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Before I'm hunted down and killed by some crazy avangelist or Jihad type character, let me start by apologizing. I personally have nothing against religion or those that read these books.

With that being siad......



Fuck the bible and Fuck the Quaran I wipe my ass with these pages. Fuck not eating pork. Fuck not eating meat on fridays. Fuck you. I'm hungry mother fuckers. Fuck the mormon bible. I'll  pull my dick out and shoot my warm sticky load all over the pages so it can't ever be opened again. Yeah fuck the shit out those books, blow it's spine out with my big paper cut bleeding cock hammer.



Let's travel through time, because if you were me, you'd be saying fuck the bible too.















The first time I went to church with my mother I asked her why we were here. I was 3 or 4 I think. She told me it was to see God and Jesus. The two priests giving the mass:

one had a brown beard and long hair.

The other was an elderly man with white hair.

Yeah I though I was in the presence of God and Jesus. So when I walked up with her thinking I was getting a snack(the little wafer and some jesus juice) from God And jesus. They laughed at me. They thought it was cute or somthing.

You think you ever want to get laughed at by God and the Big JC?

Yeah that shit scarred me.

Then my mother use to send me to bible study. Only I hated going because it was on wednesday nights, and Unsolved Mysteries were on wednesday nights. I loved that show.

How are you gonna send me to bible study to study unsolved mysteries of the past, when I could be watching unsolved mysteries of the present?


Then I used to be afraid of my own (native) religion, because all the christians would always say it was a form of devil worship.

So I stayed going to church, as much as I hated it. The humiliation of  having to do my first confession to some guy I didn't harldy know was ridiculous to me. As if a man could absolve me from the sin of being a 12 year old boy.

Then I went to this christian school, where I actually took time and studied the bible under the guidence of jesuits. I liked the stories then, and actually built some respect for the book.

But then the same jesuits, the ones that I studied under, accused me of smoking weed on our high school retreat in the mountains.

I knew they had no proof, and I couldn't understand why a priest wanted to get me in trouble over somthing so trivial as smoking weed, so I told them two Jesuits to go fuck themselves and go suck some fucking dick, because I new the only reason one of the jesuits entered priest hood is because he was raised with the idea that sucking sweaty man cock was a hell fire sin.


Then I seen this commercial about how Jesus came to america and talked to indians and if call this number you get the free book about it.

So I called the number, and they told me some guys were gonna deliver the book too.

I was 19 at the time.

So these two boys show up at my door step, they were both my age, and they wanted to talk to me about how I was going to hell.

They wanted to babtize me because, I don't know maybe I was dirty and they were some how clean. At any rate they were their to save me.

Once they realized they couldn't get through to me they left me alone. This was after about two or three months of counseling.






So some years go buy and I get  back into college and start studying the  history of why i'm here in these shitty conditions and why it is the way it is here.

I live on an indian reservation, and we're not third world country poor, but we're still as bad as it get's in America. No running water in places and no sewer, lot's of death because of narrow roads, and acoholism up the ass. Plus everyone's always violent for no reason.



I'll finish my menstraul whining later.......

Or maybe someone else was thinking it for me and I was just repeating it in my head but:


I walked into the acrcade in Video Blue. You know what i'm talking about, the Jerk off booths where you have to buy $3.00 worth of tokens, before they'll buzz you through. Anyways I noticed that nobody cleaned the booths in a good minute, and white crumpled tissue littered the floors and seats in every booth I checked( which wasn't very much considering that you don't know who's in each booth and it's kinda rude to be knockin on someones door mid-stroke).

And I sat in this jerk off booth in the state's rape capitol, and possibly the rape capitol of the country, it occured to me:

All of the booths had sound but everybody had the volume turned down. Everyone there (wich was probably 3 or 4 elderly males) had the volume down to 0. There wasn't even a faint grunt, a sound of flesh claping, or a hint of squishiness-there were almost no sound waves floating through the air.

Of course I wasn't there to pepper my meat this evening, I simply wanted the experience of seeing what it was all about. I was a curious little monkey so I inserted my token and was shocked to get my very first exposure to gay porn. Me being a straight male belted out with laughter and quickly changed the channel until I landed on some japeemation where a werewolf and a lizard-man were double stuffing a wonderfully drawn sailor moon type character, before they were all cut down by some japanese version of Oracle(remember from the He-man series?).

After spending my $3.00 worth of tokens and fullfilling my evening of entertainment, I stepped out to see a giant sign on the wall that I missed before.

"no lude conduct" it had two hands dripping and holding a tissue. The sign was placed right next to the tissue dispenser- The kind where it's like a paper towl size tissue, like in some Wal-mart bathrooms.

As I left the arcade and went back to browse the japeemation section to fullfill my new curiosity for Hentai, It dawned on me:

This place is covered in spank. Everything, everywhere, even the cashier, a large caucasion man with a mullet, kinda like the steroid injected version Joe Dirt- was amprehensive about touching anything in the store.

But not just in the  store, the whole block-

The bridal store across the street. Everything's probably touched up with someobody's dick fingers when they go back to check on their bride to be's shopping spree.

The diner on the corner, I can just picture the chef coming through for a quick spank before his shift or on his break.

The movie theatre around the block, makes me think twice before ordering buttered pop-corn.

But this is the part that really pisses me off....

My comic books. What kind of effect is semen going to have on my mint conditioned books? How many times a day does someone come through after a quick juicing session to place cum prints on the latest issue of spider-man? I hate to have one of these books pressed neatly in a cardboard backing and plastic bag, only to find out years later that the man-ly oils have destroyed the front cover.

But this anger actually liberated me, because I realize these books aren't worth saving unless you can read them, and they are bound to deteriate anyways.

But it's a false sense of freedom because everywhere I look now, I sense spank juice. It's all because of this mult-million dollar porn industry...........

The silence in that acrade made me realize that you don't need sound to jack off. Any one can be jacking off anywhere at any time, all they need is a few minutes of privacy.

Virtually everything you touch, ingest, interact with is subject to sombody's filthy palms.