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That line from the father's song in Mary Poppins, where he's going on about how nothing can go wrong, in Britain in 1910.  That's about the point I realized the boy was gonna die in a trench.

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Topics - the last yatto

#151
peedy, or how the west was lost, page twenty eight paragraph two and three, should read as the following:

Write your Erisian Affirmation in five copies, or the Aneristic version if that's your thing.
Have copies certified, then sign your name and nose-print each copy or not.
One copy must be sent to the President of the United States (electronic mail sent to president@whitehouse.gov is acceptable)
Send one on the next {Discordian Holyday} to Cabal of THE WORD -><- 733 11Th Avenue -><- New York, NY 10019-5051
Eventually nail one to a telephone pole. Hide one. And burn the other.

Please allow six to eight weeks for delievery of your Ordination Certificate.
#153
Principia Discussion / 23 skidoo
January 13, 2009, 02:30:26 AM
#155
Or Kill Me / I has intermittens, ASK ME ANYTHING
December 22, 2008, 02:04:03 AM
what is intermittens? what is the ultimate question?
why do you wanna know? yak me Anthony!
letters to the editor be damned; crazy but no sause required
some answers are best left to grasshoper with too much time.
groups will be awarded points based on questions asked and laughted at
fails will be mocked and explained into the dirt road taht used to have a horse

answer are best left questioned,  questions are in bold foam
why do they call the things in your ass hemorrhoids and the things in the Hemisphere asteroids?
Great crash there question, lets say it involves a very long story about blood tl;dr Blame the Greeks Orr not
Who put the bomb in the boom-a-bump-a-romp
likes to shake his hand, but his name is not his own; wut?
Sirus asks When will the world really end?
Sam says never, only you will end, then the universe will repeat itself.
Is it wrong to use kosher salt on ham? well Bacon is a vegetable.
Why is the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? same reason the first thing school teaches you is your name
Is a combo really cheaper if you don’t get it fun sized? only if your bank card lets you keep the change
otherwise its lost to the cents pyramriod  scheme, just as am/pm gets lost with the daylight saving.
somehow the scheme makes you loose sleep over it.
currently @Worthwile st., no you aren't, why yes i am why don't you wave to me?
did you know showtime's weeds is on DVD? no but i just got laided.
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it? de de des
Who put the bop in the bop-she-bop-she-bop? IO-Us,
If mathematics is empirical, xplain imaginary numbers. negative numbers allaw loans
so Do you Turkey Curse often?
only since the sunset accident, and sudden closure. but its starting to become addictive
Now How do you eat cap’n crunch without hurting the roof of your mouth?
they were made in eriszona, guess for yourself! theats something best left to thinking,
apond thinking wise man says, use last of milk on ceral have none for quick cheesy meal
Who put the dip in the dip-de-dip-de-dip? clause is coming to explain.
How come abbreviated is such a long word? why do you always ask word questions to an idiot?
Jesus put the ram in the ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong/Judge Wigglet Punch says so
some asshats say the universe is everything, and that it is expanding, what is it expanding into?
accident. Zeus farted and created the big bang, which he soon got bored of so he started teaching monkies to
fight the fish and the fish to shit in the monkies' water
weird thing is this was teh causeto see which would wind after Loki kept asking him which would win in a duel and wouldnt shutuop about the fact that one was on land and the other in the sea... to which he would always answer then what the hell was the great flood about to which lead to the collaspe of said terrasphere greating some other big bang for the gods to fight over. Erris sure worked them over good didnt she.
under god indisibiable with liberty and justice for some
that was yetis from outer space, now for commericals
things you know you need them, you know you want them
mumbo jumbo gumbo chilli, so good you will slap your mama
Snarky McBullhorn -how is a raven like a writing desk?
most people think its because poee wrote on both, but i think its a maze of fail myself
biggest clue to this fact would be the whig party assassins who tried to take him out according to paranoia issue #45
nevermoar would the theather troops haunt those in the know about trivial thoughts such as free will
Darf MurderFace -Why is pee different from poop?
pee is a biproduct of sex, poop is a byproduct of eating too much

