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Bigotry is abound, apprently, within these boards.  There is a level of supposed tolerance I will have no part of.  Obviously, it seems to be well-embraced here.  I have finally found something more fucked up than what I'm used to.  Congrats. - Ruby

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How do I get molested by greys?

Started by I_Kicked_Kennedy, November 03, 2013, 03:45:04 AM

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I_Kicked_Kennedy

So, I want to be abducted and sexually abused by aliens. I've been on pain medication for three days and I haven't poomped, so I figure a good probin' will unleash the pile.

I've been sniffing glue and meditating with Richard Marx blasting on my headphones while facing alpha centauri, with my dick on a skateboard,8,1

Nothing.  What|the|fupp?!

Is it because I don't have tin foil? All they sell is aluminum.  So, need help: How poomp? Where ET?
If I had a million dollars, I'd put it all in a sensible mutual fund.

Bruno

On a scale of Aardvark to A Potatoe Named Gary, how much pain would you say you are in?
Formerly something else...

Telarus

The only time I ever saw 'the greys', I had ground up Amanita Muscaria w/ Psylocibe Cubensis.


I do not recommend this.





At All.
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The Good Reverend Roger

Quote from: I_Kicked_Kennedy on November 03, 2013, 03:45:04 AM
So, I want to be abducted and sexually abused by aliens. I've been on pain medication for three days and I haven't poomped, so I figure a good probin' will unleash the pile.

I've been sniffing glue and meditating with Richard Marx blasting on my headphones while facing alpha centauri, with my dick on a skateboard,8,1

Nothing.  What|the|fupp?!

Is it because I don't have tin foil? All they sell is aluminum.  So, need help: How poomp? Where ET?

You haven't been drinking enough water, have you?

Pain meds + insufficient water = hospitalized for blockage.

" It's just that Depeche Mode were a bunch of optimistic loveburgers."
- TGRR, shaming himself forever, 7/8/2017

"Billy, when I say that ethics is our number one priority and safety is also our number one priority, you should take that to mean exactly what I said. Also quality. That's our number one priority as well. Don't look at me that way, you're in the corporate world now and this is how it works."
- TGRR, raising the bar at work.

Ben Shapiro

Fly to Houston, Texas, and lay butt naked on Montrose Downtown.

minuspace

Quote from: I_Kicked_Kennedy on November 03, 2013, 03:45:04 AM
So, I want to be abducted and sexually abused by aliens. I've been on pain medication for three days and I haven't poomped, so I figure a good probin' will unleash the pile.

I've been sniffing glue and meditating with Richard Marx blasting on my headphones while facing alpha centauri, with my dick on a skateboard,8,1

Nothing.  What|the|fupp?!

Is it because I don't have tin foil? All they sell is aluminum.  So, need help: How poomp? Where ET?
Voudootronically, set the board up with mountain gears, and use the foil to bury that which commeth from your other head upon the summit.  Headphones can help you concentrate and not notice the white haired grey in disguise behind you at that point.  I'm not judging about the centauri thing.  Then go back home and have a light dinner.  Remember to be well tucked in when you go to bed.

If your doctor agrees, a spoonful of Epsom in water can also go a long (sometimes way too long) way, otherwise, I don't know how that might interact with the Meds  :?

I_Kicked_Kennedy

Quote from: Dirty Old Uncle Roger on November 03, 2013, 04:15:16 AM
Quote from: I_Kicked_Kennedy on November 03, 2013, 03:45:04 AM
So, I want to be abducted and sexually abused by aliens. I've been on pain medication for three days and I haven't poomped, so I figure a good probin' will unleash the pile.

I've been sniffing glue and meditating with Richard Marx blasting on my headphones while facing alpha centauri, with my dick on a skateboard,8,1

Nothing.  What|the|fupp?!

Is it because I don't have tin foil? All they sell is aluminum.  So, need help: How poomp? Where ET?

You haven't been drinking enough water, have you?

Pain meds + insufficient water = hospitalized for blockage.

Definitely a possibility. I'm going to get some of this water and drink it. Thank you for the tip
If I had a million dollars, I'd put it all in a sensible mutual fund.

Eukanuba

#7
I was recently speaking to somebody who seemed fairly normal but off-kilter enough that he might appreciate some angular thinking. I started talking about Grant Morrison and his Disinfo speech, the one where he talks about being abducted by aliens in Katmandu.

The guy I was talking to asked when this had happened, and I told him it was in 1994. He then looked very serious and told me that that sounded correct, because on all the evidence the aliens stopped abducting people around the year 2000.

I don't know how true this is, although I have met lizard people and big squid things on DMT and/or mushrooms, maybe they've got the contract now?




Mesozoic Mister Nigel

Quote from: Eukanuba on December 28, 2013, 12:50:56 PM
I was recently speaking to somebody who seemed fairly normal but off-kilter enough that he might appreciate some angular thinking. I started talking about Grant Morrison and his Disinfo speech, the one where he talks about being abducted by aliens in Katmandu.

The guy I was talking to asked when this had happened, and I told him it was in 1994. He then looked very serious and told me that that sounded correct, because on all the evidence the aliens stopped abducting people around the year 2000.

I don't know how true this is, although I have met lizard people and big squid things on DMT and/or mushrooms, maybe they've got the contract now?

:lulz:
"I'm guessing it was January 2007, a meeting in Bethesda, we got a bag of bees and just started smashing them on the desk," Charles Wick said. "It was very complicated."


Cain

The greys and the reptoids fell out after the Dulce base shootout.

I mean, geez, get with the time, people.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Quote from: 375 lbs of twisted steel and sex appeal on November 03, 2013, 04:35:14 AM
Fly to Houston, Texas, and lay butt naked on Montrose Downtown.

He doesn't want it packed in further, he wants it OUT.   :horrormirth:

Enema. Or go to one of those colon cleansing places and report back to us.  :lol:
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Cardinal Pizza Deliverance.

Eat a bag of spinach and then drink three Pepsis. You'll be flushed clean in no time.
Weevil-Infested Badfun Wrongsex Referee From The 9th Earth
Slick and Deranged Wombat of Manhood Questioning
Hulking Dormouse of Lust and DESPAIRâ„¢
Gatling Geyser of Rainbow AIDS

"The only way we can ever change anything is to look in the mirror and find no enemy." - Akala  'Find No Enemy'.

Anna Mae Bollocks

Or Jack In The Box "tacos". The ones they deep fry.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division

Odibex Grallspice

Sometimes you just have to reach in and pull it out  :lol:  Do not however spend much time straining, that's how you get hemorrhoids. Learned that one the hard way  :roll:

Anna Mae Bollocks

Ew.  :horrormirth:

Get it out (but not that way). People get diverticulitis and megacolon from stuff like that.
Scantily-Clad Inspector of Gigantic and Unnecessary Cashews, Texas Division