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Celebrities Who Shouldn't Have Musical Careers

Started by Cramulus, January 17, 2012, 03:59:05 PM

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Cramulus

January 17, 2012, 03:59:05 PM
This has been my obsession as of late.

It started when I discovered that Rodney Dangerfield had a hip hop single called "Rappin' Rodney"



Behold and Despair: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLGxWPtgodo

It's pretty catchy, actually. And No, Rodney doesn't "rap", he just delivers a bunch of his classic one-liners with some backup singers. The whole thing is hilarious because (1) there is no way in hell that this was Rodney Dangerfield's idea (2) at one point in history, this is what music producers thought rap music should sound like.

The Good Reverend Roger

#1
January 17, 2012, 04:00:18 PM
Actually, I think it WAS his idea.  The video was one of the funniest things he ever did.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cramulus

#2
January 17, 2012, 04:03:39 PM
Our next stop on the tour is in 1987. Bruce Willis has an uplifting message for us: "Respect yourself"!



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CKsRLu1gnM

Bruce Willis manages to stay in the background and doesn't embarrass himself too much, the other singer carries most of the song.

The Good Reverend Roger

#3
January 17, 2012, 04:04:09 PM
You go too far, Cram.

What's next, that jackass from Miami Vice?
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

AFK

#4
January 17, 2012, 04:05:31 PM
I would throw every singly one of the Disney Channel/Nickelodeon Teen Princesses into this category. 
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Cramulus

#5
January 17, 2012, 04:09:13 PM


Joey Lawrence, "Nothing My Love Can't Fix"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7FtI3cmZ38


Joey's pretty hilarious even without the music career. A year or two ago, LMNO asked the WOMP Cabal to assemble some images to use in a music video about Joey Lawrence strangling a stripper.

I'll share some of those with you now.







Cramulus

#6
January 17, 2012, 04:14:20 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 17, 2012, 04:00:18 PM
Actually, I think it WAS his idea.  The video was one of the funniest things he ever did.

oh true, the video is hilarious, it's just from a period (1983) where everybody was trying to cash in on the rap music, and a lot of really awful music was made which is pretty cringeworthy today. That might be a good thread topic too, early hip hop recorded and produced by white guys.

AFK

#7
January 17, 2012, 04:16:31 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on January 17, 2012, 04:14:20 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 17, 2012, 04:00:18 PM
Actually, I think it WAS his idea.  The video was one of the funniest things he ever did.

oh true, the video is hilarious, it's just from a period (1983) where everybody was trying to cash in on the rap music, and a lot of really awful music was made which is pretty cringeworthy today. That might be a good thread topic too, early hip hop recorded and produced by white guys.

sidebar:  http://youtu.be/5bxXldurOEo  That would be Alice Cooper and Mitch Pileggi (aka Skinner from the X-Files) rapping
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Cramulus

#8
January 17, 2012, 04:18:52 PM
In 1988 Joe Pesci released an entire album written from the point of view of his character in My Cousin Vinny. And yes, he raps.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4et8Dt6rco&feature=player_embedded#at=39

The Good Reverend Roger

#9
January 17, 2012, 04:23:27 PM
Quote from: Cramulus on January 17, 2012, 04:14:20 PM
Quote from: The Good Reverend Roger on January 17, 2012, 04:00:18 PM
Actually, I think it WAS his idea.  The video was one of the funniest things he ever did.

oh true, the video is hilarious, it's just from a period (1983) where everybody was trying to cash in on the rap music, and a lot of really awful music was made which is pretty cringeworthy today. That might be a good thread topic too, early hip hop recorded and produced by white guys.

It was invented by a White guy, by the name of Lord Buckley.
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Cramulus

#10
January 17, 2012, 04:24:20 PM
Eddie Murphy and Rick James teamed up Party All The Time



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5LX16zia2k



look at Rick James, this is the best hair in hip hop:



at first I thought it was just Eddie Murphy wearing a ridiculous wig a la The Nutty Professor or something

Cramulus

#11
January 17, 2012, 04:32:43 PM
triplezero   you can just HEAR everybody in your thread THINKING "please don't anyone mention the Hoff PLEASE"
triplezero   but, the Hoff


thanks trip





http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3382491587979249836

Jump in Hasslehoff's car... just make sure he hasn't had like 31 beers.




             

Cramulus

#12
January 17, 2012, 04:37:47 PM
I'm not sure if this counts, but a young Vin Diesel was in a "how to breakdance" video in the deep 80s.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mPfrj-3zwlI&feature=player_embedded#!

Cramulus

#13
January 17, 2012, 04:42:42 PM







For a short period of time, Scott Baio was known as "the Michael Jackson of Japan". No shit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8b6TyrDRCac

Be glad this song doesn't have a full video.

Cramulus

#14
January 17, 2012, 04:46:28 PM
Russell Crowe: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIzxoITH2Hg

Kevin Costner: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qB7YnYqEF0E

These are bad, but not as awful as I'd hoped.

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