The Boringest Man on Earth

[LMNO]

... says "please" and "thank you" without being passive-aggressive about it.
... pays their taxes.
... understands and accepts the idea of a "social compact".

[Salty]

...pushes chairs in when leaving the table, even at fast food places.
...doesn't say much during an initial group social encounters.
...buys and prepares food in bulk to save money and create a sense of regularity for family.
...performs household cleaning tasks on a regular basis to avoid buildup.

[Salty]

We are talking about ourselves, right?

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PsnxDQvQpw

[Q. G. Pennyworth]

We are talking about ourselves, right?

I was talking about Merrick Garland, but you can talk about whoever you want.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

[LMNO]

Jerry!
Garry!
Terry!
Larry!

[rong]

...owns 11 CDs
...all "greatest hits" or "best of"
...alphabetized

[MMIX]

tells you that it isn't 'boringest' it is 'most boring'














repeatedly

[Freeky]

...orders a hamburger at a fast food place, making sure to specify that they should not put onions, lettuce, pickles, mustard, or ketchup on it.  And thoroughly enjoys his burger, first bite to last.

[Freeky]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PsnxDQvQpw

[hooplala]

...his favorite drink is a virgin White Russian.
...misses the Lawrence Welk show
...makes a big deal over the difference between "less" and "fewer"
...has every Miss Manners column glued in to a scrap book
...really wishes Steve Forbes would run for president again
...believes Beyoncé runs the Illuminati
...had never dropped a coin in a fountain, because he considers it gambling
...refuses to lunch with people who don't wear wingtips
...believes Andy Warhol is a fictional character people just keep putting in movies
...thinks daisies are underrated

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I feel like I must have missed the setup to this joke, because I really don't get it. Why are we making fun of people?

[Sung Low]

...does what he likes

[The Wizard Joseph]

I feel like I must have missed the setup to this joke, because I really don't get it. Why are we making fun of people?

I just started in like a dog chasing a car, but I really liked how you made a bunch of boring but highly positive additions. Ima try.

... will never have a police record and probably never deserve one.
... has almost certainly fed more homeless people personally than any dozen hipsters combined.
... has a credit rating so high that it could qualify as a magical power in some circles.
... actually cuts a bit extra out of his budget beyond the standard tithes for outside charities just because it helps people.