äôt Ever let them see you cheat.

,ÄúAre you unhappy?  Well you,Äôre never going to get anywhere sulking. 

Quick, rise and fight!  Enact the change to better yourself!  Enact the change to better society!

You have the power!

Down with the system!  Destroy the machine! Forget everything you think you know!,Äù

( ... all the while listening to my voice herding you around like cattle...)

And so another paradigm system is established...

There is a reason this is called an incite to revolution as it will come back on itself.  The rise of revolt requires that a new system be built.  Those who revolutionized in their youth will grow old and stagnate and the youth again shall rise up under another banner of revolution in the great machine.

You cannot kill the machine, it was never alive.  You can eliminate the machine for it always was and always will be. 

You cannot break the machine, for even if you did, the machine would still run on.  You can let the machine run on, for it will break itself.

The machine is all of existence.  It feeds on itself as a perpetual motion parasite. 
This rule is never broken, for even when the universe reaches equilibrium, life shall again issue forth from the collapse of the void.

What is one to do but accept responsibility for ones existence and learn to think independently from the source, from the feeding tube of the machine/existence.  Some might think of this as death, others might call it confusion or freedom, and others still may call it ,Äúdumping the ram,Äù.  It can take many forms, but the theme is the same; clearing out as much noise as possible for equalization.

Living in balance allows one to achieve optimum performance in their tasks.  Not living in balance allows one to become caught up in the moment and eventually taken by the moment.  Though this can take a pleasant form, as often as not it can be negative, and when one has let go of the steering wheel of their psyche, there is no telling what kind of ride they are in for or where they might land themselves.

To best achieve equalization in life it is best to develop a grande sense of irony.  Learning to understand exact polar opposites in any given situation is key to a grand sense of irony.  Once this is established one is free to make a counter action whenever they notice their life moving out of their control.

Some may find it is enjoyable to let go of the wheel for a time, but in all likely hood it is because they have been holding on to it for too long, so this too, is a counteraction in accordance with the understanding of a grand sense of irony.

Early on one will find that external subversion is an excellent means of rearranging one,Äôs life in reaction to change.  Doing solely this, however, will eventually imbalance.  It takes a lot of energy to change one,Äôs environment, so much so a person may lose track of their own mind.

The cure, or better yet, preemptive treatment for this kind of breakdown is internal subversion.  Should one be clinging tightly to an ideal so much so that they quest to make it a reality and find that they have had an insufficient impact it is best to temporarily internally subvert that idea.  To align it with accordance with reality versus personal desire.

As one becomes more advanced at this concept they find it comes with ease and that their life becomes more fluid, yet the internally subversive mind knows that this too, is an illusion that requires balance.  One may even resort to causing strife where there was none to achieve a change they wish to see in the paradigm; start a revolution.

Again, the internally subversive mind knows that this too is all just a turn of the cog.

In time one will learn to accept and reject the paradigm simultaneously and it is then that their own subversion will subvert itself and another revolution in the machine shall begin.

Always change, always turn a cog, and remember it,Äôs not a trick if you do it twice.

I was picking thorugh the wiki and I noticed a section "meme bombs"

which reminded me of a page I have although mine isn't quite as all inclusive as the wiki page as I did what I could to eliminate things that were humorous or not encompassing of the frame work of AKK.

anyhow here is the link: http://www.aklokwerkkaos.com/hivemind.html

I have a plans in motion which are near done but I'm at the last phase of transforming the page, however, my graphics and html skills are teh sukz0rz, so if you got those skills and programs and are willing to spare maybe a half an hour some time I could really use a quick hand.  Please let me know in a pm and I'll discuss the details then.

Otherwise enjoy the stuff...  keep in mind this info is from all over, some of it is original, most of it is not.

And for you people who are curious as to which way I swing on things, this is a good read.

Feel free to chat it up or comment but be on alert that I've been promised my threads will be spammed.  Enjoy!

So anyhow, here is a rough draft for the first article I have for intention of inclusion in the BIP.  Treat this forum as a think tank.  Pull this apart, see where it goes and hopefully by the time we are done we'll all be covered in guts and it won't even resemble it's original incarnation.  Please make attempts to be constructive.

Surving the Black Iron Prison: A Field User's Guide

I know what you're thinking.
"Damn man, gee..  Black Iron Prison?  That sounds like it really sucks."
Yeah, well, sometimes. 
And now you're wondering exactly what kinda bastards would want to tell you this sorta thing.  Wouldn't it better if they had just kept their mouths shut and let you die a slow happy death of mental, physical and spiritual stagnation? 
Those Jerks...  always ruining a good time with their psycho babble...

The bad news is, it's too late to go back now, so "ha ha",  the joke's on you. *snicker*
The good news is, now that you are armed with this new intellectual arsenal and you can use it responsibly to improve your life's  conditions and eventually help improve the conditions of others.  Not in the sense that you need to buy a new guitar and a bigger car, but in that you can now pull the plug on stream of perscribed nonsense you've become so numb too that you forgot it was even an influence on your life.   Rather,  instead you can find and select some new perspectives and methods of meaning and living and take on a personalized quest of constant improvement.

