ATTN: BLEACHERS

[Lies]

I am a messenger of The Suns Heavenly Inevitable Transformation©, and I have come to warn ye all of YOUR DOOM.

For centuries now, you bleachers have been given a good run, with your pasty skin tones that have flourished in the ice ages and have accumulated much wealth on the backs and bloods of the TANNED OPPRESSED™.
You have given us, through the ages, all sorts of derogatory names to the TANNED OPPRESSED™, and have tried to eliminate us through extermination programs, have tried to limit our growth by providing us with free condoms, and have kept many of us from earning a fair and honest living by making us dependent on welfare and highly addictive drugs such as crack and KFC.

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.
As a messenger of The S.H.I.T, I have been informed through various voices in my head that your time has come.

You see, the earth is changing. Society is changing. And it is all changing in favor of the TANNED OPPRESSED™.
We have grown aware and have grown weary of you, and so has the earth and our great provider of life, the sun.

As the Suns chosen ELITE, we have evolved in ways that make us superior to you bleachers.
There is empirical evidence that we are favored, that we have been blessed with abilities and powers that far rival your own.
For example, we have the ability to GO OUTSIDE for EXTENDED AMOUNTS OF TIME in the HEAT OF THE SUN, and not have concern for the deadly effects of the Suns UV rays which HATES the bleachers skin.
We also, as a collective average, are bigger, stronger, faster and much better looking than you all. Also, we have bigger dicks than the bleached. (Yes, that includes our women as well.) And even if one of you bleachers is bigger, stronger, faster and better looking than any one of us individual TANNED OPPRESSED™, we can call on any of our brothers that are bigger, stronger, faster and better looking than you, so don't try and get smart with us.

But we, The S.H.I.T, do not hold anything against you bleachers. It's not *your* fault you are bleached and inferior, and we understand that. You didn't ask to be bleached, and it is not your fault that you cannot get a decent tan to save your lives, so know that we do not HATE YOU or FEAR YOU, but PITY you all.
And as such, in all our mercy and pity, have come up with a plan to HELP YOU poor bleached ones.
It is called, The Eventual Bleached Eradication Plan, and it it works pretty much as what it sounds like.

As The S.H.I.T prefers peaceful, non-violent means to ends, unlike you violence embracing, war loving bleachies, we will get rid of you all through GRADUAL means.
Fear not, for even though you are doomed, your children need not be, and can be SAVED from the wrath of the sun.

Here is how it will work and has been covertly working now for a long time, RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOSES.

First, the scorched earth policy- we are supporters of climate change and the GLOBAL WARMING that is caused by it. We welcome the suns rise in power on the earth, for The S.H.I.T know that we are favored in its heat, where as you bleachies ARE NOT. So we will be doing everything in our power to contribute C02 gasses to the atmosphere, and have been encouraging you bleachies to do the same, and you have, like the gullable idiots you are, been doing exactly that with your SUVs and wars with countries that are rich in C02 producing resources which you have grown to be so reliant on.

Secondly, breeding programs- we are and have been for a long time now, slowly but surely, breeding with the bleachers to produce offspring that have superior skin tone that is more suitable to the coming El Nino age, and eventually, you will be phased out as dated, inferior models, but will still have use as caretakers/slaves to your tanned offspring henceforth.

Thirdly, we have been slowly but surely acquiring all the wealth back from you bleachies that you STOLE FROM US IN THE FIRST PLACE, and have been investing in FOOL PROOF investment plans that have been provided to us by our Nigerian brothers, many of whom are wealthy exiled princes that just need investment capital to pay for the unlocking fees of their stolen wealth, and once we have given them enough, we tanned elite will be able to buy all the rest of you bleachies as slaves and pets.

Finally, we will be converting and burning all blasphemous images of our lord and savior, and replacing all heretical portrayals with a more logically correct and better looking savior-



NOW BLEACHIES, REPENT, GET IN THE FRONT OF THE BUS, AND GIVE US ALL YOUR BLEACHED WOMEN, AND ALL YOUR MONEY IF YOU KNOW WHATS GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR OFFSPRING, IT IS THE ONLY WAY WE CAN SAVE HUMANITY.

