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For my part, I've replaced optimism and believing the best of people by default with a grin and the absolute 100% certainty that if they cannot find a pig to fuck, they will buy some bacon and play oinking noises on YouTube.

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ITT, Post your favorite PD conspiracy theories.

Started by The Good Reverend Roger, October 08, 2005, 04:10:37 AM

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LMNO


Cain

Nope.  Zeus and Achilles.  That was part of the whole excuse for the war, to get Achilles iced.

LMNO

No shit?



Man, usually the ones that try to kill all the newborns who are a threat tend to get whacked in the end.  How did Zeus manage it?

Cain

Well, he waited until the kid was an adult.  And a near legendary hero.  And did it by proxy.  There was some skulduggery between him and Themis (or maybe Thetis?) to knock the lad off, according to some of the legends.  There was a prophecy that he could become the next king of the gods or something.  And the Trojan War was the perfect chance to do it.

P3nT4gR4m

'Trojan War' always makes me think of people killing each other with outsize condoms

I'm up to my arse in Brexit Numpties, but I want more.  Target-rich environments are the new sexy.
Not actually a meat product.
Ass-Kicking & Foot-Stomping Ancient Master of SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
Awful and Bent Behemothic Results of Last Night's Painful Squat.
High Altitude Haggis-Filled Sex Bucket From Beyond Time and Space.
Internet Monkey Person of Filthy and Immoral Pygmy-Porn Wart Contagion
Octomom Auxillary Heat Exchanger Repairman
walking the fine line line between genius and batshit fucking crazy

"computation is a pattern in the spacetime arrangement of particles, and it's not the particles but the pattern that really matters! Matter doesn't matter." -- Max Tegmark

Thurnez Isa

there has only ever been three members of PD.com
everyone else is just alts
Through me the way to the city of woe, Through me the way to everlasting pain, Through me the way among the lost.
Justice moved my maker on high.
Divine power made me, Wisdom supreme, and Primal love.
Before me nothing was but things eternal, and eternal I endure.
Abandon all hope, you who enter here.

Dante

LMNO

That's actually not a conspiracy, it's a proven fact.

AFK

Quote from: Thurnez Isa on April 23, 2007, 06:45:18 PM
there has only ever been three members of PD.com
everyone else is just alts

Okay, you got me.  I'm AKK.   :D
Cynicism is a blank check for failure.

Dr. Cow Ass

That I am a neo-nazi racist who first came to this forum as Trollax, fucked up, and returned as Doctor Cow Ass with plans to totally disrupt the forums and turn the people against Roger eventually leading to a total PD.com revolutionary war in which the entire community attacks Rog, but looses due to his Admin Powers :sad:

I bring the Spicy.


B_M_W

Quote from: Dr. Cow Ass on April 23, 2007, 07:39:05 PM
That I am a neo-nazi racist who first came to this forum as Trollax, fucked up, and returned as Doctor Cow Ass with plans to totally disrupt the forums and turn the people against Roger eventually leading to a total PD.com revolutionary war in which the entire community attacks Rog, but looses due to his Admin Powers :sad:



Wait, you're Trollax?




My mind's been blown...
One by one, we break the sheep from their Iron Bar Prisons and expand their imaginations, make them think for themselves. In turn, they break more from their prisons. Eventually, critical mass is reached. Our key word: Resolve. Evangelize with compassion and determination. And realize that there will be few in the beginning. We are hand picking our successors. They are the future of Discordianism. Let us guide our future with intelligence.

     --Reverse Brainwashing: A Guide http://www.principiadiscordia.com/forum/index.php?topic=9801.0


6.5 billion Buddhas walking around.

99.xxxxxxx% forgot they are Buddha.

East Coast Hustle

and apparently I'm Roger, since Roger apparently has admin powers.
Rabid Colostomy Hole Jammer of the Coming Apocalypse™

The Devil is in the details; God is in the nuance.


Some yahoo yelled at me, saying 'GIVE ME LIBERTY OR GIVE ME DEATH', and I thought, "I'm feeling generous today.  Why not BOTH?"

Dr. Cow Ass

^

Holy shit I always thought Roger had admin powers. In that case. everything I just said in my last post is completely hypothetical and was just a spurt of my imagination.

There will be no war...

                                               ...


                                                                  ...
I bring the Spicy.

The Good Reverend Roger

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: Dr. Cow Ass on April 25, 2007, 03:57:22 AM
^

Holy shit I always thought Roger had admin powers. In that case. everything I just said in my last post is completely hypothetical and was just a spurt of my imagination.

There will be no war...

                                               ...


                                                                  ...

Dang.  I wanted to hear all about the upcoming race war, too.   :lulz:
" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.