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Hope

Started by Luna, September 14, 2011, 10:08:50 PM

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Luna

Once upon a time.  (That's how all stories are supposed to start, isn't it, children?)  Once upon a time, there was a woman.  Some say she was the first.  Some say she was created by the gods as a punishment upon mankind.  It si said that the gods loaded her down wight gifts, but nobody seems to know what most of those gifts were.  Some say they were gifts to "seduce" men, but then, theo nes telling the story are mostly men, and hearing a man blame women for his own weakness is hardly anything new, is it?  (Yeah, women do it, too, but how often do you hear that a MAN is the root of all evil in the world?)

Anyway, however she got it, this particular woman had one particular gift.  It was given to her, but some asshat told her, "It's all yours, but, whatever you do, don't open the damn thing."

Yeah, like THAT was going to work out. Give any monkey a box, sooner or later, it's going to get opened.  Tell that monkey NOT to open it, and the lid will be off the minute your back is turned.

(I know, you've heard the story.  Shut up and listen, or fuck off.)

So, eventually, she opened it.  She pulled the lid off the jar, or box, or whatever it was, and all the evils in the world flew out.  The little ones were first.  "Light" evil.  Jaywalking in front of oncoming traffic and making you slam on the brakes.  Talking in the movie theater.  Giving away spoilers for the book you haven't read, yet.  The petty shit that drives you buggy.  Then bigger stuff, and bigger.  By the time the woman got her shit together enough to slam the lid back on, some pretty big shit was out in the world.  Rape, murder, the big guns.

Then she heard a voice from the box.  It was beautiful, and begged for her to let it out, too.  So, like any decent horror story, the stupid bimbo opened the box and let out the last thing.

According to the story, that last thing was "Hope."  The story says it got shoved in the box to make all that evil bearable, sort of an apology, "Oops, we let her turn the world to shit, here, this will make it so you don't jump off the nearest bridge."

Bullshit.

Here's the truth.  What settles to the bottom of a big box of evil isn't bright and shiny.  Oh, it was hope, all right.  It's that beautiful voice that whispers in your ear that everything is going to be fine and wonderful.  You've heard it.

"Just work harder, you'll get that promotion you deserve, it won't go to the chick down the hall just because she's blowing the boss.  She doesn't actually do any WORK around here..."

"Keep on buying those lottery tickets, sooner or later ONE of them will hit, and you can stop eating Ramen noodles."

"If you just have the house PERFECT, and don't say anything to make him angry, he won't hit you any more."

"Love him enough, love him HARD enough, and he'll feel the same way.  Just keep trying, never mind anybody else."

You've heard it.

It's full of shit...  And sometimes, it's the biggest fucking evil of them all.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Pope Pixie Pickle

fucking awesome stuff luna

Luna

Thanks, Pixie.  I'm apparently in a mood.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Suu

Luna, you'll be pleased to know that there was no "Hope" in Pandora's Box. The word "hope" did not exist in the Ancient Greek vocabulary, and it's but there in modern translations to give the story some sort of moral.

The moral is that there is none. The Greeks were merely telling us that we're fucked forever, but the romantic Victorians wanted nothing to do with it. I'm pretty sure the words that did fly out last were, in fact, "You are fucked forever." in Greek. Or something like that.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

P3nT4gR4m

Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2011, 10:24:10 PM
Luna, you'll be pleased to know that there was no "Hope" in Pandora's Box. The word "hope" did not exist in the Ancient Greek vocabulary, and it's but there in modern translations to give the story some sort of moral.

The moral is that there is none. The Greeks were merely telling us that we're fucked forever, but the romantic Victorians wanted nothing to do with it. I'm pretty sure the words that did fly out last were, in fact, "You are fucked forever." in Greek. Or something like that.

I prefer Luna's version. Better edge

ETA: In fact, I hereby canonise it. And god bless all who sail in it!

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Phox

Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2011, 10:24:10 PM
Luna, you'll be pleased to know that there was no "Hope" in Pandora's Box. The word "hope" did not exist in the Ancient Greek vocabulary, and it's but there in modern translations to give the story some sort of moral.

The moral is that there is none. The Greeks were merely telling us that we're fucked forever, but the romantic Victorians wanted nothing to do with it. I'm pretty sure the words that did fly out last were, in fact, "You are fucked forever." in Greek. Or something like that.

If I remember correctly, there is a Roman version in which "hope" is there.

But yeah, no hope in the Greek version.