team that fnord built
Malcalypse The Latter - where are all the answers? inside the Pax Discordiania or cram's etc duh
Rigoberto - what is the meaning of lice?
remind humans and cabbages alike that everything is about getting a head
the meaning of life is that your alone in a time loop at the end and the beginning
THursday - who named the days? conspiracy days or discordant ones?
That Guy - Am I gonna get sick? pillz help keep the plague in check, i think this is a plan of the pharm companies as a fail safe to retain bower...
sources tell me all they have to do is stop issuing them and we all turn into zombies
Joku-Mu Estonian - What's the frequency? 66.6
Calypso The Latter - HOW? classified
St. Worthwile - Wut? thetas the point really, that and well this other
Broken AI - I have an embarrassing rash on my male DIN output. Could I have caught it from that Z81 I interfaced with at the bar last week? She said she was defragged ... begs to question is Sussex safe? you break it you buy it
God - If I made a taco so spiced even I could not eat it, would I vanish in a puff of illogic? :ERROR: need moar dogma
vodka - When will the world really end? July 5, 1998
hooray fibslager - why is this so odd? ? it was like that when i bought it
RudeRyan - What does the hard barrel in my pants mean!? barrel is task, the rest you fan cigure out
Rev Shade the Nostalgic - Why does salt docent go well with milk?
all the cows are being used for meat, so secretly they been using slugs to make up demand
Flanders - Were you up on my roof last night stealing my weather vane? no vomit
pope zero - did i eat the cookie? your quota is three for the week, so you h ave two liefs left
RedRyan - Why are there so much perverts in the world and none of them is my girlfriend? GOD HATES YUO!~
Sleepingowl Earthdragon - gamecocks and the naughty girls who hide them...are where exactly? Venus
What if they made 23 all up? ITS JUST A FUCKING NUMBER, unless you have seen pi then its controls the stock market
Isn't that not a question? The Mad Alhazred-Head injuries. serious questions or nonsense questions we take all kinds here, most answers are invited to join us, with the rest in exile for being lame judes
Isn't Operation Mindfuck a way of making them more like us?
Yes, to collage universes upend golden flakes just for the Luz
Isn't that what they are trying to do? actually to tell you the truth, no,
for you see only real discordians actually do more then just talk
Does that make Pope Zombie more like them or them more like zombies?
as employee of the month of Umbrella corporation for like 23 months, it would hurt my stock options to tell you such
Who is "us"? "Them"? whats Worthwile? hate and love
What would cthulu do? what would garfield do?
I have read scary stuff about 2012. Should i be scared? Please tell me whats going on!!??
2012 is just internation test, maybe 'this is just a drill' or not. big fireworks is
when a rival alien god shows up in about 2036 :sause: http://neo.jpl.nasa.gov/apophis/

:pax:
Have you played the game 1000 Blank White Cards?

If yes, what is your opinion of it?



#156
Discordian Recipes / Quantum Theory of cake
December 18, 2008, 09:40:15 AM
or  :?
#157
Or Kill Me / fucking with the troupe
October 07, 2008, 01:22:48 PM
Today was a normal day like any other. Dreamt about my commune with Che flag above my bed and the mannifeso under comrade soviet party sleeping set. I woke up, followed my usual morning routine or not, decided on sugar coated golden apple scraps, had a bowl or two. Then decided it was time and left my comfortable home. My comfortable little box on the hillside.  Boarded the Mass transportation into downtown, people and the bus are generally to be avoided unlike Airplanes has better single serving friends, who also happen to be screened for weapons but EVERYONE on the bus gets drunk none the less eh? well maybe not the Pilot of this eight wheel beast. Anyways on the bus, well it wasn't that empty and there wasnt many single seats, but a few. Calm was the ride over the hills and through the woods. The ride went along the street, and here I am my own business. Sometimes paying attention to some conversation here and there, not trying to be noisy but listening for key things. About the beetdoom of some sports game or whatever, or details of their life with this or that person. You know usually cabbage type stuff.


