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Can we talk about me now? (Open bar thread #3,494)

Started by Juana, October 04, 2012, 04:31:11 PM

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LMNO

Pitch a wobbler.


I assume you can't throw them out, nor can you move, so the only sensible alternative is to freak the fuck out at them.

Cain


Juana

Exaggeratedly sort the mail. Throw it at them, full force, with lots of "GEE THANKS GUYS" as you do so. Leave dishes in their rooms. If they take it back to the sink, put the dirty dishes on their pillows. Leave cleaning supplies in front of their bedroom doors.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

LMNO

"You think I'm a bitch NOW!? You keep this bullshit up, and you will know the true and ancient meaning of a 'Fury'. You can either live with a high-octaine cunt, or you can GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER AND STRAIGHTEN THE FUCK UP."

The Good Reverend Roger

I am home sick today, so all I'm going to say is that you should wound their inner children and throw shit.

Every rent-share has the crazy one.  It is better to BE the crazy one, rather than to experience the crazy one.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: American Jackal on October 25, 2012, 02:37:16 PM
Quote from: Man Green on October 25, 2012, 02:25:37 PM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 25, 2012, 04:16:23 AM
Quote from: Man Green on October 25, 2012, 03:10:47 AM
Quote from: American Jackal on October 25, 2012, 12:56:11 AM
Also, math professor broke minds today when asked how to graph the imaginary roots of a parabola on an real 2d coordinate plane.
"I can't graph in 4 dimensions, but it's ok because you don't have 4th dimensional eyes"

I don't know what that means. What math class are you in?

Precalc.

Oh, ok. I'm taking that next term.  :lulz:

I also think I am older than my math professor.

I know for a fact that I am older than mine. In fact, I only have one professor I'm younger than.

In other news, Johns Hopkins is recruiting and it's a program I know I would get into, but that's in Baltimore. :(
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Man Yellow on October 25, 2012, 06:06:29 PM
I am home sick today, so all I'm going to say is that you should wound their inner children and throw shit.

Every rent-share has the crazy one.  It is better to BE the crazy one, rather than to experience the crazy one.

This.

Full-blown temper tantrum. Break things that are not yours.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

I had this text conversation with my daughter last night:

QuoteJ: When should i be home

K: 6

J: Mom that's in 20 minutes

K: It was in 45 minutes when I sent that.

J: Oh

K: OK whatever, get here before raped-and-stabbed-to-death-by-a-greasy-hobo thirty. What time do you think you should be home for matters of safety and responsibility? Whatever time that is, that's when I want you home.

J: OK ok I will start heading home jesus

I'm so unreasonable.   :lol:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Mesozoic Mister Nigel

I seriously think that I should teach a high-school class in being a decent roommate. Not because I'm fabulous to live with, but because it seems like most kids enter the adult world with absolutely no idea, and then spend the next ten years learning the hard way.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


trippinprincezz13

Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 25, 2012, 05:50:49 PM
Pitch a wobbler.


I assume you can't throw them out, nor can you move, so the only sensible alternative is to freak the fuck out at them.
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on October 25, 2012, 05:57:25 PM
Exaggeratedly sort the mail. Throw it at them, full force, with lots of "GEE THANKS GUYS" as you do so. Leave dishes in their rooms. If they take it back to the sink, put the dirty dishes on their pillows. Leave cleaning supplies in front of their bedroom doors.

These. Maybe they'll get the hint. Maybe they won't, but at least it'll be cathartic and nothing else seems to be helping. I've had to do it before and it's mostly worked, but I suppose that could also be because I've mostly lived with decent, if occassionally inconsiderate, people.

If that doesn't work, what Cain said, but exchange "sink" for "corner of their room" since if it's in a common area, they'll probably wait for you to clean it
There's no sun shine coming through her ass, if you are sure of your penis.

Paranoia is a disease unto itself, and may I add, the person standing next to you, may not be who they appear to be, so take precaution.

If there is no order in your sexual life it may be difficult to stay with a whole skin.

Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: trippinprincezz13 on October 25, 2012, 06:19:59 PM
Quote from: LMNO, PhD (life continues) on October 25, 2012, 05:50:49 PM
Pitch a wobbler.