As you start on down this new road, you're likely to find it's a lot of work to constantly discover new ideas and methods of viewing/doing things.  If you find yourself bogged down by this procedure of reframing and reimprinting try some the following ideas:

1.  Abandon reason and cheapen the experience by telling yourself it will all be worth it in the end.  In all likelyhood it won't be, but dangling an illusory carrot in front of you can do wonders to get you through difficult times.  Who wouldn't want to fool themselves?

2.  Find out what works and stick to it until it doesn't work any more.  As you go through life you will find that the paradigm in which you sit is likely to change frequently, without your approval, and without notice.  What worked yesterday, may or may not work today or tomarrow.  Learning to yield and adapt while remaining true to form is like, Zen, or something smart like that.

3.  It's Better to be happy.  So resist the resist the urge to be a douche bag and make other people uncomfortbale as it will likely result in your uncomfortability as well.  Also, laugh often.  Especially when it might be considered innappropriate to do so.

4.  Live in balance.  This doesn't mean don't overdo or avoid certain things, rather, compensate appropriately.  Barring that, see step one and find a way to fool yourself in accordance with steps 2 and 3.

5.  Buy all my records.  This will not solve your problems, but it will help contribute to my fund for another sollid gold Hum Vee, and that is what really matters in life.

6. If you find yourself debating whether or not reality exists, whether or not you are really a brain in a jar, and whether or not a barstool is really there, punch yourself in the genitals.  This will not solve the argument but will help cure your pretentiousness by serving to remind you that whatever the truth is, that you don't know it, and that you are still subject to proposed physical laws.

Keep these things in mind, or don't.

This too shall pass,
Ambassador KLOK KAOS




...Once this gets played around with my next idea is to pull some of the quotes from the wiki and format it into an article.

Welcome to the 50 Post Roast of Ambassador KLOK KAOS!

Be Brutal.  Sink your teeth in.  Reduce what is left to ash.

I promise to read the posts, click all the links (please don't link me to viruses and other dangers), be a good sport, and keep my mouth shut the whole time.  I'll leave this open for a week and make and then make a closing statement at which point the mods can kill the thread at any time.  Be creative, go nuts, be mean if you feel you really have to. 
Put your money where your mouth is, earn/prove/reinforce your reputation and enjoy the party!

Ambassador KLOK KAOS

FLAME ON!

So over all I feel that the premise of the book failed for me.  being that in some forum I read that it was designed to revisit the PD and bring it in to a more up to date format.  Sure there are more pop culture references (like cell phonesz nad web pages) that are "more modern" but the term "bowling alley" is still understood and until what it is is lost in time I think the term works just fine as opposed to saying that Eris was discovered at an internet cafe or whatever futuristic hop might exist when the term bowling alley is no longer understood.  Even then, we can still figure out the shit in shakespear with a few cliff notes so I say that the idea of updating it is shinanigans.  It's not necessary, and even if it was, the message of the story of the discover of eris is the same whether it be a bowling alley, disney land, an internet cafe or your mothers basement.
On a different note however, this book does tread into some new territory and makes it valuable unto itself.  I think the premise should be changed rather to using the PD as a luanching pad for this book, not to make it the PD rediscovered and repackaged with one of 6 coloful prizes inside. (collect them all!)
I also read in some other forum commentary that this thing was really a bummer.  Maybe in some spots, but I think that what the real problem is is not that it is at all depressing, because if you read the PD it too certainly covers depressing crap, is that it doesn't engage/solicit a thought response as much as it accuses(elliciting a negative response in the reader), which of course was the genious of the PD.  I think it's a well defined fact that everyone believes they are superior in some way especially if they are one of the sheep you are trying to reach via this pamphlet. It's bred into their thinking to make them think they are special so that they don't question authority and complacently accept the fates they are handed and instead indulge in what is deemed to be fit for them.  This allows them to build their own BIP by believing that their is vastly superior and also disarm the intellectual bomb you hand them with the BIP as inferior as they have already convinced themsleves that they are happy in their own BIP and you are now a jerk (in their mind) for disrupting that.  I think a good chunk should be rewritten to point at these things and let the reader discover it for themselves, thinking now that they are instead the genious and not you for writing it to begin with.  They don't care about you, they care about how "teh awesome" they are and they need you to reinforce that until they feel comfortable letting you infect their head, and they, the audience is who you are writing this for no matter how much one tries to delude themself into thinking they are making art for art's sake or just for personal reasons...  Quite simply, who wants to stick around for something that's not a good time?