Now Ive set a mood let me tell you what happen,
or was allowed to transpire or not.
Here is written where IT HAPPEN
or toke place

"Hey man is this seat taken"
asked some handsome dark haired set with the usual high and tight cut male. Wearing his jock uniform tho instead of pimping some sport like he used to do back in the Highschool days it was now US ARMY, using it with the same uppity attitude. You know the type, pushed kids into lockers, borrowed lunch money. Dated the popular girls. Didn't hang out with losers

"YEAH I MIND YOU FUCKING BABY KILLER"
I think I finally snapped hearing these words come out of my mouth. His right hand connected with my JAWBONE. Spinning I sat back down in my chair. The driver unaware that his country was already being defending by the armed services, started to notice this commotion with watchful eyes of what was going on as with the rest of the bus.

Most people would defend their country when asked to do so, not I, and I don't think this is a bad thing, but would people really put this much effort into defending a Roman soldier back in the day, sure they were smart enough to avoid conversation and usually just let the legion of soldiers do whatever they wish for fear of angering them like some almighty in the sky. Well some villages might, for you see there was No good shits over there and had nothing or were bored not sure on ancient history here. Anyways they wanted what the good shits had here, or there WAIT WHERE AM I? o yeah on a bus with a mild concussion screaming like a girl, that you just hit me, yeah really a  fine example of an alpha male archtype.

At this point the conversation is a blur.


Defending imperialism,


YOU NO GOOD SHIT.


NOTHING BUT A Bouncer for Uncle Sam,


So go ahead toss me off the bus like some unwashed hippie,



*sniff* actually i could use a shower


fnord.  I did the wage slave thing


Agrestic illusion
"Yea sure man have a seat"
#158
Or Kill Me / can I has wool?
October 06, 2008, 10:30:20 AM

If everyone is so cold, is that why trools come to start fires, why does everyone look at me, im an ice kinda person I LIKE THE FUCKING COLD, id move to alaska but i her their pink population is worse then texas... even tho it owuld be nice to homestead and plant my seeds, but er hi welcome, do i feel left out never owned a pair of mittens. this should make me sad, until i noticed what ive become over the years, shit ive been yeti for a good ten years and shit just seems to be getting worse, or better I CAT tell from this angle yet

what have i done ive sat here for 3 days without encouragement. heck its been more like 50, I know i dont get it, and like to follow and obey like a good little Bobbie but im stuck wondering, did i just stub my toe on the way to the fucking roof? or was the point to be outside the entire three days not moving just sitting there, fuck that if thats what it took for enlightment id have scored that shit years ago watching TV. then again maybe there is some wisdom in the TV except to admit that i would have to jump off a bridge, despite what my mother told me not to but you all would only encourage that. Infact thats the nice things about people, you can always expect asshat to complain, i get it really, wasnt hugged enough as a kid, or brother got all the attention. I dont know it seems like the rich kids are stuck up but thats ok cause they have more then one house, while the poor get rent free. Its us middle class fucks taht suffer in this economic war. which is why sometimes socialism makes  some comman sense, but equally poor NAY EQUALLY RICH.


  Who started it anyways, dont yuo DARE SYA ERIS Or or ill wack you with a mackel, why a mackel? well the trout wasnt fresh... but label me as things outside of my realitiy is good to reset the system but im still FUCKING UP MAH SPELLING AND ALL, just to make your eyes hurt.

your spelling isnt that bad, we seen worse, infact your typos is a good way of showing your some redneck and not an elist libber like us. Wut? Besides we are using machines now they can check up on that. well why cant the machine do my thinking too, be alot easier on me, not thinking and all. makes you wonder why English was a pass subject, its ok Billy, no not the little one, the crazy one from the tv, you know the one whos soul missing in life is to annoy old mandy? except this one isnt very evil at all, nope just a drunk catholic, which attending service almost makes me laugh, i can see why people think god is in the tv, its cause these boring bastards dragged it in there. I know a little Latin cause it sounds classic to use, plus it was the educated form of english per say, or however backward or ass you wanna put it, IM RIGHT Your left? I thought this was a party where is the booze?

HEY dont look at me im just here for the false slack.
#159
Or Kill Me / this post is the answer
September 16, 2008, 10:01:39 PM
n/t