I assume you can't throw them out, nor can you move, so the only sensible alternative is to freak the fuck out at them.
Quote from: Secret Agent GARBO on October 25, 2012, 05:57:25 PM
Exaggeratedly sort the mail. Throw it at them, full force, with lots of "GEE THANKS GUYS" as you do so. Leave dishes in their rooms. If they take it back to the sink, put the dirty dishes on their pillows. Leave cleaning supplies in front of their bedroom doors.

These. Maybe they'll get the hint. Maybe they won't, but at least it'll be cathartic and nothing else seems to be helping. I've had to do it before and it's mostly worked, but I suppose that could also be because I've mostly lived with decent, if occassionally inconsiderate, people.

If that doesn't work, what Cain said, but exchange "sink" for "corner of their room" since if it's in a common area, they'll probably wait for you to clean it

Or their pillow. Or pee all over their bedding.
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


LMNO

Quote from: Man Green on October 25, 2012, 06:12:58 PM
I had this text conversation with my daughter last night:

QuoteJ: When should i be home

K: 6

J: Mom that's in 20 minutes

K: It was in 45 minutes when I sent that.

J: Oh

K: OK whatever, get here before raped-and-stabbed-to-death-by-a-greasy-hobo thirty. What time do you think you should be home for matters of safety and responsibility? Whatever time that is, that's when I want you home.

J: OK ok I will start heading home jesus

I'm so unreasonable.   :lol:

I wonder what would happen if she said, "Great, see you at 11:30!"

Q. G. Pennyworth

Just one thing: don't wait until they're already cleaning to complain about the fact that they don't clean often enough.

(QG has lived with idiots)

Kai

So, I go to the doctor to talk about last week's test results today.

He tells me, due to my impaired fasting glucose levels, I've got a percent chance of developing diabetes over the next 5 years. Unless I change my diet and exercise routine. I tell him what I've been doing.

I say, I've cut all sugary fruits out of my diet. He says, no, you shouldn't do that, sugary fruits are fine to keep in, they're full of nutrients.

I say, for example, bananas in the morning have been a bad idea for me. He says, that doesn't make sense, bananas are mostly starch.

I say, bread is also a problem, and I've been eating wheat bread. He says, wheat bread should be fine.

I tell him, potatoes on the other hand don't seem to be causing me problems. He says, that doesn't make any sense, potatoes have a high glycemic index.

So, basically, everything I've been learning from paying attention to my body, my moods and my blood sugar levels, he throws back in my face with contradictory advice.

Then he hands me an article on lowering blood pressure with exercise. Which is hilarious, because my blood pressure is already quite low, and if it was lower I would start having problems. It's low enough that I have trouble getting enough blood to test myself.

I said thank you, walked out of there, and thought...was that at all useful? REALLY? DID I JUST WASTE MY TIME?!? What good advice he gave I was already doing, and the rest contradicted what I'm learning from experiment. So, basically, I'm done with this advice. DONE. I'mma listen to my body, and if I feel good and my blood sugar levels look good, then I'mma do it. Regardless of whatever self proclaimed expert says. DAMN.
If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. --Loren Eisley, The Immense Journey

Her Royal Majesty's Chief of Insect Genitalia Dissection
Grand Visser of the Six Legged Class
Chanticleer of the Holometabola Clade Church, Diptera Parish

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: ZL 'Kai' Burington, M.S. on October 25, 2012, 08:10:22 PM


I said thank you, walked out of there, and thought...was that at all useful? REALLY? DID I JUST WASTE MY TIME?!? What good advice he gave I was already doing, and the rest contradicted what I'm learning from experiment. So, basically, I'm done with this advice. DONE. I'mma listen to my body, and if I feel good and my blood sugar levels look good, then I'mma do it. Regardless of whatever self proclaimed expert says. DAMN.

Self-proclaimed?

I thought he was a doctor.  Anyway, you're right.  You should stick with your opinion on what's good for you.  Don't listen to those secular "doctors" and their "science".  You should totally experiment with your metabolism.

These people can help you:  http://www.mystickwicks.com
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.