LMNO-PI

[LMNO]

Editor's Note:  LMNO is currently being put to work on an extremely boring and tedious bit of litigation.  The reason this affects you, dear reader, is that he will be temporarily be unable to continue the Exciting Icelandic Saga-- um, that is, the Gripping Detective Novel that is "LMNO-PI".  We apologize for the delay, and assure you, dear reader, that this story is in no way over.  Why, we haven't gotten to the Caffeinatrixx, or the Triple Doom Oracles, or the Haiku battels, or the Scrabbleists!  Not to mention the exciting conclusion...  Actually, we're just hoping it's exciting, since we have no idea how this is going to turn out....

[Great Teacher Largo]

Editor's Note:  LMNO is currently being put to work on an extremely boring and tedious bit of litigation.  The reason this affects you, dear reader, is that he will be temporarily be unable to continue the Exciting Icelandic Saga-- um, that is, the Gripping Detective Novel that is "LMNO-PI".  We apologize for the delay, and assure you, dear reader, that this story is in no way over.  Why, we haven't gotten to the Caffeinatrixx, or the Triple Doom Oracles, or the Haiku battels, or the Scrabbleists!  Not to mention the exciting conclusion...  Actually, we're just hoping it's exciting, since we have no idea how this is going to turn out....

Readers demand the Caffeinatrixx...  at LMNO's convenience.

I love it.

[East Coast Hustle]

\m/

dude...how did you know what I was listening to this morning?

"whaddaya mean I don't pay my taxes? Why do you think I'm broke?"

[LMNO]

\m/

dude...how did you know what I was listening to this morning?

I have my ways, and my spies....  The ELF has infiltrated the NSRA...



Again.

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

\m/

dude...how did you know what I was listening to this morning?

I have my ways, and my spies....  The ELF has infiltrated the NSRA...



Again.

Thanks for spilling those beans.....

But I believe you are a little too late.

[LMNO]

Stickied for your convenience.

[agent compassion]

RAH! Now the glorious saga is safe from the jaws of autolock yes?

[Bella]

It would be, except that The Mgt turned quietly turned the auto-lock off a couple of weeks ago. And I've been quietly unlocking all the threads for a while now. But this still deserves to be a sticky.

[East Coast Hustle]

ha!

victory is OURS!!!!

[Irreverend Hugh, KSC]

ha!

victory is OURS!!!!

Or Roger's.

I tend to see it as Roger's.

[LMNO]

Getting back into the car, Erin asked, ,ÄúSo now what?,Äù

,ÄúNow we go to the place your phone originated.  Somewhere in that bit of code was its Location of Origin.  Those kinds of devices tend to have Meta Code built into it, so any one line of code contains up to 23 other aspects of the program.,Äù

,ÄúAnd that Troll was able to read that?,Äù

,ÄúYeah.  Aini may be fucking annoying, but she has her uses.  Sometimes.  But I try not to push it.,Äù

,Äú,ĶAnd it came from a Coffee Shop?  No, wait, let me guess,Ķ It,Äôs actually a transdimensional Communist Dojo actively engaged in bringing down the Establishment.,Äù

,ÄúActually, that,Äôs more the NSRA,Äôs style.,Äù

,ÄúThe what?,Äù

,ÄúNew Soviet Red Army.  I,Äôm not willing to get them involved yet.  You know things are going poorly when you need to get them involved.  Kinda like killing a mosquito with a bazooka.,Äù

,Äú,ĶBut, a coffee shop.,Äù

,ÄúIt really does seem ridiculous, doesn,Äôt it?  But these quasi-bohemian college-lifestyle hangouts really are the best places for breeding dissent, and for staging unpredictable acts of subversion.  What Cop is going to be able, not only to fit in, but to be able to sift through the conversations going on in one of those places and figure out which ones are flights of fancy, which ones are honest plots, and which ones are coded messages?,Äù

,ÄúBut LMNO, you seem to know these places pretty well.  You even seem to be friendly with some of these people.  And you say my phone came from there?,Äù

,ÄúTechnically, yes, according to Aini.  But all she really knew was what ,Äòhome base,Äô the phone was programmed to report.  And since there,Äôs no screening policy at the shop, and they have public computer access,Ķ  Well, there,Äôs no telling who could have been there.,Äù

,ÄúAh.  Hey,,Äù Erin motioned to the dank streets and storefronts of The City.  ,ÄúWe just passed the Starbucks,Ķ,Äù

,ÄúYou are aware, of course, that coffee is not a trademarked beverage, yes?,Äù

,ÄúNo.,Äù

,ÄúAs it turns out, marketing material aside, Starbucks doesn,Äôt own coffee, nor the practice of making it.  I swear, usually I joke about Illuminati plots and the Starbucks conspiracy, but when they were able to successfully outbid and out-brand virtually all other coffee companies, I wasn,Äôt so sure.  Suffice it to say, any current alternative coffee places are Underground.,Äù

,ÄúLike the Bar we were just at?,Äù

,ÄúWell, not so underground.  The place isn,Äôt conscious, and it,Äôs open to the public.  But it,Äôs run by a very stern mistress:  The Caffeinatrixx.,Äù

We pulled up to a freshly-painted monstrosity of concrete inside the University Row District.  The beams and rebar the contractors used in this section of the city were of such poor quality, they started folding in on themselves almost immediately.  The precise angles, meant to relax and mentally stimulate, were horrible to contemplate now, and produced such headaches of anyone looking at them for too long that the college dropout rate eventually became 100%.  The hum of human activity inside the building compared to the barren street would be welcoming to even the most claustrophobic sociophobe.  We stepped inside before the psychotecture became too much.

Inside, the air was thick with exotic cigarette smoke and the rich smell of roasting coffee.  There were hundreds of people here, sitting at small tables, some trying to pose as sophisticated intellects, others trying their best to stay awake, their eyes skittering to and fro, their fingers twitching slightly.

Erin grabbed my arm, and leaned in close, her perfume cutting through the atmosphere of the coffee shop, making me dizzy, thinking about rope swings, and summer ponds.  ,ÄúWhat the hell is that?,Äù

I looked in the direction she was pointing.  At first glance, it was a woman.  A beautiful woman, bound by a black leather corset and a mini skirt.  But then a second look revealed the differences: From her head sprouted two cat ears, and poking out beneath her skirt was a tail that swished lightly in the air as if testing the environment for prey.  She was talking to a small table of people, and when she smiled, you could see the needle point of her razor sharp teeth.  But cat ears and a tail weren,Äôt the oddest things about her.  When she moved, it became obvious that her knees bent in the opposite direction, much like a cat standing on its hind legs.  ,ÄúThat,Äôs Malaul.  The Caffeinatrixx,,Äù I said.  Her ears twitched in my direction, and she turned.

Scowling, she stalked over to us, a growl in her throat.  She flexed her fingers, and claws extended from where her fingernails should have been.

,ÄúMaybe this wasn,Äôt such a good idea,,Äù I said,Ķ

[agent compassion]

   

:wonders what would happen if the NSRA got into the story:

[Malaul]

one thing thats funny to me about the Illumiati thing is that some of the starbucks have this one decorating scheme where there is a pyramid and eye in it
Ill see if i can find a pic for you


L - I cant wait to see what happens next


::swishes tail::

[LMNO]

L - I cant wait to see what happens next


::swishes tail::

Yeah, me neither.  Glad to see my pineal glan's back in action, though.

And AC-- you never can tell what the NSRA's gonna do....

[agent compassion]