Principia Discordia

Principia Discordia => Or Kill Me => Topic started by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 16, 2012, 03:57:25 AM

Title: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 16, 2012, 03:57:25 AM
Fuck off
Go away
No one ever liked you
No, not even me
I don't know why I put up with you for so long.

Don't pretend you didn't see this coming
I never mattered to you, either
Just a safe place to hide
From the cold
You didn't even ask to be let in.

I should have listened to my friends
When they said you were no good
But I was too proud
And too dumb
And too trusting.

So I let things slide
And I hoped that you'd get better
That if I was patient
And kind
Things would resolve themselves.

I was only a kid.

I remember that night,
The light by my bedstand
When I finally had enough
And tried to make you leave
And found it hurt too much.

I was ashamed
Of myself
Of you
Of the pain
So I hid it, pretended it didn't matter.

And you dug your fucking heels in
Bastard that you are
Wheedling your way into my life
And my body
Like it's a thing you already own

No more of this bullshit.

I will boil you in acid
And I will drag you out by force
I'll cut you down
And throw you out
With the rest of the morning garbage

And it will hurt,
I know it hurts
And this hole you leave in me
May never, ever heal
I just have to hope it will.

Because I'd rather spend my life
Walking around
With a goddamn hole in my foot
Than spend one more minute
With you.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: East Coast Hustle on October 16, 2012, 05:27:03 AM
I don't know if this is about a romantic partner or a plantar wart.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: tyrannosaurus vex on October 16, 2012, 06:02:48 AM
Powerful....


Also, I get this every time I ask if we can watch Evil Dead instead of a Hoarders marathon.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 16, 2012, 02:14:35 PM
Quote from: East Coast Hustle on October 16, 2012, 05:27:03 AM
I don't know if this is about a romantic partner or a plantar wart.

The "boil you in acid" part is what gives it away

Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: East Coast Hustle on October 16, 2012, 02:25:04 PM
That assumes one is unwilling to pursue that course of action in both circumstances.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 16, 2012, 02:27:04 PM
It's depressing that this is the longest running physical relationship I've ever had.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on October 16, 2012, 05:48:21 PM
Aw, man. :(

Little Orange has Plantars warts. It bums me the fuck out. Good luck with yours!
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 16, 2012, 06:04:16 PM
If you can help Little Orange get them dealt with while they're still small(er), it's much better than waiting. I was a dumbass and left them around for over a decade without taking them seriously.

Also, thanks. Hope your adventures in holes end well, too.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Anna Mae Bollocks on October 16, 2012, 06:14:01 PM
My dad had one that choked off the circulation to his second toe and they amputated the whole toe. He used to get phantom itching. Weird.

When I got them, they burned them out. They used a little gun thingie that shot lightning.

Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 16, 2012, 06:44:15 PM
AWESOME!

Not, you know the amputee part, the other thing...
with the lightning... :oops:
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: Q. G. Pennyworth on October 17, 2012, 11:46:38 PM
In related news: OW OW HOLY FUCK OW.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: navkat on November 10, 2012, 05:47:34 AM
Quote from: East Coast Hustle on October 16, 2012, 05:27:03 AM
I don't know if this is about a romantic partner or a plantar wart.

The like button for this comment is not working.
Title: Re: An Ode to the Hole in the Bottom of my Foot
Post by: navkat on November 10, 2012, 05:48:28 AM
Also, sometimes they're the same thing.