That brings me to another point, which actually contradicts that last point.  People enjoy suffering.  They revel in it and as far as history has ever recorded human existence is measured in misery, not dollars and cents.  They feel it makes them special and thus justifies that they know how best to create their own BIP because *you* couldn't possibly undertand (and the truth is you can't).  Little do most people know that they are indeed not independant and really have no real measure of control over anything (touching on the whole fish tank segment in BIP, the fish doesn't know it's wet, etc.) and people who do think that they are independant are in the very least slaves of some defunct economist.  The simple truth is you will not eat unless you do someone else's bidding, it's just a measure of how much shit your willing to swallow.  Even assuming the best of circumstances, that you inherrit tax free airable land and are trained to reap what you sew early on in life, if you do this you will have time for little else (the more you struggle to survive the tighter the girdle gets) and eventually some jerk will come along and kill you and take your shit becuase you have it and he doesn't, which is how we end up with surplus anyhow, by fucking other people out of what they have rightfully worked for.  If, on the other hand, you suck the corperate cock and pay your taxes you get a measure of protection afforded to you because, as a tool, you pay these people in dues of your own personal dignity and strongarm money(commonly known as taxes).  In return they allow you certain freedoms, in this instance the ability to write a book that slams them (the BIP).
The thing is why be so angry about it?  You are still choosing to do these things.  You choose to reject or embrace the scenario for your own ends anyhow.  The only way things might be different is if the world took to our personal ideals as a paradigm , in which case your ideals would be impressed on someone else who didn't want them and they in turn would right the BIP instead of you.  reality exists as it must and under the best possible circumastances, and if you  don't think so, keep in mind that a positive attitude will solve many of your problems, and the ones it doesn't solve will be made up for in the joy how many you people you piss off with a big ignorant shit eating grin on your face. People are a product of their environment as well as being masters of their fates.  It that dynamism that keeps life interesting.  That is why any of us are still alive, because we want to see what happens next ... to see just how fucked up this life shit can get, like a kid jumping in the seat of the scariest rollercoaster, and much like the kid, the memory and excitement will fade in time, like the wonderfull cup of coffee you had 2 monday mornings ago.  It just doesn't seem relavent to think about it once you've enjoyed it now does it?  Gotta love human nature and it's absurdity.
This leads me into a further ramble whch may just be the point of all this other rambling, we'll find out...
I tend to think that life doesn't suck so bad.  Sure it bites, but it has to.  A certain ammount of grief is necessary in life.  Without it there would be no basis for comparrison and you wouldn't even know if you were having fun (...and maybe you don't and suffer(?) from malaise).  The duality of existence is much what makes it exciting and fun.  I have a private theory that states you signed up for this life and you are getting absolutely everything you asked for and wanted in the deal, including depression, tragedy, pain and suffering. 
"BUT THAT IS COLD! Do you mean to tell me that some 14 year old girl really wanted to get raped and that the fetus really wanted to die at birth and kill it's own mother in the process!"
Yeah, actually.  And here's why.  When you die, no matter what happens afterword you won't care about what happened in life.  It will cease to matter just like that rollercoaster from when you were 8, as matter of fact, now that you're in your mid fifties that rollercoaster idea isn't sounding so hot and exciting anymore... maybe I'll just pass this round out...
being violently murdered, abused or what not will not matter in the grand scheme of things no matter what happens when you die, and you won't care.  If you are reincarnated, you won't remember, if you are void and cease to exist, it won't matter and if you go to some heaven or hell after life you are likely to be preoccupied with whatever you are doing (like you are now) and whatver happened in life, still, won't matter, you still won't care.  Maybe in some brief flash of nostalgic memeory, like that nice cup of coffee from 2 mondays ago, but you won't really care.  In this respect, mankind will approach beginning solving all his problems when he ceaes to take life so seriously.  I restated that from the PD beause I also believe that the very nature of existence makes it so that problems are necessary as part of the experience and there is no real way to solve them, as is illustrated by the bit about eris on the radio.

I'll end with an emphasis on my point that is drawn from Hitch hiker's Guide though loosely translated here...

the richest men in all the universe commissioned to have their own custom built paradise planets built to specification for maximum enjoyment.  At the end of the day these men found that they were still depressed no matter how many virgins  fed them hand peeled grapes a day, usually over something as trivial as the sky being the wrong shade of pink as the sun set after an otherwise perfect day of relaxing.
What can be learned here?  Mankind has no friggen clue what it wants.  That is part of the game, people are fickle and dumb, including you and I.  It's also what keeps us alive (steven hawkings: "it is not clear that intelligence is connected with long term survivability.")... the need to seek out new shit.  If you want people to really be influenced by the BIP, appeal to that.  My grandfather, the lord of all quotes, often plaugerized an old saying "you can catch more flies with honey than vinegar, but you can catch 10 times as many than both combined with a big steaming pile of horse shit."
Because Fuck them, and that's why.
Ambassador KLOK KAOS

PS I noticed a bit about people being randomly quoted for insertion in some rant based section of the forum on BIP for possible.  I don' have any qualms with this but if anything I have to say is to go into print I do want to have it run by me first so I can see it in context because I am egotistical.

PSS I followed an old link to BIP and the pages weren't in order (maybe they weren't supposed to be?) so if my impression is coming from an outdated verrsion, please flame me incessently for my ignorance and send me a link to the new one which is actually meatspinners in disguise.  I would love that.  It would be educational.  Do it for the children.