Okay, the fucking GOP is trolling. SHARK JUMPED, ITT.

[The Johnny]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

That actually crossed my mind. I was like "It's only six minutes, I could...

...

...no."

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

[The Johnny]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

What they don't tell you Northeners is that everything is deep fried and is eaten in triple layered taco form, that's why all my compatriots are fat.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

PUT DOWN THE LETTUCE, JOHNNY. NOW SLOWLY REMOVE THOSE TOMATOES FROM YOUR BOOTS.

[The Good Reverend Roger]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

What they don't tell you Northeners is that everything is deep fried and is eaten in triple layered taco form, that's why all my compatriots are fat.

I just had a senator tell me that your people are herbivores.

WHO AM I GONNA BELIEVE, HERE?  A SENATOR, OR SOME FOREIGNER SALAD-SUCKING GENETICALLY PREDISPOSED SICKLE CELL FRIED CHICKEN?  UM.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

What they don't tell you Northeners is that everything is deep fried and is eaten in triple layered taco form, that's why all my compatriots are fat.

I just had a senator tell me that your people are herbivores.

WHO AM I GONNA BELIEVE, HERE?  A SENATOR, OR SOME FOREIGNER SALAD-SUCKING GENETICALLY PREDISPOSED SICKLE CELL FRIED CHICKEN?  UM.

IS THE SICKLE CELLED FRIED CHICKEN CON QUESO WITH A SIDE OF ONION AND AVOCADO?

[The Johnny]

I seriously want a transcript of the whole thing. It's AMAZING.

Normally I would do it, but I'd have to stick a spork into my pineal gland after finishing it. 

THIS IS BECAUSE, BEING MEXICAN, YOU EAT TOO MANY VEGETABLES.  GREEN, GREEN VEGETABLES.

What they don't tell you Northeners is that everything is deep fried and is eaten in triple layered taco form, that's why all my compatriots are fat.

I just had a senator tell me that your people are herbivores.

WHO AM I GONNA BELIEVE, HERE?  A SENATOR, OR SOME FOREIGNER SALAD-SUCKING GENETICALLY PREDISPOSED SICKLE CELL FRIED CHICKEN?  UM.

You think nopales are vegetables? We call that MEAT, answer THAT smart guy!

[Mesozoic Mister Nigel]

I APPEAR TO HAVE FOUND THE SOURCE OF PORTLAND'S POVERTY: http://www.yelp.com/biz/alberta-street-market-portland

downs - $5.99 6 packs Milwaukie's Best Ice (i feel bad paying over $4.29 but i love the stuff)...

UPS -- CHICKEN CHICKEN CHIIICKKEEENNN !!!
honestly the best friend chicken in town and the cheapest!!
5 bucks lands you 6 piece chicken and a pack of Jo Jos ....

The chicken is like crack! (not that I have tried it, or maybe I have.. who knows...)

Anyways their prices are absolutely awesome and I cant recall a time I DIDN'T get an extra wing or 2 thrown in there...

5 stars!!

[Ben Shapiro]

The source of Houston's Poverty.

This screams Mexico:

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

The source of Houston's Poverty.

This screams Mexico:

Yeah, but Seguin has a KFC, a Chicken Express, a Church's AND a Rusty Rooster.

That should explain EVERYTHING.

[Ben Shapiro]

The source of Houston's Poverty.

This screams Mexico:

Yeah, but Seguin has a KFC, a Chicken Express, a Church's AND a Rusty Rooster.

That should explain EVERYTHING.

[Anna Mae Bollocks]

The source of Houston's Poverty.

This screams Mexico:

Yeah, but Seguin has a KFC, a Chicken Express, a Church's AND a Rusty Rooster.

That should explain EVERYTHING.

CHICKEN IS A VEGETABLE.

[President Television]

  GREEN, GREEN CHICKEN.