My Life Story: an Introduction. (TL;DR)

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Besides, trying to dream up an entirely new system is basically just fappery unless you're rich and powerful.

I know, I kn--wait, it's still just fappery when you're rich and powerful. Look at the joke that is the "third party" in American politics. Even when they manage to wrangle in a juggernaut's support, they get laughed off the stage. And anyway, this is one place where reason will not sway my tenacity. YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!

The Koch Brothers and ALEC beg to differ.  Although it turns out that they couldn't buy a presidential election, it also turns out that it didn't matter.  They own damn near every state congress, and ain't we got fun?

There will never be a third party of any significance.  Duverger's Law takes no prisoners.

The most you can accomplish is tiny nudges to the existing system, which is more effective than it looks.

Tiny nudges against the supermassive black hole that is TV and radio. I know I'm just being a cynical asshole, but let me know how that goes. 

It goes quite nicely, thanks.  You may have noticed that despite the assbaggery I mentioned above, the country's Overton Window is moving left, not right.  It's got a long way to go until we're anything resembling centrist, but it's making progress.

I don't claim any direct credit for that for myself or for Discordianism, but rather for everyone who agitates and gets all pissy and loud...Of which we are a very tiny part.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hey there, new guy.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Hi new guy. Cool story.

Where does the "clinically insane" part start. Because that's one of those trigger phrases that will get you kicked in the face by those of us who actually HAVE had that experience.

I saw that bit and pretty much stopped reading.  Then I said "meh", and read the rest of it.  Fairly typical American experience.  Not sure about the morally ambiguous part.  That's never good.

As for moral ambiguity, I don't take a strong stance on anything unless I feel I have a strong ground to stand on. And, as they say, the more you know, the more you find you don't know. I'd rather remain neutral than fight for the wrong side. Anyway moral stances are inconsequential while I have zero influence on society. Hopefully that will change but for now I'm content to keep gathering information.

The bolded bit up there puts you way ahead of just about everyone else in the country. Hang on to it.

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

Hey new guy. Do better than the last two new guys, kay?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I think I like this new guy.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

Hi new guy. Cool story.

Where does the "clinically insane" part start. Because that's one of those trigger phrases that will get you kicked in the face by those of us who actually HAVE had that experience.

I saw that bit and pretty much stopped reading.  Then I said "meh", and read the rest of it.  Fairly typical American experience.  Not sure about the morally ambiguous part.  That's never good.

As for moral ambiguity, I don't take a strong stance on anything unless I feel I have a strong ground to stand on. And, as they say, the more you know, the more you find you don't know. I'd rather remain neutral than fight for the wrong side. Anyway moral stances are inconsequential while I have zero influence on society. Hopefully that will change but for now I'm content to keep gathering information.

The bolded bit up there puts you way ahead of just about everyone else in the country. Hang on to it.

Do not listen to Nigel.  She is wrong, not with respect to knowledge, but rather with respect to morals, ethics, or anything resembling basic humanity.  She strangled Oakland¹.  She will give you bad advice, and then she will laugh callously as you are led away in shackles.  She is diabolical, and yet most people believe her to be merely opinionated.  Run while you still have legs.



¹ This is not an obscure sports reference.  She choked every one of those bastards.

[Shtik]

Hey there, new guy.

Hi! Nice'ter meetcha!

The bolded bit up there puts you way ahead of just about everyone else in the country. Hang on to it.

Don't stroke my ego, or it'll get stiff and start knocking things over. Nobody wants that.

Hey new guy. Do better than the last two new guys, kay?

Will keep in mind, but considering that Roger hasn't yet managed to goad me into a half-assed suicide threat, I think I'll be okay.

Do not listen to Nigel.... She strangled Oakland.

As a punk rock fan, I take personal offense to that, and will disagree with her at every possible moment.

[P3nT4gR4m]

Besides, trying to dream up an entirely new system is basically just fappery unless you're rich and powerful.

I know, I kn--wait, it's still just fappery when you're rich and powerful. Look at the joke that is the "third party" in American politics. Even when they manage to wrangle in a juggernaut's support, they get laughed off the stage. And anyway, this is one place where reason will not sway my tenacity. YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!

The most you can accomplish is tiny nudges to the existing system, which is more effective than it looks.

Tiny nudges against the supermassive black hole that is TV and radio. I know I'm just being a cynical asshole, but let me know how that goes. 

Here's how I do the existence thing. I forget about the big picture, it's too ugly and there aint enough paint to change it. Does the shit that's wrong affect me or my "tribe" directly? If not then it's not an immediate concern. Not if there are fucked up things directly affecting me. Until all of those are solved, avoided or circumvented then the big picture can damn well take care of itself. So I don't worry about the effect that the state of teevee and propaganda and all of that other bullshit is having on everyone else. It's not affecting me, I've been too damn cynical, ever since my primary 4 teacher wrote that on my report card, to buy into party line jingoism and messages from our sponsors. Ergo - it's not a problem.

