Little ways to entertain yourself

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Sometimes, annoying things happen. Cram was talking about his coworker just blowing up at little things, and I suggested that perhaps he could entertain himself by blowing up similarly about other little things... really, really little things. Like the color of a chair.

In Mr. Language's apartment, the paper-thin walls allowed us to enjoy the details of his neighbors' lives, late at night when we were trying to sleep. The lady to the north liked to have intense one-sided arguments for hours, and I used to imagine her having them with her cat.

The guys to the south would stay up into the wee hours, and we heard a low hum of conversation and the clinking of glasses and bottles, punctuated by outbursts of laughter. One night, Mr. Language rolled over and said "I like to imagine that they're sitting around a little table with a ping-pong ball on it, discussing the ping-pong ball." After that, every time they started us out of sleep with their laughter, we couldn't help giggling, too.

[Suu]

Whenever my neighbors are playing music at a wee hour of the night, or just annoyingly loud, I plan a counterattack.

Typically the song is this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A52p9jc-gOo


Edit: Okay, maybe not quite the same, but I get entertainment out of my own ways!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

Whenever my neighbors are playing music at a wee hour of the night, or just annoyingly loud, I plan a counterattack.

Typically the song is this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A52p9jc-gOo


Edit: Okay, maybe not quite the same, but I get entertainment out of my own ways!

That reminds me of when a bunch of little shits were blasting bad rap from their car in front of my house for an hour, and I finally got fed up and put on Carmina Burana at top volume with my front windows open.

[Suu]

Yeah, today I got flipped off by my rude Indian next door neighbors when I asked them not to smoke outside of my backdoor because it's a fire hazard (They're ashing on a fucking SUITCASE THAT'S BLOCKING MY DOOR.)

So...on went Hooker with a Penis, hence why I'm still blaring Aenima.

Tool will continue until the back steps are clear, assholes.

[Slyph]

The problem with blasting tool and stuff. is that nobody knows you're being contemptuous.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Atticus70?blend=6&ob=5

You should play something that there's no fucking way anyone will believe you're just "rocking out" to. Anything in this channel really. Or Calliope.

Anyway, What I do, is I pit my endurance against Jehovah's Witnesses. They're not really supposed to disengage as long as you're willing to talk to them. So keep talking. Have a lot to say. Bore the shit out of them. Filibuster them to tears.

Also a good technique to use at the dole office, if you ever find yourself unemployed. "So how did this week go?" If you tell them enough trivialities they ask you less questions.

[Luna]

Bagpipes.   

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

Bagpipes.   

Seconded. I love bagpipe music but it never fails to clear the room / house / neighborhood when I let 'er rip.

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

I make flour paste and cut it into little chunks and let it dry. Then put it in plastic baggies. When I take the trash out I let it drop on the ground. Then we take bets on how fast one of the crackheads will find it and spazz.

What? It's boring in the ghetto and you can only call the number of gunshots in a night for so long before it gets old.

[East Coast Hustle]

I make flour paste and cut it into little chunks and let it dry. Then put it in plastic baggies. When I take the trash out I let it drop on the ground. Then we take bets on how fast one of the crackheads will find it and spazz.

What? It's boring in the ghetto and you can only call the number of gunshots in a night for so long before it gets old.

Fucking awesome!

When I lived in Belltown in Seattle (back when it was nasty before it got all yuppified), we used to hang a weighted $5 bill out the window from a fishing pole, and watch the crackheads freak out when we reeled it down the sidewalk and up into the air.

[Dysfunctional Cunt]

I make flour paste and cut it into little chunks and let it dry. Then put it in plastic baggies. When I take the trash out I let it drop on the ground. Then we take bets on how fast one of the crackheads will find it and spazz.

What? It's boring in the ghetto and you can only call the number of gunshots in a night for so long before it gets old.

Fucking awesome!

When I lived in Belltown in Seattle (back when it was nasty before it got all yuppified), we used to hang a weighted $5 bill out the window from a fishing pole, and watch the crackheads freak out when we reeled it down the sidewalk and up into the air.

Damn and I thought the dollar on a fishing line was fun, we'll have to try that in the big tree out back!!!   

[Richter]

I like to say random bizzare shit to my roomie Nurse East.  She used to just get appauled, but now she's rollign with it and BS'ing right back at me.

Sometimes I pick up an odd object from my desks or shelves, and try to picture it as a spaceship.

Whenever people gripe about phallic imagery / fixation / penis envy, I challenge them to figure out the vaginal equivalent.  I have yet to receive a satisfactory answer.

I design weaponized multi purpose sewing  or weaving devices.  (The steel lucet with screwdriver and bottle opener is still one of my favorites)

I also stop looking at areas as part of a city, office, whatever, and imagine it completely empty of any people.  Like it was part of the first "Myst" game.

[Luna]

(The steel lucet with screwdriver and bottle opener is still one of my favorites)

I need one of these!    Gave my lucet away to a lady headed on deployment so she'd have something portable to work on.

[AFK]

I like to tell stupid jokes at staff meetings.  Of course puns are included. 

[Telarus]

I make flour paste and cut it into little chunks and let it dry. Then put it in plastic baggies. When I take the trash out I let it drop on the ground. Then we take bets on how fast one of the crackheads will find it and spazz.

What? It's boring in the ghetto and you can only call the number of gunshots in a night for so long before it gets old.

Fucking awesome!

When I lived in Belltown in Seattle (back when it was nasty before it got all yuppified), we used to hang a weighted $5 bill out the window from a fishing pole, and watch the crackheads freak out when we reeled it down the sidewalk and up into the air.

Damn and I thought the dollar on a fishing line was fun, we'll have to try that in the big tree out back!!!   

Hahah. My cousin (south cal surf rat), when he was younger, would do that with peanuts and ground squirrels. I bed the crack-heads run just as fast.

[Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.]

I pick random words that occur often in the ordering process and ascribe a function to them. I sing a little jingle for "provalone", do a short dance if someone says "combo" . . . etc. My goal is to get them all doing something like the Macarena or Chicken Dance for a sammich.