Luna

There are a lot of versions of the story.

This one is mine.
Death-dealing hormone freak of deliciousness
Pagan-Stomping Valkyrie of the Interbutts™
Rampaging Slayer of Shit-Fountain Habitues

"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep. Everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Quote from: The Payne on November 16, 2011, 07:08:55 PM
If Luna was a furry, she'd sex humans and scream "BEASTIALITY!" at the top of her lungs at inopportune times.

Quote from: Nigel on March 24, 2011, 01:54:48 AM
I like the Luna one. She is a good one.

Quote
"Stop talking to yourself.  You don't like you any better than anyone else who knows you."

Suu

But still, fuck hope.
Sovereign Episkopos-Princess Kaousuu; Esq., Battle Nun, Bene Gesserit.
Our Lady of Perpetual Confusion; 1st Church of Discordia

"Add a dab of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it."

Adios

Quote from: P3nT4gR4m on September 14, 2011, 10:26:52 PM
Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2011, 10:24:10 PM
Luna, you'll be pleased to know that there was no "Hope" in Pandora's Box. The word "hope" did not exist in the Ancient Greek vocabulary, and it's but there in modern translations to give the story some sort of moral.

The moral is that there is none. The Greeks were merely telling us that we're fucked forever, but the romantic Victorians wanted nothing to do with it. I'm pretty sure the words that did fly out last were, in fact, "You are fucked forever." in Greek. Or something like that.

I prefer Luna's version. Better edge

ETA: In fact, I hereby canonise it. And god bless all who sail in it!

Seconded.

Juana

Very nice, Luna. :) And yeah, I like the edge.
"I dispose of obsolete meat machines.  Not because I hate them (I do) and not because they deserve it (they do), but because they are in the way and those older ones don't meet emissions codes.  They emit too much.  You don't like them and I don't like them, so spare me the hysteria."

Freeky


Adios

Quote from: Jenkem and SPACE/TIME on September 15, 2011, 12:29:46 AM
Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2011, 11:19:07 PM
But still, fuck hope.

:kingmeh:

Preach that shit Freeky. As long as there is life there is hope. It may not come with a pretty pink ribbon around it, but in most cases life goes on. it is up to each of us to get from it what we may.

sotesla4

I don't put much stock in hope. I've had people call me an optimist, but I think it just comes down to trusting myself with being able to find a way to un-fuck a bad situation at least so my loved ones and I don't come out any worse for wear. I'm not "hoping for the best," I'm just fuckin' winging it and playing life and it's worked pretty fair so far.

Adios

Quote from: sotesla4 on September 15, 2011, 12:38:17 AM
I don't put much stock in hope. I've had people call me an optimist, but I think it just comes down to trusting myself with being able to find a way to un-fuck a bad situation at least so my loved ones and I don't come out any worse for wear. I'm not "hoping for the best," I'm just fuckin' winging it and playing life and it's worked pretty fair so far.

Of course. If I hope to win the lottery I at least need to buy a ticket, this ain't no christian prayer magick thread.

Freeky

Quote from: Hawk on September 15, 2011, 12:31:31 AM
Quote from: Jenkem and SPACE/TIME on September 15, 2011, 12:29:46 AM
Quote from: Suu on September 14, 2011, 11:19:07 PM
But still, fuck hope.

:kingmeh:

Preach that shit Freeky. As long as there is life there is hope. It may not come with a pretty pink ribbon around it, but in most cases life goes on. it is up to each of us to get from it what we may.

I may have to start a new thread for this idea, to keep from jacking Luna's thread (which the OP is stellar, btw), but even while we preach there really is no hope in The Church Of Tucson, we still have it.  False hope, maybe, but on the days when the God-City ignores us, it doesn't seem so false, and in hope we find the strength to take another step, and another, and another, and soon enough there is momentum, which raises the bar of hope just a little more, and then our backs straighten a little more, and our steps are lighter, and our spirits lift more, and eventually we're driving down Oracle road at 70 MPH, Fire Down Below blaring out the speakers or in our heads and hearts, and shrieks of delight pierce the hot, blinding rain, while up on the roofrackf its the other guy's turn at sunroofing.  

Eventually, that hope will be shattered.  That is the God-City's will.  But we never, ever, EVER say "fuck hope."*


*Unless it's the same circumstances as other people moaning "Never again..." on a Sunday morning.  And what invariably happens to that "Never again"? :lulz: