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Weirdest Goddamn Thing

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, August 22, 2012, 03:15:44 AM

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The Good Reverend Roger

So, we're going out to meet these hired geeks for dinner.  They're "communications specialists", but they can't give decent directions to the most famous restaurant in their home city...A Cajun place called Randall's, on - get this - Kalliste Saloom Blvd.  Their directions having proven useless, we punched up the GPS, and promptly disobeyed it, making a left instead of a right.

Now the weird part.

The GPS is showing us on the RIGHT path.  None of the streets line up, of course, and the GPS is not giving us that nasty-voiced "RECALCULATING" thing that says you fucked up.  So we pull over, and the car image in the GPS keeps going, while hit reset and made angry monkey noises at it.  I kept waiting for it to say "I'm sorry, Dave, I can't do that."

Finally, I asked myself "What would Triple Zero do?" 

So I turned it off, and then on again.  Instantly, all was right.  We got the the restaurant, and I enjoyed crawfish etoufee, something delicious I'd never had before, while listening to "communications specialists" prattle loudly over live (bad) faux-cajun music.

Morals:

1.  Louisiana is a bad place.

2.  Lafayette is a bad place.

3.  GPSs are not to be trusted.

4.  Never go to a restaurant on a street named in any part "kalliste", and

5.  Crawfish etoufee is to fucking die for.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Richter

Consultants are people who specialize in making you think you need them, and then showing you why you don't.  Especially the ones who talk about communication.  They tend to attract free food and coffee, a benefit to the rest of the office ecosystem.

I learned about GPS on the ocean.  They are not to be trusted unless you already know where to go based on a chart.  Much like the booze, the moment it smells dependency it will screw you.

Damnit, I want cajun food now.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Richter, Baron von on August 22, 2012, 03:38:28 AM
Consultants are people who specialize in making you think you need them, and then showing you why you don't.  Especially the ones who talk about communication.  They tend to attract free food and coffee, a benefit to the rest of the office ecosystem.

I learned about GPS on the ocean.  They are not to be trusted unless you already know where to go based on a chart.  Much like the booze, the moment it smells dependency it will screw you.

Damnit, I want cajun food now.

I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHO THE GPS WAS ACTUALLY TRACKING!

Am I Nigeling or something? 
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Richter

It's like 2001 meets Minority Report.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

The Good Reverend Roger

In the universe next door, I got there early, beat the geeks silly, and made the hipster Cajun band eat their instruments.

And I went to jail before I could eat my etoufee.

The GPS got the wrong Roger, like in Jingo.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Richter

We need to find and occupy the universe where that goes down and they give you a medal for shit like that.

..HIPSTER CAJUN BAND?
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Richter, Baron von on August 22, 2012, 03:45:26 AM
We need to find and occupy the universe where that goes down and they give you a medal for shit like that.

..HIPSTER CAJUN BAND?

It was awful, Richter.  I may never be the same.

I mean, I'm against this sort of thing.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Richter

Let's keep in mind the REAL cajun band.  The one that got put out a gig because some highwater and hornrim shitshow.  They'll be waiting out back to have a bit of a chat.


..and when I am declared Emperor, there is only one man on this continent who will be allowed to keep his ukelele and his hands at the same time.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Richter, Baron von on August 22, 2012, 03:52:11 AM
Let's keep in mind the REAL cajun band.  The one that got put out a gig because some highwater and hornrim shitshow.  They'll be waiting out back to have a bit of a chat.


..and when I am declared Emperor, there is only one man on this continent who will be allowed to keep his ukelele and his hands at the same time.

Alty?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

Because you'd BETTER not be talking about those shitheels in that weird velvet lava lamp bar you savages dragged me into.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

Also, if you're gonna be emperor, I have dibs on running the adeptus mechanicus after we jam you in a freezer.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Richter

I'll accept Alty as number 2, based on your recon.

I banged better tunes out when I was 3 and drunk than most of those trended troglodytes could manage.  Because I am a merciful and kind ruler, they will get to choose one orifice where we will NOT stick their instrument.  The rest is in the hands of fate, as personified by a d12.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Richter, Baron von on August 22, 2012, 04:11:24 AM
I'll accept Alty as number 2, based on your recon.

I banged better tunes out when I was 3 and drunk than most of those trended troglodytes could manage.  Because I am a merciful and kind ruler, they will get to choose one orifice where we will NOT stick their instrument.  The rest is in the hands of fate, as personified by a d12.

But the human body only has 9 orifices, so...OH MY GOD
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Richter

Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on August 22, 2012, 04:10:16 AM
Also, if you're gonna be emperor, I have dibs on running the adeptus mechanicus after we jam you in a freezer.

Dude, I'll be running state business from the "Golden Throne".  You'll have to teach these transhumanist freak the right values.  Like the values of power armor, horrible grippers, and floating skull remote spotters.
Quote from: Eater of Clowns on May 22, 2015, 03:00:53 AM
Anyone ever think about how Richter inhabits the same reality as you and just scream and scream and scream, but in a good way?   :lulz:

Friendly Neighborhood Mentat

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Richter, Baron von on August 22, 2012, 04:13:37 AM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on August 22, 2012, 04:10:16 AM
Also, if you're gonna be emperor, I have dibs on running the adeptus mechanicus after we jam you in a freezer.

Dude, I'll be running state business from the "Golden Throne".  You'll have to teach these transhumanist freak the right values.  Like the values of power armor, horrible grippers, and floating skull remote spotters.

Yeah, no more of that hippie "singularity" bullshit. 

CLEANSE THE HERETIC!  BURN THE MUTANT!

Your innocence proves nothing.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.