Ingredients:
- 1-2 lbs Chicken thighs (not deboned)
- 2-3 jars salsa
Instructions:
Put chicken in pressure cooker. Cover with salsa. Cook on high for 24 hours, or until bones melt. Feeds one person for 1-2 meals a day for a week.
Something is very wrong here.
This is like the Anarchist's Cookbook, but an actual cookbook.
Fire extinguisher sold separately.
I need to write recipes.
Extremely Easy Teriyaki Pork Chops:
Ingredients:
- 2-3 lbs pork chops
- Bottle of teriyaki sauce
Instructions:
Coat pork chops with teriyaki sauce. Put in oven with broiler on high for 6-7 hours. Serve with rice.
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 15, 2014, 12:08:54 AM
Extremely Easy Teriyaki Pork Chops:
Ingredients:
- 2-3 lbs pork chops
- Bottle of teriyaki sauce
Instructions:
Coat pork chops with teriyaki sauce. Put in oven with broiler on high for 6-7 hours. Serve with rice.
It can't be that easy. Shit would explode.
Rice:
Ingredients:
- Rice
Place in skillet. Cook on medium heat stirring occasionally 72 hours or until house is burned to the ground.
Elephant stew:
1. Dice one elephant.
2. Throw into pot with contents of one granary.
3. Cook for one week or until the tusks fall off.
Serves 300.
Quote from: Doktor Howl on December 15, 2014, 12:10:16 AM
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 15, 2014, 12:08:54 AM
Extremely Easy Teriyaki Pork Chops:
Ingredients:
- 2-3 lbs pork chops
- Bottle of teriyaki sauce
Instructions:
Coat pork chops with teriyaki sauce. Put in oven with broiler on high for 6-7 hours. Serve with rice.
It can't be that easy. Shit would explode.
No, you only get explosions with the pressure cooker recipes.
Quote from: Mesozoic Mister Nigel on December 15, 2014, 12:10:43 AM
Rice:
Ingredients:
- Rice
Place in skillet. Cook on medium heat stirring occasionally 72 hours or until house is burned to the ground.
:lulz:
Quote from: Doktor Howl on December 15, 2014, 12:11:26 AM
Elephant stew:
1. Dice one elephant.
2. Throw into pot with contents of one granary.
3. Cook for one week or until the tusks fall off.
Serves 300.
:lulz:
Oh shit. I just realized I said 'pressure cooker' when I meant 'crock pot'.
Quote from: Roko's Modern Basilisk on December 15, 2014, 01:15:45 AM
Oh shit. I just realized I said 'pressure cooker' when I meant 'crock pot'.
:lulz:
Quote from: Roko's Modern Basilisk on December 15, 2014, 01:15:45 AM
Oh shit. I just realized I said 'pressure cooker' when I meant 'crock pot'.
You, like me, have absolutely NO FUCKING BUSINESS in the kitchen. There is nothing good for us in there. Just fire department bills, paperwork, and broken windows.
A Good Time:
1 Meat Grinder
1 Your Junk.
Stick your junk in the meatgrinder. Repeat as necessary.
:lulz:
"Until the bones melt" is a great measure.
:lulz:
Lemme try one.
Baked Potato
Ingredients:
Potato
Fire
Tinfoil
Throw potato in fire.
Put tinfoil around potato.
Extinguish arms and clothes.
Eat potato when both you and the potato are no longer on fire.
If your teeth don't easily cut the skin there are several possible solutions: 1. remove the tinfoil first. 2. Extinguish your arms slower.
STEP ONE: MIX RAW GROUND BEEF WITH SHARDS OF GLASS
STEP TWO: EAT HANDFULS OF MEAT MIXTURE, SLOWLY, WHILE CRYING
STEP THREE: PONDER WHERE IT ALL WENT WRONG