Very Short Stories (3 sentences)

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Deep sentence one.  Deep sentence two.

I am an artiste.

FREAD ORVER.  FREEKY WINS.

[Don Coyote]

                         .                                    .

                        .

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

My penis! Oh god, my penis! That's not what the cheese grater is for.

[Suu]

"There are things in life I just don't understand." She stated, kicking the gravel in the road she was standing on. "One of them being buggery."

[LMNO]

Grammatically speaking, you have one more sentence available.  "When quoting someone and continuing on, you only need a comma," he said.  She then proceeded to kick him square in the nuts.

[Freeky]

 

[Luna]

Grammatically speaking, you have one more sentence available.  "When quoting someone and continuing on, you only need a comma," he said.  She then proceeded to kick him square in the nuts.

[Suu]

"My hatred of the English language is why I decided to become a history major," She replied, "That makes an immense amount of sense with the amount of writing I have to do, anyway."

"Well, I believe in dialog, the rules change anyway," He shrugged. "It's not like you're writing prose."

"So is this still three sentences?" She asked, "Wait, I don't give a fuck; I have a paper to write."

[tyrannosaurus vex]

Last night I had a weird dream, and I'm glad it's over. I have the most exciting presentation to show the board today! Thank God I took the blue pill!

[Cramulus]

There was an anxious eternity between turning the key and the ignition roaring to life.

As the car lurched forward, the piles of boxes fell over one another - it was chaos in here.

I saw him in the rear view mirror, but I couldn't hear him.

[Gordon C]

"How do you get the window to close?," the fair complected co-ed asked. "Hold down control-alt-delete." Robert knew he was going to score big tonight.

[ñͤͣ̄ͦ̌̑͗͊͛͂͗ ̸̨̨̣̺̼̣̜͙͈͕̮̊̈́̈͂͛̽͊ͭ̓͆ͅé ̰̓̓́ͯ́́͞]

The politician knew it was bad when he felt not only the urge to move his bowels, but that something seemed to be moving inside his large intestines.

"Jesus fuck," he thought to himself while pressing on the left side of his abdomen with his fingertips, "that fucking dominatrix probably lost a vibrator up there."

"He's running to the bathroom, sir," Agent Kovalev reported, "retract to the small intestines?"

[LMNO]

He lay in bed, pillows wedged under his back  in order to keep him on his right side.  Sightless eyes were pointed out the window, at the sailboats anchored in the harbor in the summer's afternoon sun.  There was a weighted silence as he let out a gasping breath, never to inhale again.

[Doktor Howl]

The archangel staggered down Congress street, a mass of bruises and lacerations.

Tell us how to act?  The fuck you will.

[Prelate Diogenes Shandor]

Christ has died.
Christ is risen.
Christ hungers for brains.