In prioritising solving most of my own immediate concerns I've found that the way I now view the big picture is nowhere near as "doom and gloom" as it was when I was going through hell and trying to imagine what could be done to "save" everyone. Let them solve their own fucking problems. Maybe that's the whole purpose of this game? In the absence of any proven higher moral authority then I'm more than happy to delegate the choosing of my purpose in life to myself and would advise anyone else to do the same. My purpose is to have a bunch of fun and not be too much of a cunt to everyone. Helping people in some kind of need is also something I do occasionally because it feels nice but it's not my Raison d'etre. I'd much rather be having fun while the rest of the world burns in misery.

And remember - if you're not part of the problem, you're not part of the problem.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

As a punk rock fan, I take personal offense to that, and will disagree with her at every possible moment.

If anyone should see me making it on the lost highway
Breaking all the laws of the land
Well don't you try to stop me
I'm going Nigel's way
And that's the way I'm sure she had it planned
'Cos she's my rock n roll Madonna
She's always been a lady of the road
Well everybody wants her
That's why most hate her
Because the hard way is the only way she knows
Well if she would only slow down for a short time
I'd maybe understand her just before she leaves
But she's got some fascination for that two wheel contraption
And I swear it's going to be the death of me
And I get a little bit low
And I get a little bit lower...
...'Cos she's my rock n roll Madonna
And I'm stuck here with no Ducati<sup>1





1</sup> Long story concerning Elvis Presley, a coyote, and the death of a beautiful motorcycle

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

KINGS

OF THE HIGHWAY

WE WILL BE.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

KINGS

OF THE HIGHWAY

WE WILL BE.

And if you see us coming, Bubba, you better run.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm telling ya, Shtik, there was this one time we were WAY DOWN DEEP, trying to avoid Nazi Hell Creature depth charges, and I kept telling Nigel, "We're running out of air", and she just kept giggling and poking LMNO - who was DRIVING - right in the back of the neck with a spork.  I finally said fuck it, and told Hirley0 "BLOW THE BALLAST TANKS", but he just said "No."

So I did, because the little candle we had lit was going out on account of the bad air.  So, anyways, we breach the surface next to highway I-10, on the shoulder, and the damn drill bit spins out.  Curly was kinda new, and I couldn't stop him before he opened the hatch.  The overpressure blew him right out of the conning tower like a cork.  What could we do?  The sand critters had him the moment he landed, and they started tossing him around, like a cat will with a mouse. 

He didn't even scream, he just shouted "It's just the pills, Roger!  It's always the pills", and then they tore him to shreds.  I haven't had a good night's sleep since.

[Shtik]

I'm telling ya, Shtik, there was this one time we were WAY DOWN DEEP, trying to avoid Nazi Hell Creature depth charges, and I kept telling Nigel, "We're running out of air", and she just kept giggling and poking LMNO - who was DRIVING - right in the back of the neck with a spork.  I finally said fuck it, and told Hirley0 "BLOW THE BALLAST TANKS", but he just said "No."

So I did, because the little candle we had lit was going out on account of the bad air.  So, anyways, we breach the surface next to highway I-10, on the shoulder, and the damn drill bit spins out.  Curly was kinda new, and I couldn't stop him before he opened the hatch.  The overpressure blew him right out of the conning tower like a cork.  What could we do?  The sand critters had him the moment he landed, and they started tossing him around, like a cat will with a mouse. 

He didn't even scream, he just shouted "It's just the pills, Roger!  It's always the pills", and then they tore him to shreds.  I haven't had a good night's sleep since.

If the moral of the story is to stay away from Tuscon, then point duly noted.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I'm telling ya, Shtik, there was this one time we were WAY DOWN DEEP, trying to avoid Nazi Hell Creature depth charges, and I kept telling Nigel, "We're running out of air", and she just kept giggling and poking LMNO - who was DRIVING - right in the back of the neck with a spork.  I finally said fuck it, and told Hirley0 "BLOW THE BALLAST TANKS", but he just said "No."

So I did, because the little candle we had lit was going out on account of the bad air.  So, anyways, we breach the surface next to highway I-10, on the shoulder, and the damn drill bit spins out.  Curly was kinda new, and I couldn't stop him before he opened the hatch.  The overpressure blew him right out of the conning tower like a cork.  What could we do?  The sand critters had him the moment he landed, and they started tossing him around, like a cat will with a mouse. 

He didn't even scream, he just shouted "It's just the pills, Roger!  It's always the pills", and then they tore him to shreds.  I haven't had a good night's sleep since.

If the moral of the story is to stay away from Tuscon, then point duly noted.

We didn't have a choice, not really.  It was them or us, man.