IN SOLIDARITY AND IN ONE LOVE, THE S.H.I.T.

 

[Telarus]

1) I feel yah. Iesus was a Black God (get over it Christophiles, it was the genetics of his area... same with Osiris).

2) Wow, you're a few decades behind the game yo:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Melanin_theory

I heard about his reading up on Marcus Garvey and his trip, and how it interfaced with the 'black supremacy' movement and 'Noble' Drew Ali and his Moorish Science Temple order.

[East Coast Hustle]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

The free condoms thing got me, since it's clearly as good idea to have less people and less AIDS.

[Lies]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

The free condoms thing got me, since it's clearly as good idea to have less people and less AIDS.

A bleacher like you would say that, wouldn't you.

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

The free condoms thing got me, since it's clearly as good idea to have less people and less AIDS.

A bleacher like you would say that, wouldn't you.

Ok then, enjoy your overpopulation and AIDS. The resulting plagues would be interesting from a historical perspective.

[Lies]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

The free condoms thing got me, since it's clearly as good idea to have less people and less AIDS.

A bleacher like you would say that, wouldn't you.

Ok then, enjoy your overpopulation and AIDS. The resulting plagues would be interesting from a historical perspective.

THE OVERPOPULATION AND AIDS YOU BLEACHERS GAVE US 

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

The free condoms thing got me, since it's clearly as good idea to have less people and less AIDS.

A bleacher like you would say that, wouldn't you.

Ok then, enjoy your overpopulation and AIDS. The resulting plagues would be interesting from a historical perspective.

THE OVERPOPULATION AND AIDS YOU BLEACHERS GAVE US 

How did we give you overpopulation? There's 2 billion non-bleachers in just two Asian countries alone. I think they overpopulated themselves.
As for AIDS we just manufactured that for gay people and Russians, but we forgot about bisexuals and Russian mail order brides. Whoops.

[Lies]

Somehow, out of all the things I could find to pick apart about this, THIS:

Well, I hope you enjoyed your little run of race superiority, as it will no longer last for long.

is the thing that really bothers me.

The free condoms thing got me, since it's clearly as good idea to have less people and less AIDS.

A bleacher like you would say that, wouldn't you.

Ok then, enjoy your overpopulation and AIDS. The resulting plagues would be interesting from a historical perspective.

THE OVERPOPULATION AND AIDS YOU BLEACHERS GAVE US 

How did we give you overpopulation? There's 2 billion non-bleachers in just two Asian countries alone. I think they overpopulated themselves.
As for AIDS we just manufactured that for gay people and Russians, but we forgot about bisexuals and Russian mail order brides. Whoops.

Don't you play coy with me motherfucker, you know damn well how you gave us overpopulation, and if you really don't, then you are even more ignorant than I first thought, but more likely, you're just lying.
You bleachers lie all the time, you and your white lies, like Santa Claus and Jesus, WHY DO YOU THINK THEY'RE CALLED WHITE LIES?

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Honestly sir i have no idea what youre on about. And what kind of scrooge are you to be hating on santa?

[Lies]

Honestly sir i have no idea what youre on about. And what kind of scrooge are you to be hating on santa?

You will be one of the first we'll eradicate by sending you to our breeding camps. Lets see how ignorant you'll be then.

ARBEIT MACHT FREI

[Nephew Twiddleton]

Breeding camps you say? I fail to see a downside. Also irish dont count as people remember?

[LMNO]

Dear Tanners,


Enjoy your melanoma.


Love,
Bleacher #56824

[Nephew Twiddleton]

[Lies]

Dear Tanners,


Enjoy your melanoma.


Love,
Bleacher #56824

Uhh, considering you guys are about a million times more likely to get it than us, it is WE who say unto you bleachies: Enjoy YOUR melanoma.