Mad at myself.

[Adios]

Nor do I fear god, hell, satan, or any of it. I can't die. The only thing I fear is the Christian heaven. If I go there I will kill myself.

[BadBeast]

Oh Italians are all superstitious as fuck.

[Adios]

Oh Italians are all superstitious as fuck.

Superstition is a O:MF.

[BadBeast]

Yeah, you need a "get out of Heaven free" card.
Or spend eternity with the fuckers

[Adios]

I will ask for two things at the doctors.

Anabuse.

Medical pot prescription.

[BadBeast]

I think we're all probably IP banned at Heaven anyway, on account of being Discordians.

[Adios]

I think we're all probably IP banned at Heaven anyway, on account of being Discordians.

[BadBeast]

I will ask for two things at the doctors.

Anabuse.

Medical pot prescription.

The Pot's probably a good idea, but he won't give you anabuse until you've been detoxed. He'll probably give you Valium or Librium, for the withdrawal symptoms.
They can be pretty severe without benzos.

[Adios]

I will ask for two things at the doctors.

Anabuse.

Medical pot prescription.

The Pot's probably a good idea, but he won't give you anabuse until you've been detoxed. He'll probably give you Valium or Librium, for the withdrawal symptoms.
They can be pretty severe without benzos.

All I know is, it has to stop. I am already on number 4 tonight.

[BadBeast]

Have you tried to stop before?

[Adios]

Have you tried to stop before?

Yes.

[Adios]

Ok, that was a weak response. I go 2 - 3 days without, then convince myself I can keep it to one or two a night. Next thing I know.......

[BadBeast]

Yeah, it's not the stopping that's hardest, it's staying stopped. I know AA works for a lot of people, but it's just all that 'Higher power' stuff, and level of misery that put me right off.  

[BadBeast]

Ok, that was a weak response. I go 2 - 3 days without, then convince myself I can keep it to one or two a night. Next thing I know.......

That's a really common pattern, seems like in the period without a drink, people manage to convince themselves that maybe it wasn't so problematic after all, and start again.

[BadBeast]

It's actually a bit of an eye opener, seeing how many behaviour patterns are centered around an addiction, and the lengths we go to to even avoid looking at it as an addiction. The realisation that we are powerless over such a large part of our lives is a hard thing to take on board.
Possibly the hardest thing about the whole thing.